Child of Darkness and Light
by Lighter
Summary: Can Rocky exsist with only half of himself or will he give into the voice in the back of his head. Can he recover in the future when his problem lies in the past? warning slash content.
1. Chapter 1

A.N: Sorry for the first go, but that was just a fluke, woops! Ahaha. I like this version a lot better. To me, Rocky isn't the type to due trauma so he plays it off. And here's take two!

Disclaimer: I don't own the 3 ninjas or the back ideas that I'm gonna work into the story. It's from the wonderful makers of the movie of whom I owe my life. .

Claimer: Any character that you've never heard of or whatever and the plot itself is mine. Yay!

Chapter 1.

Is that them?

I can hardly see in the car, is she alone?

Why did my Mommy bring me here. I'm hungry!!

The crowd began to murmur when the green station wagon got closer to the driveway. Rocky bit into his tongue to keep from screaming. At first he thought that the voices he heard were his thoughts trying to figure out what to do now that he was free. But when he got closer to the house he heard things that he was sure weren't his self. The nosey housewives and their husbands and some of their children that weren't aren't school because of this very special occassion of a missing, young adult coming home.

"Jessica!" A woman yelled over the noise for his mothers attention.

Rocky's in the back seat; blanket over his shoulders, which hid the fact that he had undone his seatbelt. He was feeling too clostrophobic with it on and being in something as confining as a car didn't much help that.

These people are unbelievable. His mother's thoughts pressed into his mind as well.

Rocky chewed harder on his tongue trying to make the pain stifle the voices but they just kept coming in. How did Maria stand it! He sneered at the name. She did this to him, she opened a part of his mind that he was sure he had shut up forever and now that it's reopened and he's older, stronger, it's much clearer and more painful then when he was a kid. He never told his parents so many things that were going on with him, simply because he was afraid that they wouldn't understand. Young Rocky had come to this conclusion when he showed a kid at the park and the boy ran off screaming. He was sure his parents would do much of the same. Back when he was young these abilities, that Rocky thought everyone had, never bothered him. He used them in secret to entertain himself when he was alone and bored. But as he got older, he started to see the problem. He wasn't normal and no one would understand and worse, they might try to experiment on him. All that fear, all his families beliefs about such things had silenced the voices and the gift, leaving him seemingly normal.

_I'll never be normal again._ Thinks the green ninja. _With the gates open... How can I silence them now? I'm not even really sure I know how it is that I'm using them... It's all just sort of- happening!_ He bares his teeth, hand to his head as a headache comes on. _And now the headaches are coming back!_ Rocky jumped out of his skin when he heard the carhorn vlaring at someone blocking his mother's way into the driveway.

"Please I need to get into the driveway!" Jessica yells out the window.

Looking out the window through the peek of his left eye, Rocky sees that nearly half the next neighborhood has shown up since he didn't recognize a lot of the peoples faces. Not to mention, a bunch of other people he was sure just came because the news crew had a van parked across the street. What were they hoping to do? Get the scoop on what happened? Ask him about the psychotic woman and why she would grab someone as boring and not the best looking in town. Rocky would be the first in line to consider his self a 'plain-Jane' and wouldn't hesitate to change the mind of a females wandering eye. He didn't want people interested in him, and whenever he took a liking to someone, they would either find better- or find his brother Colt.

When the car came to a complete stop, Jessica pressed down on the horn again to move the people from the doors so they could get out.

What is her problem?! We're just trying to make sure her son is ok! A low tone growled. Does she think she's better than us now?

_How can my mother think she's better than someone because her son has been through a traumatic moment?_ He just didn't understand that comment at all. _Women have a weird way of thinking._ Rocky shot his attention at the door when it pulled open, breathing uneven, though, it's only his mother. He was still apprehensive of hers and anyone else's touch.

After his hospital visit he had covered cuts on his body, due to Maria's knife fit the night he tried to break out with Noelie, his shoulder has a large bruise on it from when she popped it out of place. He told the doctor that his arm was alright enough not to need a cast. They had given him all kinds of test and asked him humiliating questions. He refused to answer a lot of them then shut off, until they caved knowing they wouldn't get a word out of him so they allowed his mother to bring him home.

Jessica slipped an arm around her sons shoulders and helped him out of the car- big mistake. The crowd pushed in toward them, all wanting to touch the once missing male that most of them knew, and others only saw a picture of due to the flyers that were hung up all over the place and the comercials put on tv. Rocky pressed his back to the car feeling sufficated. Closing his eyes, he let his trembles take over but he quickly calmed them down.

_Don't show that you're afraid and they'll leave you alone._ Swallowing, he opens his eyes and looked out over the crowd. The news woman from channel 4 was standing not far away from him with her crew rolling for live footage; her short-cut brown hair blowing in the slight wind that swept up from nowhere.

Running a hand through her hair trying to salvage anything that might have moved out of place she speaks when her cameraman points at her. "This is Nina Post with the channel 4 news, and I'm outside of the Douglas home where the missing eldest son of the family has just been brought back to his loving family and friends. A group of neighbors and well wishers have come as well to see that the boy is ok. Let's see if we can get through the crowd," she begins to shove a woman out of the way. "To ask that same question ourselves. Excuse me! Excuse me! Jessica! Rocky!! Rocky!!!"

And that was another thing. He had heard so many people he didn't even know or consider a personal friend calling him by his ninja name. He wasn't sure if it were embarrassing or annoying. People claiming to be so close to him just because they saw his picture around and maybe thought that he was cute or something, and now this.

"No! Just back off! Let my son get inside and see his family!!" Jessica yelled at the news woman. "Everybody just back off!!" But the crowd kept moving in.

Rocky had to pinch his arm just to calm down because his breathing was starting to hitch again. All these people, so close to him. Why doesn't everybody just go the hell home!? Rocking, he begins to whisper, unaware that he's doing so.

"Go away, go away, go away, go away..." his voice began to get louder. "Go away, EVERYBODY JUST GO AWAY!!!!"

The crowd silenced at the boys outburst; Nina licked her lips with hunger making sure to give the cameraman a good view of the disgruntled teen. That's right, make him a speculation now.

Shaking his head, he lowered his voice. "Please, just leave us alone... You can, come talk to me tomorrow. Right now I just want to go inside an be safe..."

Oh that poor boy! A woman declared. Rocky could tell which one because a blonde slapped her hand to her chest as she thought it.

What have we done? Of course the poor boy can go inside where it's safe.

I knew it. My wife just had to drag me out here.

Does this mean we can go noooowww? A child whined.

"We're very sorry, Jessica, Rocky." The boy winced at that. "We're going to bring by a casorol so," waving a finger she used a teasing voice. "Don't you go making dinner dear, you just shower that son of yours with attention."

Nina seemed apprehensive, but at the same time she didn't want to look like a monster. So, waving a hand the camera turned off and they went back to the news van. Rocky knew they wouldn't leave. The media would get their scoop no matter what memory that had to dredge up to do so. Rubbing her son's shoulders, Jessica steered him towards the house.

Everything looked so different to Rocky. The air was cold, like no ones lived here for a long time. Didn't help that the weather was near rainy today. Guess it didn't know it was supposed to shine because life's little miracle has come home.

"Rocky." Colt said.

"Rocky." Tum chimed in.

His brothers left the sofa and barreled into him. Rocky coiled away from their touch as if it were just as icy as the house and he were metal absorbing all of it. He didn't hug them back for all the thirty seconds of it, just stood there waiting for it to end. When they moved away, both with sad looks on their faces, he knew he had hurt them and had to say something.

"I'm cold." That wasn't it.

"I'll go get you another blanket." Says Jessica.

"I'll get it!" Both his brothers insisted. Giving each other a glare, they tried again only to end up saying it together again. "I'll get it."

_Great. Now I have to worry about people being my Gophers_. Thinks the psychokinetic teen. "I know where the blankets are, I'll get it myself." He said in a calm voice.

"No sweet heart, you go sit on the couch and rest a bit."

Doing as he was told, because he knew he would feel the- NOW, if he didn't, Rocky took a seat on the arm chair, curled his legs in and wrapped the blanket tighter around his body. He's so very cold...

The house was silent, almost like you could hear dust forming on top of unmoving objects. Rocky sat on the couch, keeping to himself, eyes closed, bundled up inside his blankets. He could feel his brothers attention on him, he could feel his mother trying to get him back from the darkness she thinks he's in. Truth was, Rocky wasn't in darkness, he was fine. That's what he decided when he woke up in the hospital and saw his parents. He is fine. Jessica flocked all over him, he refused to touch her or let her touch him. His father wasn't exactly welcomed to try either but he did and received the same cold glare that his mother had got. But, Rocky is fine.

I wonder if he fell asleep like that? This was Colt. It's amazing how different he looks now, it been about four months since he went missing, but the change is so drastic!

Poor Rocky, Tum tum. He's probably been through hell, and thinks we're gonna act all weird around him.

_Won't you_? Thinks the elder Douglas boy. _After all, I'm the freak boy who got kidnapped and raped, abused by a woman that he could have easily escaped from physically if not mentally_... Sighing, he shook his head, opening his eyes. _Is this what Maria went through all her life? Hearing peoples thoughts because she couldn't turn them off, losing her mind because her abilities did it to her... I won't be that way, because I'm going to deny everything. So what if I hear voices, so what if I see dark shadows of people who have passed, it means nothing_.

Looking at his younger brother, he frowned. _Will you act weird around me? _Wondered the silent ninja. "You can talk if you want to."

"Hm?" Both boys chimed.

"Nothing." He replied quietly. Hoping to remove the awkwardness in the room, he cleared his throat. "So... How are you guys?"

Tum and Colt just looked at each other then back at their brother. This is what he asked them? How are they doing? They should be asking him that! He was the one who was in a comma like state for half a month. How is he!?

"We're good," Colt licked his mouth, voice hesitant and stammered. "Better now that you're home... How are you?"

"Fine." He quipped, quickly and tight. "I'm fine." Moving the blanket back he checked the digital watch on his wrist. _11:43 am_. "Did you enjoy Christmas?"

Tum tum swallowed, again, glancing at Colt before he looked to Rocky he spoke. "Rocky, we didn't celebrate. It wouldn't be right without you."

Rocky nodded. The room was quiet again. At least to the two occupants that couldn't hear the inner static floating through the air.

This is really uncomfortable. Is Rocky serious about being ok? Colt looked toward the kitchen. Maybe he said something to Mom, or they talked on the way over and he really does feel better.

I'm not buying this for a second, something is up. Just as Tum tum opens his mouth to talk, their mother cuts him off.

"Lunch boys, come and get it."

"Alright!" Jumping to his feet, Tum tum hurried into the kitchen like a small child that was promised cookies if he ate all of his lunch.

Rocky snickered at it. His brother hadn't changed a bit since he hit the teen years. His voice may be a bit different but as far as personality he's still that same hungry little seven year old living up to his ninja name.

Colt stood but looked back at the poor boy. "You want me to tell Mom you're eating in here?"

"No. I'm coming, I just wanna warm up a bit more first."

Unsure of whether or not he should leave, he nods. "Alright." Leaving the room, he made sure not to glance back otherwise he might have ended up saying something embarrassing that might upset Rocky.

Letting out an audible sigh, he felt the tight air in the room dispell. His chest was killing him and it felt a bit like his headache was coming back as well. He wondered if his mother still kept advil or tylonol in the bathroom mirror. Standing, he goes into the bathroom downstairs. Turning on the light, the tiny pink colored bathroom lit up before him. He looked at his reflection in the mirror for a second. It was like looking directly into the face of his alter who claimed to go by his ninja name. Since the night he had escaped, the manic boy was surprisingly silent. Rocky wondered if he were plotting something, somewhere in the depths of his mind there's a raw nerve active and waiting to unleash itself upon his family and friends; trying to bring horrible truths to his family and friends. He wouldn't allow it.

He had to keep his nerves calm and his mind centered. He will stop the voices from broadcasting theirselves for him to hear and he'll stop the radiating neurons that somehow managed to keep ejecting the cd's his mother played in the car, on their way home from the hospital, and the changing of the radio station. Jessica ended up turning it off all together. When they were in the hospital, she asked him over and over, how he was- if she could get him anything. In the end, he wanted a watch and she came back with a digital and a hand time telling watch. He wore them both. It was better that way. One might get broken and he needed to know what time it was- all the time. He was very glad that the digital had the date over it as he needed to check that as well.

Remembering why he came into the bathroom in the first place, he pulled open the mirror and reached for the bottle of asprin in the medicine cabinet. Popping the bottle open, he shook a tablet into his palm then tossed it into his mouth. Ducking his head under the faucet he turned on the water and took down a few full gulps. Wiping the back of his hand across his mouth, he stood up and quickly staggered back, banging into the door.

Holding a hand to his chest, he looked past his reflection at a dark shadow behind him, it faded just as quickly as he saw it. Shaking it off, he cursed his self for being born this way, and hoped that he could bury it like he had when he was a child. If not... maybe he wasn't as fine as he thought he was.


	2. Thoughtful People

A.N: Sorry for the late update. My computer wouldn't open because I have XP. But it seems fine today so here you go! And thank you so much for the review Coltx. I hope you like the story. And since I forgot this in the first chapter.

Warning: This fic contains slash, sex, nudity, langauge aaaand... adult content (shurg) Does anyone know what Color Tum's eyes are because I haven't got a clue? Hahaha. Thank for reading.

Chapter 2.

Rocky sat on the stairs. Stairs are good. Stairs are the intersection between upstairs and downstairs. So sitting on them meant he was everywhere. Back against the wall, knees pulled in, side view of everything. This is perfect for him. Maria never let him leave that room unless she wanted something from him, and he didn't know why _that_ mattered because he isn't there anymore! His mother is in the kitchen wiping the table off from lunch, soap and sandwiches. At first Rocky just stared down into the warm bowl of vegetable broth with delicious steaming things to eat and as a flashback consumed his mind in that brief moment of glaring, his mother tapped his shoulder jerking him out of thought before he violently slapped her hand away. A look of surprise was on his face before he snapped his gaze to his lap and said a very quiet. "Sorry, ma'am."

The green ninja ate lunch as quickly as he could then dashed out of the kitchen to sit on the stairs and be alone. When his brothers finished their lunches they walked into the living room, Colt going upstairs, Tum tum taking out a math book to do his homework. He wondered if his brothers had skipped school for a while when he went missing, but then he remembered that most of thos days were winter break he didn't think about it anymore. Every now and then Tum tum would glance at him, Rocky would have asked him if he wanted anything, had something been running through the boys head as he did it.

Since Tum's mind was blank, Rocky just assumed that he was looking at him as some sort of reality check- making sure his brother was really home and he wasn't just dreaming or something. After a while Colt came downstairs carrying a box in his hands. Rocky thought his first brother would keep going by, but when he paused at the same stair he was sitting sideways on, he tensed up.

"Here." He said in a calm, flat, tone.

Reaching out for the box, he looked at the top to see if it had any type of address to identify the person who had sent it. "What's this?"

Colt scratched the back of his neck with a shrug. "They started coming in when they found out you were back." He looked down at the step below him, then out at Tum Tum who was looking back with a cocked brow. "No one knew that you were in a comma so they're a little dated."

Rocky nodded. Placing the box on the stair beside him, he hugged his knees. "Thank you. I'll read them later."

Colt hesitated for a moment, then stood up. "I think you should read them now... One of them is from Emily."

"...E-..." He couldn't even get the girls name out all the way. Standing, he took the box into his bedroom, but left the door open.

Colt looked after him, even when he couldn't see him anymore. Walking slowly down the stairs, he crossed the living room to sit on the couch near his younger brother. "Tum tum, do you think I should have given Rocky that box right away."

"Seriously? No. Hearing from Emily might just piss him off if she says something stupid like I told you so, to Rocky hanging out with that Maria girl... But then again, she could make it worse by saying something stupid that's nice," he shrugged. "Either way, it was fucked up of her to write him after everything she put him through." Going back to his work, he cursed when the head of his pencil snapped. "Figures."

Colt thought about all the changes in Tum tum since this all happened. He became a bit more mature than the usual brat he's been his whole life- he complained a lot less too. The boy even ate less! That in itself was a horrifying discovery as the house actually started having leftovers in it. But Colt couldn't blame him, though. He had grown up and changed a bit from the first time that sick woman took their brother; Tum tum seemed to treat the situation like he had failed his brother because, as the oldest, Rocky has always looked out for them: getting them out of that cell when Synder had kidnapped them, helping out Jo the way he did by risking every bit of his life to help her family by driving a car at his age- well, actually with the way Rocky drove, Colt considered that to be kind of putting their lives at risk but through all of that, he couldn't ever remember doing anything for him. Who was there to watch over Rocky? It made Colt wonder if Tum tum could think _that_ deeply about things. Either way, he himself wanted to protect his brother from anymore danger, such as girls like Maria and shithead, perverts, like Robbie.

Colt couldn't forget that winter night when the male came over and told them what he had done to their brother. It was disgusting, uncalled for, and just flat out an ass kicking placed upon his head by anyone that found out and like Rocky even a shred. But what concerned Colt was that Rocky left afterwards. He scratched the side of his face; his brother only left bad situations when he wanted to think about it. Once he and Rocky had a fight over a girl, someone he can't currently remember, but either way Rocky had said something and Colt accussed him of being pathetic and unable to see past _one_ time when he really screwed up and hurt someone in the break-up. Rocky had been thinking for a very long time about it and when he finally came back, he told his brother that he just felt he had to protect people whether it was from Colt or anybody and after that he went back to normal.

Tum tum snapped his fingers in front of Colt's face. Making a face of question when he blinked, he swatted his brothers waving hand from his face. "Tum tum." He said in protest that the boy was being a little brat for 16 going on 17. Tum tum couldn't protect Rocky, the brat never grew up but as a ninja he has really good skill, Colt had to remember that.

"You're the one in la la land..." Turning back to his homework, he said in a small voice that sounded like he did when he was seven. "Do you think Rocky will really be ok?"

"If we keep him safe, sure... I don't really work well- emotionally." The word spit out of his mouth, but he meant it, he never really knew what to say. He could always _think_ really good but letting it out verbally- not so much.

Tum tum nodded with a smile on his face as if to say that he got that much from being his brother. "I'll do all that stuff and mom too-..."

"Don't be a dope. Rocky," he glanced over his shoulder at the top of the stairs. "doesn't really want mom's comfort right now. Didn't you notice how he kept jumping away from her touch and looked aggitated when she leaves it there." He made sure to lower his voice as he spoke, since his mother is still in the kitchen and might hear him. "Rocky might be having withdrawl from her because he feels betrayed somehow."

"From Mom?" Shaking his head, he stopped and stared after a bit. Rocky had only just gotten back from the hospital just a couple hours ago and so far he seemed to eat with hesitation, speak with hesitation and walk around like he were new to the place when he's lived here all his life. But most of all, he stared at their mother, he tried to do it in secret but Tum saw. He seemed to be following her around with his gaze as if he's waiting for her to do something to him- or maybe he's on gaurd of anyone touching him because of what happened. "I see what you mean."

"You try talking to him later, see if you can't get something out of him- after all," he shrugged. "Rocky always wanted us to talk whenever we had a problem, he probably wants to talk but is unsure of whether or not we want to hear it."

Giving his brother a thumbs up, he nods. "Got'cha."

Sighing, Colt looked at the stairs again. "I wonder if he got to Emily's letter yet. Wonder what she said."

Rocky dumps over the small box of what seemed to contain dozens of letters from people he may or may not know, then he began to weed through them all in search of Emily's. Deciding that putting them in a pile would be faster, he sorts through them.

_Linda. Amanda. Stacy. Ariel. Britney. Chelsea. Jo- Jo?_ He wondered if it were Jo Lightning and decided to place it in the 'immediate' pile. He then found one from Miyo Shikigawa, written in Kenji which let him know that it was the young girl from Japan he penpals with from time to time when taking Japanese lessons. That also went in the 'immediate' pile. _Beth. Patricia. Zoe._ Rocky had to take a step back at the sight of so many letters. _Who are all of these people?_ There must have been at least 30 letters from girls maybe two boys and all of them addressed to him. It was ridiculous! Shaking his head, letting curiousity get the better of him he picked one off the pile and opened it.

_Dear Rocky,_

Again another stranger using his ninja name. Sure he greets people around his age and younger that way but he remembers to tell them his first name always because Rocky meant that they were on a more personal level.

_I think you're completely adorible to have gotten away from that sick woman. I've never known anyone strong enough to get away from a captive situation and bring another person out of it with them, you're very brave! I think that if you get to know me, you and I can be friends and maybe you could protect me from a lonely night or two- if you get my hint._

Was this-? Flipping the note over he reads the envelope. Kyle, serious?! Last thing he wanted was some girl, whom he doesn't even know! trying to hit on him! Shaking his head he picks out another one, this one from a Jennifer.

"Dear Rocky, blah blah blah... if you know what I mean?" His eye twitched in frustration. Do all of these letters say the same thing?! He could just see these love struck girls taking a look at his face which had to be plastered over every inch of the city, due to the missing posters, and thinking- 'Boy! Isn't he good-looking! I wonder if he's seeing anybody?! It was sickening! And all the perfume scents kicking up off the damned things were giving him a headache! Or maybe the pill was wearing off- hard to say. Growling, he placed a hand to the side of his head and sorted through the letters again until he finally located the one from Emily.

Tearing it open in an almost hungry manner, he skimmed down the paper first, then read it over slowly. His blue eyes checking each and every word as if looking for something hidden with in them- though he wasn't sure what that something was.

_...Hey Sam, _this is new. Guess she out-grew his ninja name.

_I... I really don't know what to say at this point in time. I feel ashamed that I said what I said to you, and embarrassed that I never believed you when you said that woman was weird. It's just that, I was so jealous of the attention you were giving her, you care too much about wounded birds that... I didn't see past my jealousy to realize that something was wrong and I'm sorry._

_I'm so glad that your back at home- your mother brother, Mikey, called and told me. I'm coming to see you on the 18th of January. I think letters are a bit impersonal and... I just wanna see for myself that you're ok._

_Love always,_

_Emily._

Rocky blinked for a moment. Tum tum had called Emily. Since when did he have her number? Of course, it wasn't so hard to understand; Tum tum liked attention no matter where he got it and Emily doesn't hate him, he's just a kid. But still, her letter is impersonal and cold almost. He kind of wished that he had never read it. Then maybe he wouldn't feel this wad of bile creeping up into his throat. Covering his mouth with his hand, he swallows it back then composes himself.

"Relax Rocky. Peace, tranquility, calm." Closing his eyes he took a few deep breaths and waited for his nerves to settle. He is going to be ok. He _is_ fine. Opening his eyes, he picks up the letter from Jo and rips it open with shaking hands. This one had a lump inside of it, he shook it to the bed and examined it. It looked like- well, it is a small animal skin pouch that felt to be filled with some sort of powder. He peeked inside, sticking a finger in before pulling it out to look at curiously. "Purple powder?" Reading the note, he felt a smile creep onto his face- at least he hoped it looked like a smile because it feels like a strained grimace. Either way, Jo's words made him feel better.

She told him that what happened was the end of a bad time in his life, that no matter what happened from then on would all be up to him because he's stronger and can decide and accomplish his goals and personal destiny. The pouch, contains herbs and minerals for him to use to calm down any troubled thoughts that might have followed him home. He is to light a small amount in a container to remove the bad energy. Jo also said that the powder works just as good by simply wearing it and smelling it. This is a lovely gift. Looking at Miyo's the girl had little but enough to say: glad that he's home, glad that he's safe from harm and that he should come and visit someday. The other letters he had no interest in as he reminded his self that he would see to it that they found a proper place in the trash. Shoveling them all into the box they came in, he dropped it onto the side of the bed then lay back against the pillow and closed his eyes. His headache lifted slightly now that he was in a comfortable position.

Rocky wondered if he were going to go to sleep. Wondered if tired could be reached, sleeping accomplishable after what happened to him. Waking up nearly every night hearing the derranged woman laughing as she just got finished decicrating his sleeping body- just how many times had she taken him against his will until that final day when she placed that thing into his body? He didn't care to think about it, as he curled himself into the fetile position and hugged his knees to his chest. Rocky suddenly felt very exposed sitting out in the open, so he sat up and eased under the huge blanket on the queen sized bed. Curling like a caterpiller, he relaxed his tense nerves by humming a song he once heard as a child... Slowly, with each bit of the melody, words formed and came out of his mouth.

"Make me want to be with you, you're so beautiful, it's true. You're my baby and I love you... Best of all, even when you fall." Where had he heard such a song, and whose voice was singing it in his head just now because he knows he doesn't mentally sing like a girl. Trying to remember the rest of the song his mind clouded and turned in another direction.

"Hello Samuel," said Maria before the image snapped and she broke into a fit of laughter. "I can't help but wonder what I taste like!" She continued to laugh as the image faded into his memories; blank being replaced with color, as nothing but that fallen Donatello came into view.

Rocky growled, knowing that his pleagued mind wouldn't get any sleep. Realizing the dark room wasn't going to give him any peace, he got up from the bed and pulled the light cotton, blue, curtains over to let in the sunlight. Big mistake. The news team was joined by other local news channels vans and crew and all of them were lining the street on Sunset st. Not only that, but there is a group of teens outside with them! Getting interviews and holding up signs that said things like: We love you Rocky! You're so brave! Please don't forget about me! Rock' you rock! and other dumb things. When they saw the curtains move, all attention went up to the window that he's looking out of. The green ninja backed away with caution of them seeing him but it was too late as they all pointed and tried to get their voices heard.

"We love you!"

"Please call me, Rocky!"

He heard the reporters screaming for an interview to get information of what it was like inside the bombshelter. Those animals! What was it like?! What was it like! It was fucking hell! Everyday wondering if the insane bitch would finally snap and release you from hell by killing you! Oh the girls would_ love_ to hear that. And he's disturbed! That means he's eager for a relationship that's kind and caring. No, the underlining of that sentence is they think he's ready to prove he isn't a wimp by having sex with them. Think again. He's _never_ going to give his body to _anyone_, _ever again_!

All the peoples cries suddenly became over bearing and he backed quickly away from the open window. "Mom! Mom!"

Jessica came running as if she were already on the stairs just waiting for her son to call her. "Rocky, what is it?" She asked before seeing the open curtain. Stalking across the room she snapped the curtains shut, then turned around with a sigh. "I'm sorry, baby. You shouldn't have to be subjected to that. It's your first day home and those damned animals know better than that."

Standing as though he were in his own little world and his mothers frantic speech. Looking down at the floor to avoid eye contact, he takes in a breath then sighs it out. "Why are they doing this? Can't they understand that I don't wanna talk? Or at least that, I'm not ready."

"I know, I know. I can't send them away, the reporters think they have right of passage because they're the media." She hold up a hand as if to apologize. "The others need to go, and I'm sure that once your father gets home he'll see to it that they leave."

Rocky nodded. "Mom, do we have any sleeping pills?"

Jessica cocked her head at that, then shook it. "No. But I can get you some, if you'd like?"

"Mom please, stop asking me about things that I like. I don't care either way about anything, not what we eat, not what we drink, or even if we have meds in the house." Walking back over to the bed, he takes a seat. "Know that when I say things I'm just asking."

Nodding to show she understood, Jessica walked over to him and sat down beside her son. "Rocky... I... I don't want you to be unhappy- I've seen people on the news and in newspapers and such and... I just don't want you to feel like you're different because you're not. You're the same person you always have been and always will be. Even if it takes a while." She reached out to touch his out-grown hair, smoothing a stray strand behind his ear for him, much to his displeasure. "Okay? We all love you."

"I know." It was a flat response as if the reply meant nothing at all. "I wanna take a nap before dinner. Can I?"

His mother had tears in her eyes. The way her son is speaking, she can tell that, even though he's trying to hide the majority of it, he is truly traumatized by all of this. She didn't blame him for it, but she would like to understand but felt she had no place to ask. But thanks to news clippings and the internet, she knew what to look out for with trauma victims, such as: sudden need for secrecy, the wearing of long sleeved shirts because it meant that the victim is hiding cuts, and a sudden lack of coherance because they might be thinking about suicide. She prayed her son didn't fall into that, and the most he does is remain to himself. But even with this, she thought about therapy for him. If anything got out of her hands, she had a doctor already waiting to see the family and Jessica hoped that Rocky would participate.

"What are we having?" Asked Rocky for what sounded like the third time.

"Hm?"

"For dinner? What are we having?"

The question was so unexpected and asked so sweetly that Jessica had to laugh. Rocky smiled and choked kind of chuckle came from him as well. Jessica laughed a little longer than she wanted to, but Rocky didn't make her feel awkward about it, he just kept a smile on until she was finished.

"Apperantly we're having a casarole of some kind." She was referred to what Ms. Carole said outside about bringing dinner over.

"Oh... Don't let her stay too long." He warned, knowing that once inside the woman would try her hardest to get to him and he _does not_ want to be touched.

"I won't sweetheart." Leaning over, she pressed a kiss to the side of her sons head then stood to leave. Looking back over her shoulder, she smiled sadly. "Rocky?" Seeing his head turn slightly to give her an ear, she continued. "I'm gonna go to the pharmacy and get you those pills, because I want to." She added incase he insisted that she didn't and then she was gone.

"Leave the door open, please." He asked when he heard the creaking of it during her departure.

"Okay."

Waiting for his mother's complete departure down the stairs, he then lied down on the bed, sideways, until he realized that his back was exposed so he turned on to his stomach, that would be okay. But then he realized that his back was still exposed, so he then turned onto said back to avoid the conflict all together.

"Geez. Since when was my back so important to protect-," he smirked with malice. "It's not as if I'm gonna be raped in my own home by some fucking toy." He had to laugh at that, for what his laugh was now worth in length, pitch, and sound. Rocky stared up at the ceiling, a smooth white canvace- not like his dank cell with its stoney color and feel. The house feels warmer too, like they had turned on the heating system or something. It's nice. He wondered if he maybe he could actually go to sleep on his own. Closing his eyes, he smiled. He could smell the powder in the sack that Jo had given him. It's nice. Everything is nice.

_Peace, tranquility, calm. Peace, tranquility, calm_. He repeats in chant. These things he could trust now that he's out. These things he can believe in. A sudden knock on the door frame jarred the male out of his thoughts. In fact, because it was so sudden, he jumped hard enough to cause his insides to tremble. Turning his head to see who could have done such an evil thing to him, he calmed his rage when seeing his little brother standing in the doorway.

"Mom's going out." He walked in.

Rocky sat up quickly, pressing his back to the headboard. "I know."

"I thought that, maybe we could talk you and me... About what happened?" When he got to the bed, he paused. "May I?"

Rocky nodded, scooting over to give himself room rather than his brother. He wasn't as guarded around men or boys as he is woman. Even though he knows its his own mother. It still... felt weird. There was a long awkward silence between them; just when Rocky was about to ask him if he was going to say something, his little brother spoke up.

"Are you really ok?"

Rocky nodded. "Why wouldn't I be? I'm home."

"Yeah but, you don't seem like you're really in there."

Truth to the matter was, Rocky wasn't sure if he was 'in there' as his brother phrased it. But what was he supposed to do? He missed three and a half months of his life because of that woman. He has no new news, nothing really to speak of. Just... Darkness. Loneliness. Pain.

Tum tum looked at his brother sideways, then coughed to bring him back to the bedroom. "You can talk to me about it. I'm always here and I'll listen to you."

"That isn't necessary, I'm fine." Adjusting his seating a bit, he looks his brother over. "You look well. How have you been?" He changed the subject and Tum tum knew it. But he went along with it.

"I'm better now that you're back. Really. I'm gonna take my driving test this weekend, I kept reschueduling because it didn't feel right doing something like that with the way things were." Rocky nods. "We didn't celebrate any holidays with you gone, nothing mattered but you- you do know that right?"

"I'm starting to." He smiled. He hated to admit it, but Rocky kind of thought that he would just end up as another missing person and that would be that, but he was found- mostly on his own but his parents were there, he can remember that much.

"Tum tum, what happened. I mean, how did you guys finally find me?"

Tum tum looked at his lap, hesitant to answer, which meant it would either be bad or Rocky just wouldn't like it. He didn't push the answer just waited to see if he would get one. When his little brother finally spoke, he sounded like he were ashamed for some reason.

"You know your roommate Robbie?" Rocky nods so Tum went on. "He found out. He went to see his aunt in Canada and he found these pajamas in the snow."

Rocky knew of those pajamas, they were ripped off of him that night he tried to escape but failed and ended up being dragged back to the woman's home. He couldn't believe Robbie, in the end, had helped him.

"We got the blood tested but that took a while, luckily, Robbie had put up a flyer in the dinner out there and the watress that worked there called and said that she had seen you." He swallowed hard a moment. "The cops found your car by that supermarket, there were hairs inside that weren't yours that pointed us in the direction of some woman name-..."

"Marissa Balsam."

"Uh huh, Robbie told us that she's his aunt. But Rocky, Colt and me thought that Maria had taken you because she-..."

"She did take me... It was her but it wasn't at the same time." He looked at his brother, blue eyes on honey brown. Tum tum made a face when he looked into his brothers eyes. He could have sworn that they were blue green- but eh, it must be the dark lighting in the room. Shaking his head to sort through the right way to explain it, he just said what he knew. "Tum tum, the Maria we've seen back then was nothing more than a mask that she put up around herself to hide who she really was. I've seen her once before when I went to Maria's fake house, she gave me a ride home- God, she could have taken me right then. But her anger that I didn't recognize her made her hit me over the head and leave me at home."

"What do you mean? Where did you see her before?"

Knowing he could never tell his brother about what happened in the dressing room, he shook his head, disgruntled. "Just... AROUND. It doesn't really matter, but I did. And she hated me for not remembering."

"So that's why she took you- so you could remember her?"

Shrugging, Rocky looked away. He really didn't know the truth about anything anymore. He just knows that he's fine. "Maria... wanted me because she thinks we're alike. She wanted to be with people who got her I guess. That's why she took Noelie... But when she found out I wasn't gonna give into her, she flipped out." Simple as that.

Tum tum nodded, then stood up. He could tell that Rocky was uncomfortable with this so he wanted to give him his privacy. "I... Thanks for talking to me, if you ever want to again. I'm here."

"Thank you."

Smiling, he gave a hard nod then walked to the door. "And don't worry, I'll take care of those reporters." He had mischief in his voice.

Rocky smiled and said. "Give them hell."

A thumbs up flashed his way then the boy was gone. Rocky lay down on the bed again, closing his eyes. He had a lot to think about since his mind was busy churning over everything he just said. Why did Maria want him so badly? Surely she knew he didn't like her and never would. But, there was something more to the way she spoke. Like she owned him from before... He never felt sleep take over, and he didn't expect the dream that came during.


	3. Unspoken Memories

A.N: I'm so guilty! I can't remember the other victims names if I said them at all. Sorry. So I might accidently controdict myself a bit because the site is having issues still with XP users so all I can do is update I don't get the chance to go over my old gics for info but I'll do my best. First chapters are always the hardest never any plot within them just quick info ya know what mean? Enjoy the chapter! Lighter.

Chapter 3.

_Rocky is playing out in the park. He can tell what time this is; November 13, 1994. He just turned eight and wanted to play with his new birthday gift. The park was cool since winds were coming in from Texas giving them some kind of fall other than hot._

_"Turtle power!" Yelled the child, bringing his toy into the air before crashing him down on a ple of sticks that he was using as foot soldiers. Their parents didn't want to buy them the villans of the show, thinking they were too young to play violent games, so the boys settled for anything they could find as a substatute. "Ahahaha." He loved his toys, every one of them. He almost considered them to be like a second family to him- but he isn't crazy or anything, he just likes to play pretend._

_**What are you doing, Sammy? **Asked the voice in his head, a boy; he looks like him, acts like him, and always comes to play with him. _

_Sam had met the boy one day, he just showed up out of nowhere and asked to play with him. How could he not agree to such a friendly request? The only difference is that the boy has dark green eyes as apposed to his which are a mix of both green and blue. Another difference is the way he talks. His friend can be a little brash, and almost lewd; alot of the times he was talking about yucky things like body parts and such, but when he wasn't he is a lot of fun._

_**I thought we were gonna throw rocks some more. Remember? You promised.** He almost had a visible pout to his voice. Among other things, his new friend could be a bit of a drama-queen and damanding. **I'll bet you hate me now, that's why you don't wanna play with me anymore.**_

_That got Sam to stop ignoring the boy. He has few friends that know about his abilities and- even though his friend is purely made up, he still likes that he has someone to come to about it. "That's not true, Sin. I like playing with you." Placing Leonardo down- since his mother bought him that one particular turtle in every version they advertized. _

_Sam had always wanted Donatello but, he didn't have the heart to tell his mother since she thought that Leo best suited his self. She thought Jeffrey was a good match with Raphael, and that Michael was just an adorible little Michaelangelo but he is too young to play with toys any other way than to scream really loud about everything they say and no one can handle that kind of noise for too long so the young boy usually played alone. But enough of the time Sam plays with him._

_**Than let's toss rocks.** The boy tried again. Using their abilities is Sin's favorite pass time, he says it a waste to let them dull by trying to be normal. Plus, it's boring! And he's all about having fun._

_"Okay, okay." Cranning his neck to locate a rock, he looked to where his mentally visible friend is sitting beside him, pointing a finger out at the distance. "I see it." Concentrating on the mineral object, it shook a bit then shot out toward him. Raising a hand, the young boy caught it with ease. "You throw it first and I'll bring it back."_

_**Okay.** Effortlessly, his imaginary friend shot the rock across the park, shoving it nearly through the large slab of cement. The two boys burst into laughter at their private games._

_"I'll bring it back." Sam began to focus on the rock, but it shot off in another direction instead. Confused, he looked to where the rock had gone to see one of the others holding it within its dark, smoking hand. Sam felt a tremendace amount of fear building inside of him. He thought that the others had stopped showing up. He wasn't afraid of them, but he was very concerned at why he was seeing them at all. Being a secret psychic is one thing, but seeing the dead is a nightmare._

_Sin stood up and stepped infront of him as if to block him from the shadow. **Don't worry, I'll protect you again.**_

The dream faded just as suddenly as it had come. Rocky opened his eyes slowly looking out into the darkness of the bedroom. For a brief moment-...

"No!" He sprang up from the bed. His head hurt, eyes barely focused as he looked around the room. His blue eyes darting this way and that. He was sure that he was back in Maria's tomb of a basement, but the moon showed through the semi-slitted blinds telling him otherwise. The bedroom door is also open, letting in light from the hall, but the room is so _still_ that he'd swear someone is inside with him, trying to eat the light away with their very exsistance. He's felt this way before; so insecure. As a child, he used to see _the others_ a lot. They used to come into his room and talk to him, take him places. They said, he had to take them to the other side, he was the only one that could since he can see them and the border between this world and the next. But there was one... one that felt like it didn't belong with the rest of them, one that looked at him funny, talked to him differently, was never looking to pass on- just be around him. Rocky was afraid of that one, and he feels his fear is coming back and with that fear it shall return.

"You're finally awake."

Rocky jumped out of his skin at the sudden voice. Why do people insist on surprising him? Were things always gonna be like this? He felt slight buzzes floating through the air that represented his family, he knew that much, but he couldn't tell how close they were to him. Maria had promised to teach him honing, but all she wanted was sex and every now and then she would show him how to-...

_Stop it! Stop thinking about her!_ He barked the order to himself. Turning to see his mother at the door, bowl in her hands filled with dinner. She stepped into the room and turned on the bedside lamp.

"Are you ok?"

Unsure of his voice, he merely nods, taking the bowl from her before she could set it down. "Thank you."

Jessica made a sound that replaced the 'you're welcome'. Her hand reached out, touching the side of his face. He wanted to let her do it, he really did but... He moved away. He just does not want to be touched. How can she not understand that? Deflated, Jessica gets up from the bed, and walks out the door. Rocky watched her go, then slid out of bed and followed after.

The living room is quiet for the most part. His brothers doing nothing more than sitting on the couch watching television. Homer Simpson flipped over in his hammock when a swarm of bees attacked him for a wad of candy around his head. Tum tum started to laugh but Colt slapped the boy on his hip to silence him upon seeing Rocky. Taking a seat on the floor in front of the coffee table, he finishes the rest of his meal. He honestly didn't think he'd like anyone elses cooking aside from his mothers but the neighbor actually has a good sense of taste and everything is well seasoned. Placing his fork down, he looked around a bit more. It's dark out, he knows that much but what time is it? He went to sleep at twelve for crying out loud. The wall-clock read: 8:40 p.m.

_8:40!?_ He couldn't believe it! "I've been asleep for nine hours!" He declared, scaring everyone in the room causing them to jump a bit.

Jessica opened her mouth, but snapped it shut, like a fish out of water. "...Sweet heart, I let you sleep because I thought that you really needed it. You just came back from the hospital, so assumed that the meds had put you down."

"...Oh." Was all he could say.

Flipping channels once the show had ended, Tum tum stopped as he searched for something new to watch pausing just long enough on a new channel for them to hear what would be talked about next.

"This is Nina Post with the channel 4 news and we have exclusive news about the victims in the abduction of about six or seven vitims in a Canadian woman's home." She tapped papers on her desk. "Also we have news about-..." Tum tum changed the channel.

"Tum turn it back. I wanna watch that." Rocky was shocked at first, wondering where the hell the media got this so-called story of theirs. But then he realized that they must have forced that poor girl to talk- well, _sign_ to someone who could translate for her. Those bastards! Rocky felt sick, how could they harrass a little girl to admit something so horrible to the public- make her explote herself like that!

The news spoke about a lot of boring crap at first: Pregnant teens that run away and dump off their babies before returning home, hoping that they're in no trouble from their parents, strays becoming a problem in one area of L.A., boring junk about pageant winners and how they stay so fit during deration. Then finally around 9:45 they started talking about the abduction.

Nina flipped a strand of hair behind her ear before looking into the camera, face serious, then she spoke. "Canadian police have told us a bit about this mystery woman that took it upon herself to abduct several youths and a young adult right from their homes or the streets. A young boy, Alfonse Mansfield, died a horrible death by burning to death attached to the very woman who had taken them all. An act of bravery, or perhaps the boy was merely trying to shove her out of the way and failed? We're uncertain but the others down in the basement all young boys under the age of 17 died in very severe manner as well. One drowned, one starved to death, the other died with a large shard of glass in his neck-..."

As she went on Rocky swallowed remembering that horrible night when the house had burnt down, when he had met them all his first month there. Passing by all their cell doors, seeing nothing but a picture of them hanging on the wall like some type of shrine to their memory. This is insane, can they really talk this violently on the news?

"The only survivors were a young girl age eight by the name of Noelie Gonsolas, and the hero of this tale Samuel 'Rocky' Douglas. The young man that risked his life to save the young girl and all the other members of the house of torture. We have no words from the young male, but Noelie has opened up to us about the experience and here is the footage from earlier today."

The shot switches to a small home somewhere in the city. Pink curtains shade the blinding sun from their eyes, pink wall paper with flowers sprinkled here and there. The living room was done up like a strawberry sunday crunch that you would get from the ice cream man. Pinks, cremes and white. On the couch sits a very proud looking family, hugging their nervous expressioned daughter. It sure didn't look like she wanted this interview. Rocky moved closer to the tv. His family exchanging looks, all thinking that this was a bad idea.

"Just speak from the heart Noelie." Said a man with a microphone. He must have been the other reporter they had sent out since Nina was standing guard at the Douglas home nearly all day. Rocky had yet to find out how his little brother had gotten rid of them but he would ask later.

The little girl began to sign what she wanted to say, hands moving quickly as a woman translated it for her. But Rocky already knew what she was saying.

"It was scary, but... it felt better when Rocky was there. He was so nice to me and made me feel safe. Rocky hugged me and took good care of me whenever Marissa let him see me."

"Would you say that you're in love with him?" The man asked.

"What the hell kind of question is that?" Colt snaps.

Noelie shook her head rapidly. "Rocky is like my brother now. I love him, but he's not my boyfriend."

The people in the room laughed at that. Rocky didn't see what was so funny about it. Poor thing is like a side-show freak in a circus! He wanted to go to the news building and give those assholes a piece of his mind for bothering the poor girl because truth be told after what they went through he thinks of her as a little sister.

"Speaking of brother, do you know that the police found your hair on his body? Police thought that he was the one that had taken you. Can you clear that up for us?"

"It wasn't Rocky. He was there but, he wasn't Rocky."

Rocky remembered what Maria had told him about that night when he was lured from the club to her hotel room and he also recalled his alter telling him another version as to why _he_, not Rocky, chopped the girls hair off.

"I don't understand, was someone else in the room?" Asks the reporter.

Noelie's mother rubbed her daughters shoulds, obviously remembering when she was taken exactly. he young girl bit her lip as if deciding whether or not she wanted to tell them. Deciding not to, Rocky could tell, she changed subjects. "Marissa took me one day when I was at school-..."

Rocky stopped listening after that, a cold chill ran down his spine from the girls words. Taken... at school... without meaning to he began to shake. He pulled himself into his arms feeling his stomach go cold, terror built inside of him until it vanished just as quickly as it had come. Rocky didn't have to look around to know that the whole family was looking at him, who wouldn't, he could feel himself whimpering softly as the shaking went on. But with luck, no one asked him what was wrong so he excused his self, saying that he was cold and wanted to sleep again. But he didn't know that he wasn't exactly going to sleep- not tonight anyway.


	4. A Brief Moment With a Headcase

Chapter 4.

Rocky tottered along the streets of L.A. looking for something to do or someone to play with. He was bored just walking around in the cool night air, that didn't match the hot morning. It wasn't hard slipping past the media who have camped outside of the Douglas home since Rocky had gotten home today. Pathetic losers. Couldn't they just leave his charge alone? Hasn't he been through enough without having to re-live it for the public just so they can be reminded of how sick human beings really are? He didn't think so. Speaking of which, _Sin_ not Rocky was getting good and sick of using his charges sappy little ninja name and decided to go back to his own. Which is why he gifted his childhood buddy with that little dream- if he even bothered to take the hint that Rocky was a borrowed name so that sweet Sam wouldn't go even more insane due to the fact that he has an alternate personality.

Chuckling, he had to shake his head and laugh. _Stupid. Couldn't he see that I was just trying to help him, but he's always thinking of others- why does he think that he was there for so long?! Probably doesn't even know how long he and I have been friends, doesn't even care as long as he doesn't have to face the truth..._

Looking up he stops walking. Cocking his head, a smile stretches across his face as he reads the neon sign before him. _Sweeeeet!!! Dancing, drinks and fun!!_ He couldn't have approached the door faster. Just as he moved toward the door, a large man stopped him dead in his tracks. Straightening up, he turns his nose into air while tugging his crumpled shirt down. "Problem, chubs?"

Narrowing his already, mousey, small eyes at the young boy, he grins. "Where do you think you're going, little man."

"Iiiii think I'm going dancing, but you're kind of in my way."

Laughing, the man tapped a clipboard. "Look boy, you got i.d.? Can't get in here if you're underaged."

"I'm 20."

"Hahaha. You gotta be 21 to get in here."

"...Really? Well that's a shame, guy like me could really bring in some business- not to mention how much _your_ paycheck will come up because of it."

"Oh really."

"Yes, really!" Crossing his arms, he smirks. "Iiiii am like royality. Everything I touch turns to gold, why just the other day-..."

"Move it along, little man, if you're underage you don't get in."

"But that's not fair!"

With a shrug he says. "Those are the rules."

"Hmph." Stepping aside for a man that just flashed his i.d. another person that showed off a stamp. Pout as deep as the Grand Canyon, he suddenly has an idea. "Tell you what chubs, if I can guess your name and something personal about you you'll let me in. If I can't you'll, unfortunately, never see this gorgeous face again."

The man had to laugh at that. "You really wanna get in here, huh."

"Yeeeeeesssssss." He whined like a child; knees bending and straightening like a child about to have a hissy fit.

"Alright. Try."

"Great. And don't lie if I get it right either." Looking into the mans eyes for the first time, he can feel only his brain waves, like pudding dropped in thick mud were suddenly being dropped over him. Flashes of the man, childhood, teen years, adulthood all coming into focus before his eyes. "...When you were a boy you were much thinner." He said, voice as serious as a doctor telling the family someone they love has just died. "You started gaining that weight when your first wife left you Bruce." Sin felt a tear forming in his own eyes feeling the pain that suddenly poured through Bruces heart. Pulling back he struggled to catch his breath, feeling dizzy and numb. It's never easy going into other peoples minds. Just picking up conversation of everyday thought, that's nothing. But having to share waves with someone is a nightmare.

Bruce was quiet for a while, missing all the people that were just going by without showing i.d. or such. Cocking his head, he wondered if he should just slip in as well. He wanted to have some fun before he had to go back home and let the crybaby take over again.

"Yoo hoo! Brucie! You in there?" Slapping a hand on the mans shoulder, he shook him a bit wondering if he hurt him on the pull out. "You in there?"

"I haven't thought about Leanne since 2000... She was so beautiful- she's got three kids now with her new husband..."

"Touching." He said, bored as all hell with this.

"Go on in, short man. But uh, watch yourself okay."

"What for?"

Scoffing with humor in his voice. "Cute guy like you might make a lot of unwanted friends."

"I'll keep that in mind."

"You do that." As Sin walked in the man called out to him. "And don't worry, if anyone gives you trouble, old Bruce will help you out. You got that."

Waving a hand to him, he blew a kiss. "Thanks." Finally inside, Sin made his way to the dance floor and just let himself have at it. Arms flailing, head going, bringing out dances that shouldn't even be allowed to do anymore as this is the 21 century, but what would Sin know? He's been shackled for ages inside that twit Rocky once the boy somehow managed to unknowingly build a cage around him. But in his own little world, as he often is, he was having a blast!

Three men watch him from the distance, not exactly digging his dance style but loving the package that it's coming from. One a brunet, short cut and slightly taller than the other two lowered his sunglasses to get a better look at the spektical before them. "Ooooh, what is he doing?"

"I'm not sure." Says a blond male, drink in his hand. "I think he's having a heart attack."

His friends laugh at that. The third man, dark hair, pushes from the counter to walk over to the odd new kid. "Let's go make a friend. Or at least clue him in to what year this is."

The three men walk over to Sin. The dark haired males hand came up, ready to tape the younger boy on the shoulder until he turned around. Smiling, he slipped his hand into his pocket. "Uuuhhh," he started in a stammer.

"You gonna oggle me all night or do you wanna dance?"

"Sure!" Chirps the brunet.

Sin grins at him, sliding his arms around the mans shoulders. Lining their crotches, he leads them in a dance called the 'Cobra'. All three men were left speechless, not sure whether the kid was some kind of weirdo, or if he just danced alone like a tool to lure people over- but whichever it was, the end result was a sight to see. His body moved so well, almost like he were in the middle of sex, cheek landing on his partners shoulder as if he needed to take a grip because the feeling was becoming too strong. Looking over his partners shoulder, he gestures with his finger for the short blond to come over and dance with them as well. Unsure, he hands his drink to the dark haired male, then comes up behind Sin so the three of them could heat the floor up.

Rocky began to moan in his sleep, back arching from the bed. His eyes scrunch, as if he were going through a dream and struggling to get out; the noise was so loud it alerted Jessica and the rest of the family to his room.

"Stop it please!" He yelled in broken words. Head shaking in protest, he rolls over, ready to scream again. "I don't! I don't want this!" Still asleep, Rocky gathered the sheet and scrambled from the bed into the corner of the room.

"Rocky!" Tum tum called out to his brother, ready to run to his side.

"Jessica," Sam said, touching his wifes elbow.

Snapping out of her daze, she crossed the room to her son. "Rocky, Rocky!"

"Get away from me!" He kicked her in the stomach, landing it perfectly, knocking his mother into the bed.

Sam rushed to his wifes side, ready to knock some sense into his son when he noticed that the boys eyes weren't even open. _He's having a nightmare._

"Rocky," Tum tum tried again. He crouched down, scooting over to his brother, careful not to yell at him. He knew it was bad to wake up sleepwalkers, especially when they're having a nightmare. Watching t.v. isn't as bad as people say.

Colt remained at the door, staring at the whole scene in complete confusion and fear. He doesn't like seeing this first hand. When Paula snapped, she had been away from the family at the time, he only saw the start of it when she began to stare into space but this... this is just freaky! At least Tum was handling it.

"Jessica are you ok?" Their father asked their mother.

The dark haired woman was still caughing, out of breath from the kick but she wasn't as hurt as she might be if her son had done that consciously. But the thing that hurt her more is watching her son in this much pain. Especially because this seems like a memory, a memory of a...

"I'm sORRY!" He shouted the end as if he had suddenly been struck on the head. Curled in the corner, sheet still over him, he began to undress!

Panicking that his brother was about to do a strip tease right before their eyes, Tum tum grabbed him from behind and shook him gently. "Rocky... Rocky it's us. Wake up." His brother is sobbing now, still trying to remove his sweat clothes. "Rocky, it's Tum... Can you hear me?" He kept his voice quiet and calm.

His brothers breathing went back to normal, his movement fully stopped. "...I want her to go."

"She's not here, Rocky. Maria is dead."

Shaking his head, he looks over his shoulder at his mother. "Her. I want her to go." He whispered something as he turned his gaze back to the wall.

"Now listen here-..." Sam began, but Jessica stopped him.

Standing, she walks out of the room, looking back once at her troubled son. Sam was at wits end with this. Rocky had just gotten back and he hasn't yet accepted that he's safe. He's home and safe and no one will get him. Why doesn't he seem to want to grasp that!

Rubbing his brothers back, Tum asked. "Are you ok?"

"I'm fine!" Lowering his voice, he repeats it. "I'm fine. Please, just forget what you saw, I wanna go back to sleep."

"But Rocky-..."

"Leave!"

Not sure what else to do, they backed out of the room being sure to leave the door open for him as he would want. Returning to their own rooms, Sam wasn't surprised to find that his wife is crying in their bed. Walking over to her, he wraps his arms around her receiving the same.

"Honey, it'll be ok."

"He hates me Sam... Our son, my Rocky, hates me." Sniffling, she shakes her head. "How can... I go on knowing this... How can I live knowing that he blames me for what happened to him."

"He doesn't blame you Jess' that's insane... he's probably just upset that..." Sam doesn't know. He doesn't know what to make of his son's condition. Nothing seems to be right to him. "Maybe, what he needs is to see Mori. He always knows what to do with the kids."

"But I should know Sam... He's our son, he always listened to me... I can't lose him, Sam. I can't."

If she didn't want Mori to talk to him, than what? "...We could send him to a shrink- one that works with trauma, you know, we could get in on a session and see what the problem is."

Shaking her head, she knows that won't work. "Sam, Rocky would never got for that and you know it. He thinks that those people make problems worse and I think he's right." Letting him go so she can look into his eyes, she says. "I'm afraid for him though, if he doesn't get help... What will become of him."

"I know."

"We'll try Dad, and if that doesn't work than... maybe a shrink would be best."

Caressing her grown-out hair, he hugs her close. "Everything is gonna work out. It's only been one day, things take time."

Nodding, she wipes her eyes with the back of her hand. "I'm gonna go clean up."

"I'll get it." Standing, he heads for the bathroom.

_I think that I'm really the one who's afraid of the therapy. Afraid that what I suspect will be confirmed..._ Getting into bedm blanket pooled around her, she leans against the headboard. _I can't handle it if I find out that my son hates me._


	5. Who Can Take Away the Pain?

A.N: Thank you so much for the review Ethan, it made my day! I hope to continue hearing your opinion being a boy and all, you don't see many reading things such as this. Thank you all who are reading I hope you continue to and I hope you like it. Nellie a.k.a. Lighter.

Chapter 5.

_Monday._

Rocky had brought his self downstairs that morning to find everyone in a hurry to leave. At first he wondered what the hell was going on but then he realized that it was a weekday and his brothers would be off to school. His mother, though, was the shocker. Her hair is tied in a bun, she's wearing one of her rwo piece suits. Did she really intend to go into work today? Well, who could blame her with the way he has been acting toward her. But how could he not? It's embarrassing to have to let his family know what happened to him- he was surprised that the hospital asked him about having sex with the woman instead of poking and proding around his body to find out for themselves. I guess they figured since he's male it wasn't possible that any harm came out of it- aside pychological if the woman did have sex with him. If they only knew. When he walked into the kitchen, he sat down at the table and just observed everyone, kind of like he weren't really there.

Colt is having pancakes, drenched in syrup; Tum tum sitting across from him is having the same thing with at least half a bottle of the sticky sweet condoment poured on top. Personally, Rocky likes only a little syrup, finding the taste to be too sweet to want anymore than a light drizzle. His mother is chewing on toast that she carries in her hand while going through her briefcase. His father must have already left. Wait a second...

_If everyone is leaving than that means-..._ "Mom. Are you really going to work?"

Jessica froze like she were a dear with the headlights of a car shining in her face. Her son spoke to her in a tone that was gentle and sweet. Her son. Her Rocky. She crossed the kitchen, ready to hug him as she wanted to since she brought him home the other day, but when he recoiled, turning his gaze to his lap she knew that the moment was over. Shrinking away, Jessica ran a hand through her bangs then grabbed her briefcase from the counter.

"I need to, sweetheart, but I got you a babysitter-.." she bit her tongue on the term she had used. But she didn't know what else to call him.

Colt stifled a laugh, which earned him a slap on the shoulder from his younger brother and a glare from his mom. Shrugging, he picked up his plate placing it into the sink. He had to go before the bus came. Tum tum had at least a half hour wait left, but the boy could never pass up a hot breakfast, he couldn't pass up a cold one either seeing as how he has a finished bowl of cereal beside his now empty plate.

"Sorry, Rock'." His sarcastic brother chided.

"Forget about it." He said, already having done so. He was just glad that someone planned to treat him normally. Rocky knew that he might have little quirks about him, but that didn't mean everyone had to get all weird whenever he came into a room. He may as well have stayed with Mari-... _Stop thinking like that. There is nothing wrong with me!_ He coached his emotions to remain calm, he ordered his self to act normal but it's hard! Harder than he thought. And he's so tired, he's not even sure how he managed to get up at _six fifteen_. He was sure it wasn't that late when he had fallen asleep last night, so why is he tired. Not to mention when he woke up, he could smell the scent of someone unfamiliar in the air. It was weird.

_Maria is dead. Dead. That scent in the room... it isn't like when she broke in. It's nothing alike... That was just a bad feeling and smell in the air. It could have been a burnt pancake for all I know._

"He should be here." Says their mother checking her watch.

The door bell rang just then, alerting all attention to it. Colt, already heading that way, pulled it open and the shock caused his jaw to drop. "Grandpa!" He declared, wrapping his arms around the elderly, but still in his prime, man.

"Colt!" He laughed with glee. "How are you doing? I would have come sooner but," he steps inside once his fast and free ninja grandson let him go. "I didn't know whether or not your father would want me and my bad influence around."

Colt had to laugh at that. Mori and Sam have been verbel rivals for sometime now and though they're friends the two still spar with words whenever they can. Tum tum walked into the living room then rushed over to his grandfather, throwing his arms around him.

"Grandpa, what are you doing here? It's not summer time yet."

"Is that all I am to you, ninja training?" He teased. "What's with the mob scene out there?"

Looking past them out the large window, Colt waves a hand. "The press wants a story from Rocky, which they aren't gonna get, but try telling them that and they bring in another news team."

"I see."

Tum tum shrugged. "You should have seen me douse 'em with water the first day, they freaked out when I almost got one of their camera's."

Mori chuckled, ruffling the boys hair. Having the man here now is still kind of a shock to the youngest Douglas boy sinec his grandfather visited from time to time but this was unexpected- sort of, because now that he thought about it, he was pretty sure that the elderly man was here for his brother.

"I came to look after Rocky while you're all away." He finally explained.

"Oh cool. Hey Rocky, grandpa's here!" He calls to his older brother, who has yet to leave the kitchen.

"I'll go and see him." Says Mori, patting Tum on the shoulder as if to tell him to let go.

"Bye grandpa." Colt says walking out of the house shielding his eyes from the flash bulbs going off. It was kind of like being a celebraty with all the lights going off against the, dimly lit, morning sky.

"Bye."

"I'm going in a half hour," explained the boy who often speaks with his stomach before he dashes upstairs to get his bag ready.

Mori watched him go with a smile at his youth. Heading for the kitchen once the boy is out of sight, he sees his oldest grandson sitting at the kitchen table, head down, knees pulled up; he certainly doesn't ressemble the boy he named _Rocky_ to say that he is strong and solid, cool as granite rock. Not to say that he is the opposite, but to say that his grandson is truly suffering and needs his help. It was a good thing Jessica had called him. Taking a seat, Mori wrapped an arm around Rocky, giving him a little shake.

"How are feeling?" He asked hoping that it helped instead of hurt. Most times, when people go through traumatic experiences, they shut themselves away from the world feeling like they can never escape the memories of whats happened to them. Mori knew better, and he knew that he could for sure bring Rocky back to his family, he just needed the boy to relax and trust in him.

"Fine." Rocky replies after a moment of thought.

"Just fine, not great?"

Shrugging his grandfathers arm from his shoulders, he turns away a bit. "Grandpa I'm not in the mood."

Blinking, he sighs. Glancing to his daughter, she shrugs with a shake of her head. Trying to lighten things up, he walks over to the stove to peek inside of a lidded pan. "What's for breakfast?"

"I made you and Rocky something, just grab a plate."

"Thank you, dear." Fixing himself something to eat, he grabs an extra plate for Rocky, setting the egg down then grabbing two strips of bacon before he realizes that Rocky has taken to something of vegetarianism so he puts them on his plate.

"Here, you should eat."

Rocky picked up his fork, poking at his egg. Jessica gives her father another expression to say that she's sorry if he's acting this way. Then she walks over to the table, placing a hand to her son's shoulder giving it a squeeze as if to tell him, it's okay and they all love him then she walked out.

Nudging Rocky on the arm that's hanging around his legs, Grandpa Mori leans over and whispers. "I can tell that you didn't want to speak with your mother in the room, so you tell me what's going on."

Rocky uncurled his self from the chair, and shrugged. "Grandpa... If I tell you something- anything, do you promise not to tell mom or dad?"

"I promise." He said in all honesty. Sometimes, though, Mori would admit to hearing things he didn't particularly like and telling his daughter seemed like the right thing to do, but he trusted his grandchildren to make the right desicions since they have enough gumption to come to him with their problems to get advice. One time Colt had come to him, age 16, saying that he thought he may have gotten a girl pregnant. Mori hated that his grandson was having sex at a young age but he really hated that Colt told him how long it's been going, and that he's been trying to handle it himself. Turns out the girls was pregnant by another boy and she was using Colt as sort of a crutch because she knew that he wouldn't just toss her to the streets. Shameful thing. Tum tum on the other hand was different when it came down to secrets he wanted to share; he would tell him about how he planned to give running away a try- but he'd actually be hiding out a friends house.

Tum tum often made him worry, thinking things like that; but in the end he never tried it and never brought it up again. Now Rocky, who has never had that many serious problems has one and it may be too big for Mori to give advice on but sometimes an ear was all you need.

Rocky picked up his plate and went into the living room, knowing that his grandfather would follow him. Taking a seat on the couch, he's glad that the man sat in the arm chair to give him his space. Taking a bite of his eggs, he chews it slowly then swallows.

"Rocky?"

"I'm thinking of to say it."

"Just take a deep breath, and let it out."

Sucking his lip, he sighs. Looking up at the mans face, but not his eyes, he says. "I have to tell someone this because I'm scared that if I keep it to myself any longer I might just lose it." Mori nods. "It's just so hard to explain... Grandpa? Do you believe in psychic abilities?"

Mori believed in many things, for instance: everyone has a gaurdian angle watching over them, shoes are better at payless, and sometimes when you see a little gleam of light it might be a ghost- might be. But he wasn't entirely sure what Rocky was saying.

Seeing the confused look on his face, he continues to explain the best he can. "Grandpa, I feel as if everyone is gonna hate me when they find out what I am."

"What are you?"

Rocky shrugged. "A freak. A demon... I don't know. But it's because of this that Maria took me in the first place."

"...I don't understand."

He takes another bite of egg. "I'm scared that everyone will hate me and that I'll be thrown out of the house and..." he felt tears forming. "I'm scared to be alone grandpa. I feel like she's going to get me- like she never left."

"I can see that, but I don't..."

"Look." Looking down at the remote, he concentrates on the shape of it. A simple rectangle with a few bumps where the bottons come up. Simple enough to lift for the low level he's become. His breathing changed, shook almost as his eyes became very focused on the object before him. The remote shook from left to right violently, feeling the boys mental energy wrapping around it, then it popped off the table with a loud clatter to the floor.

Mori's eyes went wide from shock. He couldn't believe what he was seeing! And Rocky means to tell him that he... Shaking off his stunned expression when he sees Rocky curl up, insecurely, again. No wonder he was so shocked about telling anyone this. Being a God living family such a thing is frowned upon as witch craft of sorts but that doesn't mean that Rocky will be hated, why would he think that?

"Rocky... That's... amazing what you did, but... your family will-..."

Cutting him off, Rocky says. "_Fear me_. They won't trust me. They won't understand..."

"I was going to say, they will always love you. No matter what."

Shaking his head, Rocky dips his face down to the nose against his forearms. "It's not fair... why does it have to be me Grandpa. Because I like to look at horoscopes and believe in the supernatural." That made Mori laugh. Rocky is clearly confused by it all. Frowning, his grandson just looked at him sideways.

"I'm sorry for laughing, but it's not at you." He scoots to the rim of the seat, reaching out a hand taking Rocky's that he allowed him to have. "Rocky. Your family loves you, they're afraid for your well being, sure, but they love you no differently then before."

"But don't you get it? I'm not the same as before, with this secret... I'm different now."

"Well that's funny," he let his hand go, setting his posture back to look over his grandson. "You look the same to me, sound the same... I'll bet you even smell the same." He took a mock whiff of air, causing Rocky to smile even a bit. "See there... being a... psychic as you call it won't change their opinion of you, it might take a while to get used to but it won't change things."

Rocky considered that. But how could he not feel the weight of the world coming down on him at the thought of telling them- their reactions, he just wanted to be normal not live like this. Secrets and lies... god, he's beginning to sound like he's believing Sin more and more. Shaking his head, he wondered where the use of the name _Sin_ came from when speaking about his alter. He's only just met him but... the weird boy says that he's known him longer than that... what did he mean by that? And that dream he had. Is it some kind of message?

"Rocky?"

"Maria took me because she sought me out," he heard himself saying without meaning to. "She came to school and found out about me, she reads aura's and she read mine to find out that I've had this secret for a long time." He spoke in even tones to keep himself going, because he knew that if he stopped for even a second he wouldn't speak again and he really wanted to talk to someone about all of this. Mori couldn't have shown up at a better time. "Since I was young, four maybe five I used to hang out by myself at the park or someplace blocked off from the rest of the world, and while there I would launch rocks into the distance and laugh about it- it was like a game then..." He rocked a bit, holding tightly to his knees that are pressed to his chest. "I was so good at it back then, I thought everyone could do it but then when we went to church and then I saw ghost or _something_... Everything just shattered for me."

"Shattered how?"

Rocky shrugged, shaking his head. He is so frightened to go on but he wants to get it out of his system. Sucking in a breath he goes again. "I used to see these black shadows in the night, they scared me at first but then when I figured that they meant me no harm I just wrote it off as something that I can do... They spoke to me, played with me... sometimes I think they even took me places."

"Took you places?" Mori remembered his daughter telling him about Rocky's odd habit of sleep walking, or that the family would downstairs and he would be asleep on the couch or at the front door, fully clothed like he were ready to go someplace but he never made it. _Does he mean to say that he was aware that he was sleep walking? Or that he was never asleep but following these shadows around the house and maybe out of it_.

"I'm not sure."

"Hmm?"

"Grandpa," he looked guilty just now. "I can hear what you're thinking, not on purpose! But it just kind of happens... When dad told me to stop what I was doing and not talk about the things I tried to talk to him about, I managed to shut off my gift without even trying but it has been so long since I used them that... I don't know how to do it anymore... Maria said she was gonna help me harness my abilities but... I don't know."

Mori was still disrupted by the fact that Rocky heard his thoughts. Maybe the family would stop trusting him if they didn't think they could get any privacy.

"So... what do I do?"

Scratching his whispy beard, he looks into his grandson's catlike eyes. "I wish I knew."

Rocky opened his arms, crossing the short distance to the arm chair, pulling his grandfather into a tight hug. The minute the man put his arms around him, Rocky began to cry. If Mori couldn't help him, than who? _Maria is right... the only people who won't make us feel like we're freaks is our own kind. That's why she took me, to build a place for people like us to be ourselves and not feel hated upon, or like we'll be studied should anyone find out. Was it wrong to kill her?_

Pulling away, Rocky swallowed hard before saying. "I'm gonna go upstairs and rest for a while."

Mori nods. "Okay."

In his old bedroom Tum tum stood, wide eyed and shocked. He didn't just see what he thought he saw? The remote just... How did Rocky? Biting his thumb nail, he looked down in thought. _Could Maria have been right? She kept saying things to Rocky that made no sense, about how they were alike and things like that. If Maria is some freaky psychic does that mean she took Rocky because he's the same way?_

"Tum tuuuum! The bus is waiting." He heard his grandfather call.

"I'm coming!" Slipping out of the room, he knew he would have to find a way to talk to Rocky about all of this later. But for right now, he had to get to school, they're going on a field trip today.

Rocky couldn't get any sleep; he just kept jumping from out of it when he felt his self drifting off, then he would check the time and seeing that there is a window he knows that he is still safe at home. He got out of bed when he smelt stir fry cooking in the kitchen letting him know that soon he and his grandfather would be having lunch. So, to keep himself distracted, he went to the window and took a seat on the small bench in front of it. With the curtain moved over, he sees the cameramen aiming the large black recording devices his way. Let them look. He will never talk to them.

He could sort of hear the voices of the news reports, which have gone from one to four now as they spoke quickly about what, to them, is breaking news.

"This is Nina Post-..."

"Erica Morgan."

"Bobby Young."

"Patricia Jackson."

_Hn_. He thinks to himself. _See how breaking news they think it is when the victim flips them off_. He smirks. Movement on the streets caught his eye, a car pulling up by the curb. He's seen this car before... _Robbie_. He hasn't seen him since that night, and he was sure that he wasn't ready for the encounter yet. Robbie Ballerini is Maria's nephew, he knew the woman was insane. He saw her at the club that night, why didn't he say anything? No. He definitly isn't ready for this encounter.

The reporters saw the boy climb from the car and the second they realized where his intentions were they swarmed like angry bees. That made Rocky smile. Maybe it would keep him from coming in. Tch. No such luck, he was at the door waving his hands in what seemed to be a compromise to let him get to where he needed to go. Seconds later the door bell rang and Mori was at it letting the young man in. Rocky thought about closing the door but he didn't want to feel trapped, so he left it open, he let Robbie come.

The boys dark form appeared at the doorway. Rocky just stared at him from his place on the windowseat. From the look on the other boys face, he wasn't quite ready for this encounter either. Both boys, dark and light looking at each other. The silence like another presence watching them and laughing, or maybe it is another presence- _his _presence.

"I had a dream about coming home, that night I passed out in that hell house." Rocky said, in a quiet voice, moving from the window, drawing the curtains closed.

Robbie took a step forward, closing the door after himself quietly. The two kept approaching each other as Rocky spoke.

"I dreamt that, I came in and everything was the same as if always was... People were happy to see me... You were there."

Robbie was unsure of whether or not he should smile, so he didn't. He just kept approaching, closer and closer.

"I hit you. For being there- I hit you." Closer.

"Alright." A little closer until the two are now face to face, body to body. Close enough to smell the cologne that one is wearing, close enough to see the tidal wave of blue in the others eyes close enough to... to...


	6. Conflicts of the Heart

Chapter 6.

He can see the look in Rocky's eyes. He can see it because it's the same look that about 100 fellow students have been giving him since they found out that his room mates captor was his aunt. At first they just whispered negative things about him, but then a couple people became brave and decided that they wanted a more physical approach to their anger so they beat on him. Fist pounding into his unsuspecting face, leaving purple welts when the beating stopped and his skin showed his pain rather than just let him feel it. But through the daily beatings, Robbie didn't fight back. He couldn't because he blamed himself too. If it weren't for him kissing the other boy never would have run off which means he never would have blacked out, and he never would have been taken. So they could go on and fight him then, hate him, hurt him because he deserved it.

"Hit me..." Robbie asked. "Just stop standing there, staring at me like that."

"You don't tell me what to do- nobody does..." Whispered Rocky, eyes locked on his former room mate.

"I just mean that it might make you feel better."

Rocky laughed at that, it was dry, small, he wasn't even sure it was a real laugh but he found his friends words funny. How would beating on him make the pain of those stolen months go away? He just didn't see the logic in that.

"Rocky I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For letting this happen... If I had known-..."

"If you had known it still would have happened."

"But you would have been found sooner!"

Shaking his head, he sneered. "And you don't think I know that! I'm not stupid Robbie but she would have taken me anyway! That's what I'm telling you, those are the truths and if she detected even the slightest bit of chance that you would come for me, she would have moved us!" Lowering his voice incase his grandfather was listening, he continued. "Even if you knew that the woman at the club was your aunt, you couldn't have stopped her from doing what she did."

Robbie still didn't understand what Rocky was talking about. He saw the girl at the club, somewhat but he was clear that she was a blonde. _Could that woman at the club have helped my aunt take him?_

"That woman at the club was your aunt... She had me fooled into seeing what she projected into my head... She lead me to believe that she was a woman named Maria Atkinson. I've been put through hell because of her for the longest time but in the end she got what she deserved."

It was weird to hear Rocky speaking this way. He's usually so kind, no matter what. Sure he only knew him for a little while, but with guys like him that was long enough to feel like you've known them forever. _But wait a second, did he just-..._

Rocky nods. He knew what Robbie was thinking, he knows what everyone is thinking. He can't help it!

Lifting a finger, the brunet says. "Than it's true... You're just like he-..."

A fist landed him square in the mouth, a punch that felt as though it could have been a lot stronger if the thrower of the punch had a little more muscle on their bones. But that didn't stop him from feeling the fear that rushed into his ears when he felt the body heat of his former room mate pin him against the wall as he hoovered before him, looking to be seven feet when he is actually just 5'9".

"I could hurt you more than you're worth with just the batting of my eyelashes." Grabbing his friend by the throat, he snarls down at him. "Don't you _ever_ say that I'm like that woman. Do. You. Understand."

Nodding, the cowering male grabs his throat once its been released, collapsing to the floor to catch his breath. "I'm sorry... I shou- should have worded it," he swallows hard on air. "better."

Rocky sits on his bed, head down, looking like he had done something wrong all of a sudden. Robbie, feeling brave, stood and joined him on his sitting spot. Wrapping an arm around his friends shoulders, he rubbed the solemn males shoulder to comfort him but Rocky shrugged it off.

"I'm sorry." Robbie explained in a weak tone. "I meant to say that, you have abilities... don't you."

"You know I do! Why are you harrassing me?!"

Placing his hands up in defense, Robbie shakes his head. "I'm not trying to hurt you. I'm just trying to be of some comfort... Let you know you don't have to be afraid to tell me about what's going on with you because out of anyone I understand."

"How?"

"As a boy, I've been able to see a bit into the future- sort of a premonition if you will."

Rocky had picked up on the slight amount of mental energy the boy exuseded. He could guess he had some type of gift but he wasn't sure of what. Now he knows and it's nothing to flip about. Anyone can have a bit of clarevoyance, most of that is just commen sense.

"I know what it's like to think the world will see you as a monster, but Rocky" he grabbed the blonds shoulder's turning him so that he would look at him. "You don't have to believe that. People take things hard at first but after time they accept it... Just know when to tell and who to tell but in the mean time, if you feel that this secret is eating you alive than know that you have me... you've always got me."

"Marissa," he used her real name for the first time outloud since he had learned it. "She wanted to make a world where people like us could be comfortable with it. Where we wouldn't have to hide... I believe that that is why she took me. But it doesn't excuse what she did to me; being misunderstood doesn't give her the right to mess with a persons life- Robbie why don't you get that!"

"I don't understand what you mean?"

"For fucks sake!" Rocky stood from the bed, walking over to the bathroom door. "Do you know how long I've had these abilities locked inside of me?" Without waiting for the answer, he says. "Since I was five! Do you know when your aunt found me?"

Robbie shook his head, tears welling in his eyes. He could sense that Rocky was about to cry, that he had hurt him by making him talk and that made him wanna curl into a ball and die. Since Rocky went missing he had to admit that he went from bisexual to just plain queer being sick over the boy made him realize just how much he liked him. And he never wanted to hurt him again, that was his vow for when they found him.

"Robbie, your aunt stalked me. She stalked me and when she got me alone she-..." He sniffled. "She-..." He won't let the tears fall, he just can't. Crying in his sleep, he couldn't help but he refused to do it while awake. Grandpa was just so relieving that he burst into tears, he didn't run screaming or tell him to get out. He just said that they would figure something out and that his family will always love him.

Standing, Robbie walked over to the blond and wrapped him into a hug. At first, Rocky tried to shake the male off, but he soon wrapped his arms around him as well. He wasn't crying and didn't plan to. He just wanted someone to hold him. If Robbie knew what it was like to be a freak- as less extent as it is, then he does know what he's feeling even if you can hide premonition by just not saying anything. Rocky on the other hand is doomed to listen in on things he doesn't want to hear for forever. He will be able to drag objects to himself effortlessly, lift them and anything else off the ground with just a squint or thrust of his hand. He doesn't want to be this way. He just wants to be normal.

Robbie touched the boys out-grown hair, shocked at how long it has gotten in such a short amount of time. But then again, he read someplace that the body reacts to things in strange ways and mass amounts of fear can grow a persons hair out or their fingernails, toenails. It can cause premature graying hairs all kinds of things. He felt sick to his stomach with guilt. More so because with Rocky this close he couldn't stop himself from enjoying the hug, the smell of him. Smell alone is probably why he turned his head ever so slightly brushing lips with the male before Rocky moved his away but the brunet fought him, turning his head this way and that to get to him but Rocky moved everytime out. Why is he being so stubborn? Frustrated with the little dance, Robbie let go of his hug and grabbed his room mates face.

"Back off!" Shoving him hard enough to make the hungry male release his face, Rocky looked down at him with eyes that said he would spit on him if he didn't have enough sense. "What were you planning to do, Robbie? Huh?"

"I'm sorry... I don't know what came over me."

"You want me don't you? I see it in your eyes- the way you look at me... It's just as _she_ did." Swaying with drunken rage, Rocky grabbed the end of his shirt lifting it over his head, tossing it to the floor. "You wanna rape me too? Hmm? You wanna tie me to my bed, I have lots of ties in the drawer" crossing the room, he opens said druer. "Here. Do it! DO IT!"

"No." He said in a weak tone. "Rocky I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me," he had to search for the right words to use so that he wouldn't make the situation worse. "I've just been missing you for so long and... in all that time I fell in love with you. I guess I just couldn't be happy with just what we have as friends so I... tried to push it to something more." He didn't move from the floor. Too afraid.

"Push it something more?" He said the words as if he were trying to figure out what they meant. "...Robbie wake up! I'm not, nor will I ever be- gay! I like women! I've had girlfriends- infact one of them is coming to see me this Thursday and who knows, maybe the two of us will get back together because the chance to be with me is something that only a _girl_ can accomplish."

Nodding, he lowered his eyes. "I know. I get that, I'm sorry."

"Just... just stop it. Please... I want us to remain friends, I do because... I trusted you at one time but after that I just don't know anymore."

"You can trust me, I swear. No more attempts at you." He stands, slowly.

"I hope so... I would feel horrible knowing that I treated you badly when you don't really deserve it." He sighs. "I'm tired Robbie. I'm tired and I'm in a place where I don't wanna be pressured into doing a lot of things. I just want things to go back to normal, I wanna get over this, return to school and just be normal. but everyone around me is acting so weird I just don't know if _normal_ can be accomplished at this point and it's frustrating me."

"I know."

"So please... No pressure. Just be my friend, my room mate... The guy I showed around the first time we met, the guy who partied with me and laughed with me before we went to bed... Don't be some creep when I already owe you."

"You don't owe me."

"My mom told me that you were a big help in finding me, that if you hadn't gone to Canada and hung that flier I never would have been found."

"It was nothing." He took a step closer, pausing when Rocky backed away.

"Just give it time... And maybe we could be-..."

"Lunch boys! You hungry?" Grandpa Mori called through the door.

Colt wondered, as he sits at his desk in science class, when he got to be so unpopular. Was it that he's nearly dated every girl in his grade level as a senior, even some juniors. Or is it because, since taken, everyone has been looking at his older brother. Colt's found note upon note in his locker each one asking him if his brother is okay and if he needs anything that he should call them. Tah! Like Rocky would do that. He doesn't even know these people, why would he want help from them. Course he's been acting kind of odd around the house like his own family is full of strangers but then again its only been one day and he should really give his brother time to come out of his shell. That display from last night, Rocky laying their on his bed like he's being taken against his will, it was too much. Watching him kick their mother was too much. He can't handle all of this, but when you're dateless escaping the house with out a plausible excuse was kind of tough.

_Maybe I should just stay out of the house until I'm sure everyone is asleep. Yeah mom would love that._ Shaking his head, he looks to his left at a cute little french girl that transfered to the school not long ago. He wondered if she were seeing anyone yet. Accents drive guys out of their minds, and if she has one that thick when speaking he could only imagine what she'd sound like laying beneath him. He really shouldn't think this way, especially with what happened to his brother. But he is a male and he does have needs.

Gretchen turns to Colt, big brown eyes scanning his staring face with light of a smile as her tight brunette curls swirl away from her face. Colt smiles back causing her to say. "I'm sorry to hear about your brother, but it's good that he is home, no?"

Nodding with a goofy smile, he says. "Yeah. It's great that he's home. You know, if you and I went out sometime, I could bring you in to see him."

Her face lit up when hearing that. "You can do that?! I would love to speak with him," the girl was practically breathless- not a bad sound. "I think that he was so brave to help that girl, what was her name?"

"Beats me."

"Well, she was a little deaf child and he helped out of that home she told this to the police." Gretchen turned in her seat to face him better, giving Colt a better view of her cute lengthy body.

_Hm. No wonder Frenchmen are lovers rather than fighters. Their women are hot._ After a second thought, he snapped out of his daze, remembering that Gretch' never exactly said 'yes' to the date part of his statement. "Gretchen, how about I take you to some nice little Italian place Friday? We could get a booth, it'll be really romantic."

"Oh... About the date..." The girl looked at Colt's questioning face. She couldn't tell such a little puppy dog face no. So with a smile, she placed a hand on his thigh saying. "Yes, of course, dinner sounds fine. You will pick me up at seven?"

"Seven, then."

"Wonderful. And you will tell your brother I'm coming- I don't want to upset him."

"Yeah."

Twisting in her seat, she returned her attention to the teacher who didn't seem to notice the noise going on in the back of the room. Colt felt good. So maybe she was only interested in meeting his somehow celebraty brother, she still said yes so he'll take that. And he was sure that after one date she won't even remember that he has an older brother.

The stir fry Grandpa made was delicious. Robbie had seconds and Rocky had thirds, he felt like he hadn't eaten in years. Nothing besides meager portions of soup each day could really get on a guys nerves. The rich taste of rice going into his stomach made him smile, the vegetables were fried to perfection and Mori even made them a protein shake- he knew that Rocky was a bit on the light side since he wasn't fed much and he knew of just the thing to give him to put the plump back in his face.

The three of them spoke lightly about this and that: how the two boys met, things Grandpa taught his grandson's about life, a couple silly stories of Robbie as a clumsy, unpopular child. It was a very nice lunch. Rocky felt completely comfortable and safe for the first time since he came home. Maybe Robbie was right, maybe he does need someone who can relate to his personal issues, Grandpa knows and Robbie knows so anytime he needs to vent he can take his pick, why bring the others into it.

"It's the same thing at school you know." Robbie said, gesturing his fork out the kitchen window; the others turn to look. "The media is at the college too. They wanna ask the students a bunch of questions about you. It should be on the news tonight- the interviews."

Rocky shakes his head. "I don't wanna watch the news. They're all about of dogs."

"I know, I saw what they did to that little girl you helped."

"Noelie, her name is Noelie."

"Noelie, I'm sorry."

"It was terrible, I'm gonna write to her and make sure she's okay." He said morely to himself.

"I read in the paper that the others were gonna have their funerals on the same day- Friday. Are you gonna go?"

Rocky hadn't thought about that. Go to the other victims funerals. Would that be appropriate? After all, he didn't know any of them- except for maybe Alfonse. But they weren't exactly buddy buddy since he tried to kill him, and he hurt Noelie in a way that only the two of them know of- though he was sure that the young girls parents knew about it if the hospital asked her, maybe forced a test on her. Bastards. Can't they just take the statement and leave them alone. They tried to probe Rocky, he could only imagine what they would do to a young girl who had no say in what happened to her.

"Probably not." He replied after a while. Looking at the licked streaks on his plate, he wondered if there were anymore to eat.

Robbie watched Rocky, eyes concern. He wants so badly to have the boy lean on him, love him. He doesn't know if he can stand the thought of not being with him any longer. _I love you._ He knew he thought the words on purpose, but he couldn't help it! He does love him, he's come to grips with that. _But, I'll restrain myself because I respect you._

Not missing a second of the conversation, the green ninja looked at his friend; river colored eyes narrowing before he projected to him. _You had better because I meant what I said._

Mori looked between them, confusion crossing his features before he snapped out of it and took the plates to the sink. "I'm gonna clean up now."

"I'll help you." Says Rocky.

Knowing that he has now become an unwanted guest, Robbie stands as well. "I'll be going, I have a class at two... Bye Rocky. Bye Mr. Shintaro."

"Please call me Mori."

Nodding, he says. "Bye Mori." Walking to the front door, he opens it snapping it quickly before the press could snap any photos of the inside of the house in hopes of getting one of his not-so-secret crush. _I do love you Rocky, and I'll make you see how much._ Pushing through the crowd of microphones with voices somewhere behind them asking what was going on inside of the house, Robbie climbs into his car, starts it up then leaves for school.


	7. Days of Our Lives

Chapter 7.

_Tuesday_.

Rocky went into a state of being that seemed a bit _off_ to the family. He had come downstairs and made them all breakfast to have before they left for the day. He spoke to them whenever he liked rather than when spoken to. And when everyone was done Rocky cleaned both the dishes and the kitchen. Grandpa told his daughter, in private, that the two of them sat down for a talk and things seem to be sorting out for Rocky, he just needs a little more time to process it all. Jessica understood that but when her son hugged her before she left for work, tears fell from her eyes which earned her a laugh from her son followed by another hug before he whispered that everything was gonna be okay.

Later when everyone got home, he helped Tum Tum with his homework, told Colt that his new girlfriend could talk to him and he even helped Jessica make dinner. Sam was amazed wondering if his son was making this sudden recovery because he might have maybe overheard them talking about sending him to therapy, but he didn't bring it up about not needing it so maybe their son is stronger than they gave him credit for.

_Wednesday._

Rocky was the complete opposite of himself from yesterday; there was no glowing breakfast of french toast with butter peacan syrup with a side of bacon, instead the family was gifted with a silent Rocky, who seemed to be looking at them all from the side of his eye as if waiting for one of them to say something cruel or strike him. It was very odd. He withdrew from all touches including his siblings and his father, people whom he seemed to be better at getting along with since he came back. Jessica had gone past his room that night and heard whimpering sounds so she guessed that his sudden paranoid behaviour is from a bad dream. What Rocky did for the rest of the day she would have no way of knowing because her father said that it wasn't something he is permitted to share, Rocky has to make that choice.

Sam still thinks that therapy is the right method to all of this and with each passing day Jessica is starting to feel that he's right. Rocky's mood seemed to perk up when the young girl Noelie came by to see him, her son had apparently written a letter to her and instead of writing back she came right over. The two hugged each other fiercely, and spoke forever in sign language making Jessica even more jealous. The only time that she knew what they were speaking about was when Rocky was translating for her as they ate. She said she liked the food, and that the Douglas' are nice people. When Noelie left, so did her son's sudden happiness. There were a lot of other quirks about Rocky that Jessica has begun to notice, like his eyes, they're always so tired in the morning. Then there's the fact that he's been wearing nothing but pajamas everyday, she tried to make him change his clothes but his response was that all of his clothes were at school. Which is why she had to ask Colt to go and get them. He said he'd do it later. Which now leaves them in...

_Thursday._

Rocky seemed anxious over something. Like he were waiting for something bad to happen. He read Emily's letter over and over again, checking the time checking the date, he was ready for this. How could he not be!? It's just Emily; the girl who dumped him, the girl who somehow became his first girlfriend even though he had said time and time again that she meant nothing to him romantically. Yeah, this isn't going to be scary at all.

Standing in front of the mirror in his bathroom he's running a brush through his hair. This has to be the first time he's even touched it since he got back. At the hospital some nurses had done it up for him, he allowed this for reasons he didn't know. They did a nice job too, he just wished they hadn't taken it upon their much older than he is selves to compliment him at every turn. Didn't they know how much they were hurting him? Didn't they care about what he'd been through? He doubted it, that's the way the world is, they see nothing but vanity and they feel they must praise it. So then why? Why is he taking the time out this morning to brush his hair? _Is_ it because of Emily? Or maybe he's just beginning to realize that it's becoming uncomfortably tangled without a little grooming. Well, whatever the reason, he twisted it into a braid, which was a strange thing for him to do since he's never once touched a girls hair to know the first thing about styling length. He held Paula's in place while she clipped it but that was about it. But somehow he managed, guessing he had Sin to thank for that. Speaking of which...

_I have questions for him. Questions that only he can answer but... I think he may be gone, so then how can I ask him the things I want to ask? Could I call him like Samantha Stevens does Uncle Arthor or Endora from Bewitched?_ He wonders recalling how the character that Elizabeth Montgomary played used to look up at the ceiling and bellow to anyone that she wished to speak with or see. But then again, that's tv and this is real life, he doesn't think it works that way.

_With my luck Sin is gone for good and I'll never have to see or hear from that nut again. And anyway since he hasn't made his presence known since that last time maybe I was finally able to get rid of him. It could happen._ Looking into the mirror, he frowns. There's something about his appearance now that's just... too much like _HIM._ The fact that his smile turned into nothing better than a practiced smirk since he couldn't quite get the real thing, or maybe it's the fact that his sleepy eyes look more like arrogant slits. He couldn't be sure, but whatever it is, he hates it with every fiber of his being.

Leaving the bathroom, he puts on some clothes that his mother bought for him. They're nice form fitting blue jeans and a blue t-shirt. He can deal with his arms showing. But as he went into his brothers room to borrow a long sleeve white shirt from Colt, he knew that he couldn't. Slipping it on, he pulls the t-shirt over it to complete a somewhat fashionable look for himself then he walks downstairs and sits on the couch. He hates this. Being alone. Grandpa went to the store for a few things for dinner leaving Rocky alone for a while to collect his thoughts. He stares lazily at a box of Kleenex on the coffee table. His mother has been crying again. He knows why, but he just can't give her what she wants- not yet, all he can see is the woman who took him right from under her nose, he sees his mistake for thinking he was grown-up enough to shop on his own that day. No. It was both of their faults for what happened to him which meant together they're a bad combination and he won't be ambushed into that false sense of security again.

Said box began to shake due to his longing gaze. "Rrrrr." He used his voice for the first time that day; his teeth bared as he holds onto his aching head. _What is it now?!_ He wonders as he looks around for the source that's giving him this migrane. "Rrrrr. No. Not now." His eyes close bringing darkness all around him but wait! There's something else there, something... A memory, he can feel it like bullets shooting through his brain just grazing him so that he feels the pain but not the memory. "Come on. Come on. What are you trying to tell me?"

_"Rocky you're so dumb." Said a familiar voice. "If you're gonna move things you have to focus not just shoot sparatically in its direction."_

He jumped out of his thoughts, pain seizing fire. "Sin."

_"The one and only." _His altered self is dressed just as he is but seems to pull the look off a lot better. Glad to be noticed, he leaves his place on the arm of the couch, walking around the living room as if he's staking the place out for some reason. _"What do you plan on doing when that, that Emily gets here, hm? You know she's gonna ask you a bunch of bullshit questions, force you into telling her what happened to you- like girls often do, and then what? You're gonna piss her off with your sour disposition and make her leave. It's all for nothing. Now Robbie, Robbie has something to offer us." _

"Don't you mean you?"

_"Is that what I mean? Because last time I checked I am you- well, better but, soon you'll be better too and then you and I can live in harmony instead of hiding out from one another."_

"Hiding out how?"

_"Can you really be so dense? You know what I've been up to; sneaking around in the catacombs of your mind, messing with this and that. You wanted to talk to me so here's your chance." _He moves the curtain over to look outside at the reporters who have slowly began to dwendle as the days have gone by finally realizing that they aren't going to sucker Rocky into talking. Watching the news, he had to laugh at the stories they made up about him and the family, they even went as far as to say he's gone from one prison to another because he chooses to not leave the house.

"...I had a dream... I knew you, I spoke with you, played with you. It was like we were old buddies or something... I wanna know how long that went on. I wanna know..." His shoulders drop. "I don't even know what I wanna know anymore. I just want answers, I want all of this to stop."

_"Tell you what,"_ he said already in bargening mode. _"You let me have a little fun this weekend and I'll tell you everything. But, if you choose to to cover your ears at anytime during... I get to take charge of this body for as long as I like."_

"Seems to me your the only one that benefits from that deal." Rocky shakes his head. "If I let you out,"

_"I know, I know. No big shocks for mommy or daddy about their precious son."_

"Right."

_"So fire away."_

He has so many questions like, why was Sin around for so long and why is he calling himself that so suddenly when at Maria's he said his name was Rocky. "Okay. In my dream, I just turned eight... I remember that day because I got another ninja turtle and I went to the park to play with it." Sin nods, he knows that he sent him the dream and Rocky took the bait easily. "You were there asking me to play with my abilities with you, we spoke so familiar and I called you Sin. So my question is.. How long have we known each other that I've forgotten about you."

That was an odd question. It actually shocked Sin so hard he didn't have any smart retorts to the question. It made him feel as if maybe Rocky... missed him. Taking a seat on the couch, he sighs. _"We met each other when you were seven... You gave me my name and your strength to protect you whenever you froze up in fear. That's all I'm going to tell you."_

"But you said you'd answer all of my questions."

_"And I decided that I don't want to."_ He snaps back, regaining his lost composure. _"You wouldn't be able to handle it anyway. You're so weak! And pathetic... I feel sick just looking at you." _Standing, he starts to fade away. _"I will get the life I deserve for all the pain you caused me and there isn't anything you can do about it."_

With that said, his evil twin was gone. But he gave him all he needed to know. _I named him... which means he came from something bad that happened to me before Maria got me in the dressing room, but what? And why can't I remember where I got that Donatello from? It was a gift... Did Emily give it to me, is that why it mant so much to me that I would freak out over dropping it_.

As if on cue, the door bell rang. _It's her. She's here._

Rocky wasn't sure how it happened, one minute he was there answering the door and oh how the camera's clicked and filmed away at the site of that, next thing he knew he was asking her if she wanted a drink or maybe something to eat. But she refused it all. Her eyes, her big blue eyes just bore into him, melted him, making him want to hide away and stay safe from her questioning gaze. The two of them sat on the couch, speaking quietly to one another, mostly Emily talking while Rocky asked her questions within the conversation.

What is she majoring in at college? What has she been doing since her family moved? Does she have a job? Good friends?

Her answers were sweet and very much like her youthful self. Math, to the first question. She's been settling down, getting her life together, thinking about him and his family, to the second question. Burger King, to the third question; she's assistant manager and finally, yes she has very good friends. Emily says everyone in the in the neighborhood is just wonderful and they've had sleep overs and make-over parties, she's even got a good roommate at college.

Rocky answered the questions truthfully as well. He's majoring in Science of the mind, he and his family have been good since the Heart family moved away; but he's missed her from time to time. He no longer goes to work but he did have a job at the local bookstore and as for good friends, yes, he's made quite a few.

After the Q and A session they sat quietly watching t.v. unsure of what to say to one another anymore. Emily wanted to ask him about what happened, only knowing what the news people had told the public but she didn't want to be rude and force it out of him. Rocky wanted to ask her what she thought of it all. That she was right about Maria and if she expected an apology since he didn't listen to her. Looking her over, she had changed in some ways. Her hair is shorter, wavey; he likes it. But her round face remains the same, her figure changed just a bit but she is still curvy just as he remembered her. Since her hair is pulled into a ponytail, he could see blue diamond earrings shining in the semi sunny room.

"I'll have to remember to buy you earrings as a Christmas present." He points to her ears.

Shooting a glance sideways as though she can see them as well, she laughs and places her hands up. "One of my independant changes." She explained. "I thought it was major for me without going to over the top." Laughing uncomfortably, she reaches out to brush his bangs. "But look at you, I didn't know you were growing your hair out."

"I didn't know either, it just sort of happened while I was..." he trailed off. Shaking his head at the fog in the air, he looks at her between the eyes to avoid her direct gaze because he knew his mind would try jumping into hers without his consent and he didn't want to know what she really thought of him, it would hurt too much. Luckily she wasn't thinking about anything when they stopped talking, she just hummed a song.

"It's a good look for you though... You look like, a little kitten with those eyes of yours."

"My eyes?"

"Yeah," she smiles sweetly. "I've always thought they had a cat-like quality to them, I'm actually kind of jealous sometimes because you know, it's a girls job to be pretty not a mans."

That was a punch in the face. Rocky could guess that that was when the two of them attached themselves to each other, heading upstairs without much thought to it, stripping themselves of their clothes and sneakers. Rocky's kisses were gentle at first, sweet with hesitance but the less clothes he had on the more force he put behind it, like he were trying to make himself like it as there was an almost desperation to it. Emily was just trying to keep up with him, grabbing a hold of his shoulders in hopes to keep him back a bit, this was all going to fast! She had never had intentions of coming over for this, she wanted to make sure her childhood friend was alright, hang out with him and maybe give him a little kiss goodbye not be straddled underneath his assalt.

_Come on! Come on_! He barks at himself. _Get excited! Give me something_!He ground his hips into her forcing the heat between them to get a reaction from his lower region but it doesn't seem to be working.

It seemed to be working for her though but something was wrong, she knew it. Catching her breath, she taps her childhood friend on the shoulder. "Rocky wait."

"No, it has to work." He argued with himself.

Panting from the lightheaded actions of it all, she tries to push him away again. "Rocky we don't have to do this."

Scrunching his hands to fist a hunk of the pillow so that he doesn't grip her, he growls in frustration. "Yes we do! We have to! I know this will work... it has to!" Opening his tightly closed eyes, he glares at her looking her up and down as if trying to see something. "Roll over." He commanded.

"What?"

"Roll over! Are you deaf?! It won't work with me looking at you," he looked down at the bed. "This is wrong... this is all wrong. I know you, I like you this is supposed to work. He can't be right, he can't be."

"Who can't be?"

"Him! Sin! Stupid! He said that I'm... But I'm not, you have to believe me!" He pounds his fist to his chest. "I'm a boy! And this is what boys do with girls they like but I can't seem to get it to work..." much to the girls relief, he moves off of her to sit at the edge of the bed. "It's supposed to work."

"What is? Rocky you're scaring me."

"I can't get hard... I'm sorry... it's not you, it's me."

"...Rocky, I don't even wanna do that with you so it's fine but... what are you talking about whose telling you things?"

"Just leave, please." He's defeated to the point of hiding his face in his hands.

"Rocky, you're upset, I don't think I should leave you alone."

"I'm always alone Emily. I'm always gonna be alone."

Emily had gone just as quickly as she had came once she spoke with and visited the Douglas' for a bit she said her goodbye's, sad eyes turned on Rocky.

_Friday._

Colt was beginning to think this was a bad idea as he sits outside waiting for Gretchen to show up. He planned on walking her home- well, to his home since Jessica said she could come over for dinner. Hn. If she only knew the real reason her son was bringing the girl over, she'd be sick. Colt is feeling a little sick his self. He didn't want to put his brother out like some freak show but this girl is really pretty and he just wants one date with her plus he asked said brother and he said he didn't care. But, there is the thing about him saying that when he was having a good day, after that he was moody- especially after his visit with Emily, the girl seemed like she couldn't wait to get out of there. He wondered if maybe they had a fight or something? No shock there, no matter how old a problem is the wound can still be pierced letting the deep cut feel the sting of cool air once again.

"I am ready to go." Gretch said as she walks from the school spotting her date for tonight. Colt planned to take her to a movie after dinner. Girls these days don't do the whole sit in a car and get mauled thing anymore. Gretchen looks beautiful today, her short hair tied back into a ponytail of curls; her curvy body dressed in a white linon dress with little pink flowers all over it. "I have brought a book for Rocky to read. He likes to do this, yes, I heard it on the news."

_Must be because of that picture of him reading in the window._ Colt doesn't why his brother lets the media take pictures of him like that, doesn't he know he's feeding into these people sickness for news. It can't be helped, and he can't say anything because talking to Rocky is impossible. He just knows he'll say or do the wrong thing. "We'd better get going, I'd rather you meet my brother before my parents get home."

"Why?" She looks over her shoulder when Colt places a hand to the small of her back, giving her a light lead toward his car. The two climbed in and he started it up heading home when the break released.

Tum tum sits in the living room, doing his homework knowing that Rocky is watching him over his shoulder to make sure he's doing it right. It's little things like that that let Tum know his brother is in there somewhere and he smiles from that.

_That's right!_ Thinks Tum recalling what he'd seen a few days ago; Rocky flipping the remote. Rocky moved in attention at the sound of his brothers mental voice. _When should I ask him about it? Or maybe I should talk to Colt first, see what he thinks._

_I wonder what he's talking about?_ Thinks the older male. Looking up when he feels his first brothers aura, the front door opens and in walks Colt with his girlfriend... what was her name again?

"Remember what I said, don't touch him." Whispers Colt, taking Gretchen's jacket.

"I will not." Walking over to the couch, she takes a seat with no regard of the poor younger boy sitting on the floor where her legs have landed. "I am so honored to meet with you." Her accent lacing every word.

"...Um... Thanks."

"You are very handsome, I have seen your picture on the flyers and then on the news but they do you no justice!" She declared.

Rocky opened his mouth to tell this girl to shut up, but decided to shake it off. Last thing he wanted to do was get his brother mad at him for being rude to his latest screw. _Hn. Dinner with the family. Colt's never liked **anyone** that much so **obviously** the only reason he asked Mom if she could join us for dinner is because this girl wanted to meet me as the only way she would date him. So sad. Colt deserves better._ He started when the girl took his hand patting it between her own, sorrowful look in her eyes.

"It must have been terrible for you in there. I heard that they found pictures tapes to the bedroom wall, upstairs."

"Really." Says Colt not knowing about that. He tries not to pay attention to the news, especially if they're just gonna lie. Calling their home a prison, Rocky is free to come and go if he likes his brother just chooses not to.

"Oh yes! They said they found burnt out camera's and things here and there. It was released... Wednesday I believe- maybe Tuesday."

"Good for them." Says Rocky in a blasse manner. "Too bad Maria isn't alive still, since my abled body isn't proof enough that she did something to me and the others. All that lovely evidence would put her away for another what... twenty years before she gets out and does something to someone else again." Everyone cocked a brow at that. "Never mind. What do you want from me? The story of my life? A romantic moment with the boy who is worth abducting?"

"Eeeh, no... I just wanted to meet you- ask if you're ok."

Rocky nodded slowly. "Yes. I'm fine. So if the show is over, I'm gonna go watch tv upstairs."

"Oh! That reminds me, I brought you a book. It should help you."

Taking the heavy book from the girls he looks over the cover. "Tainted Love? I wasn't in love with her." He tosses the offered book onto the couch. "She won't last Colt, learn how to pick 'em." With that he left upstairs.

Tum tum had to stare after his brother from that. No matter how bad things got he would never be _that_ rude to someone. Something's up with him and he's gonna find out what that is.


	8. Peeping Tammy?

A.N: Thank you guys for reading, I hope you're liking it so far. Now we're finally into the good stuff so thanks for bearing with me on the opening scenes . Love ya bunches lighter.

Chapter 8.

Weeks have passed and now its February. For the most part Rocky has gone almost completely back to normal, the only differences are that whenever his mother asks for something he jumps at it. It's almost like he's become her little slave boy. Jessica was at her limit when he showed up in their bedroom to make sure that she had an extra blanket and she was more than ready to confront and force him into therapy when at dinner one night he says.

"I'm ready to go back to school." He looked about the faces of his family making sure that they heard him right.

"Rocky," Jessica was suddenly terrified all over again with thoughts of bad things happening to him; she wants to hold onto him, keep him safe. "Are you sure? It hasn't been that long since you've been back, do you really think you're ready."

"Mom, I've read every book in this house twice; cleaned this place so much that I think the paint is chipping, I've seen five different marathons on tv and during the comercials I haven't seen one about me and what happened. The media has been gone for sometime now. I think now is as good a time as any to venture back out." He looked at the table. "Even if its just as simple as a walk... anything is better than being cooped up inside."

There was a silence in the room; no one knew what to say. Since he's been back Jessica and everyone else has contributed to him staying inside and away from prying eyes and neighbors wanting to dredge up bad memories. Could it be that they are no better than his captor?

Swallowing her nerves, Jessica placed her fork down then reached across the table to take her sons hand. "Rocky, baby... I would love for you to get back out in the world but, emotionally... I think if you go than you should at least agree to come with your father and me to see a therapist." Looking to her other sons she adds. "Your brothers will come as well."

Colt had to snicker at that, no way is he going to see a shrink. But seeing his mothers cold glare he stifles it back to nothing and finishes his peas with his eyes at the table. Nineteen or not nothing stills your blood faster than a cold glare from your mother.

Tum tum is indifferent about it. He'll do whatever it takes to get his brother back, than maybe be wouldn't feel so weird about asking him about what he's seen him do that day. "I'll go. It might be nice to talk to someone about my problems... it would give me a chance to air out some of my laundry."

The boys mother smiled at him. _That's my good boy._ She thinks.

Rocky snapped his hand away. Those words were so familiar he almost felt sick enough to vomit. Composing his self to relax, he knew that freaking out now would only serve to confirm that his mother is right about him not being ready to venture out yet. But he really is! He can't take walking around this place anymore, being locked up inside his house as well as his self. But it seems that to earn his freedom he has to do something in exchange- Tch! That's nothing new. So nodding, he agrees to go to therapy.

"I'll be leaving Monday. For now, I just wanna take a walk." He couldn't help but smile about being able to do it. But there was another problem. "Will someone come with me?"

"I'll go!" Tum tum shouted before he even realized what the question was. He wants to talk to Rocky and being alone in a place where there were no walls with ears is perfect. "Let me get my stuff."

"Okay." He smiled at his brothers enthusiasm. Its refreshing to know that he at least didn't bring everyone down with him. Turning his attention to his mother who seems to be putting on a brave face for him, he says. "Thank you, and I will got to therapy for you."

"With us sweet heart, you won't be alone."

"Yes, of course." Shoving his seat in, he walks out of the kitchen to retreave his sneakers.

Jessica can hear her youngest say that he's ready to leave before the front door pulled open. Colt looked over his shoulder to see that the two were gone before scooting over a chair and wrapping his arms around their mother. "I'm sorry mom." He says quietly. "I know it sucks but, this is something that's gonna take a while. Rocky is hurt, in fact he's been acting really strange, like since after the funeral for the other boys he's become immuned to emotional pain."

"What do you mean?"

Letting her go from the embrace, he shakes his head. "I don't know, but when Gretchen spoke to him last month he kind of snapped at her."

"What did he say?"

"That he wasn't in love with Maria- Gretch' only gave him a simple book. Then he demanded to know what she wanted from him before storming upstairs." Cocking his head from side to side he adds. "And I think something happened between him and Emily that day too, you remember how quickly she left."

"Yeah. It was almost like she couldn't wait to get away from him." Shrugs. "I thought they had a good relationship, that they would have made up after all those years."

"Guess not... Mom," he had to gather himself to say this next part, he didn't wanna rat on his brother but at the same time he knew it was too strange to keep to himself. "That friday when Gretchen came over I came home late, around 2o'clock."

"Colt." She sounded annoyed that her son was staying out late, knowing what happened to the family and that it could easily happen to him or Tum tum at any given time.

"I know, I'm sorry," he rushed out before saying. "But you don't understand, at two in the morning, I saw Rocky."

"What was he doing?"

"That's just it, it seemed like he was coming in the house- like he had been out."

That made Jessica shake a bit. "Bad enough he's been changed but now he's starting to sleep walk again."

Colt shook his head. "That's the thing, I don't think he was sleep walking- he actually sounded wide awake and he smelled funny... spoke weird too."

"Weird how?"

"I don't know, it was a while back but, he just sounded like he were..._ better_, much better and the Rocky we see in the house is just his way of faking it."

"But why would he fake it? Doesn't he think we want him happy?"

"Maybe he's confused. But," he stands from the table walking out of the kitchen. "I don't know, you'll have to find out. He did say he's gonna give therapy a try maybe he'll talk about it there."

"Maybe..."

_Evreything is the same. How can it be that way when I've changed so much?_ He wonders, looking at the area around him. Rocky and Tum tum walk side by side towards the park. Neither of them are saying anything but the air isn't sad or aggressive in anyway. But Rocky can sense that his brother wants to talk to him about something and has for some time. The only thing was how to get him to speak up. Maybe he could-...

"Rocky, if I told you about something... something that maybe I saw and wanted to know more about- would you get mad at me?"

"I won't get mad at you."

"That's good." He looked ahead of them, then to the left as if to avoid eye contact. "Because it kind of has to do with you."

"With me?"

"Yeah." It came out a lot quicker than he wanted to. "I mean, yeah... It's something that happened last month," he sticks his hands into his pockets. "...I saw you do something- and you don't have to say anything about it to me if you don't want to but just know that I know and you can tell me about it if you-"

"Tum just spit it out." He was sounding more like himself everyday.

Tum tum couldn't help but think that maybe he shouldn't bring it up, it might only make him revert back to that sad state of mind having to know that his little brother was spying on him during something personal.

"I saw you with Grandpa." He replied timidly but quick.

Rocky took a moment wondering what it was that his brother was talking about but then it dawned on him. "Oh... Well... It isn't as if I didn't want to tell you guys eventually... I just wasn't sure of how you would take it."

"I think it's cool- at first I was scared but... having time to think about it I really think its cool." He smiles up at him. Tum tum suddenly remembered a time when his older brothers were much bigger than him but no adays it seems like the kids in his generation are sprouting up more, in another year or two he may even pass them both in height, but for now he's only several or so inches off.

"Cool?" That seemed to make him think to himself for a while. Tum tum almost spoke again but his brother beat him to it. "...I thought that you all would hate me, I thought that- you better remember to buy cat food." He slapped a hand to his mouth.

"Huh?" Tum's face scrunched.

Rocky looked around for who the idiot was that was projecting so loudly to have made him say it when he spots a woman giving her husband a shopping list right before he leaves. "Uh, what I meant to say was, I thought that you would be afraid of me, maybe hate me."

"Why would I be afraid? Ha, you're my brother you wouldn't hurt me. I'd probably use you for my own lazy purposes." He smiled when his brother laughed at the thought. "But I would never be afraid."

The two of them passed through the park gate, walking over to an open bench. "Mom would be... she would call me a freak or a demon and send me away."

"Whose mom? Because I'm pretty sure that mom would just hug you- maybe call you an idiot for thinking she'd ever think that way about you."

Rocky scoffed at that. "When did you get to be so wise to the ways of the world."

"Why does everyone keep asking me that?" He snorts. "When you left, everyone was in pieces" shoving him on the arm with his elbow he says. "I found my inner _you _to calm everyone down."

"Your inner me, huh?" They were silent.

His little brother began to figit a bit, before he spoke up to say. "So... how long have you been doing that? Did... did Maria give you that?" He knew her name was a taboo subject but he had so many questions.

"No. I think I've been doing it all my life at least, that's what my dreams tell me." He clentched his fist in his hand. "When I was a little kid, I used to come to the park and gather a pile of rocks to play with" he cast his blue eyes at the envious sky. "I would just focus on them and they would go flying, it was a lot of fun."

"I'll bet."

"I met up with a boy, we played together... He kind of asked me how I did that and that's when I realized that not everybody could." His fist got tighter, but Tum tum held his hand to make him stop, easing his grip he goes on to say. "I think his mother saw us one time and she yanked him home, that's when I knew I was different. I wanted to tell mom and dad about it but he snapped at me so badly when I told him about the others that I just couldn't say anything."

"I kinda remember that day; I thought it was so weird that dad would just yell at you for no reason. You never do anything wrong."

"I try not to, but I screw up a lot believe me." Looking at his lap, he sighs. "Since then I've been keeping them locked up inside, I guess I did okay about it since I completely forgot all about them until last year when... Maria opened up a lot of things in my life that I thought were gone- she wanted me to be like her so we could use our abilities and not feel ashamed of them but I don't wanna live like that- I don't want to be different when I worked so hard to be normal!" His emotional flare up snapped a small branch from a tree before them.

Tum tum looked at it with wonder if his brother had done it or was it a simple coinsidence? Knowing that his brother can do such things is rather odd but, its nothing they can't handle. The Douglas' can take on anything. Rocky had to know that. "So why not just shove them away again."

"That's just it, I can't. I don't even know how I managed to do it in the first place and now... I'm throwing things whenever I have a memory effect my emotions, I hear people talking in my head and sometimes I feel like they're my own thoughts but I know they're not- at least I do after I've thought them and sometimes acted them out."

"...This is all so strange." He shakes his head, brown bangs brushing across his forehead in the action. "But Rocky... I'm here for you. I don't know what I can do but I'd like to help if I can."

"Then keep my secret Tum," he looks at him deadly serious. "I'm so glad that you're okay with me being this way but I can't risk the pain that will come with Mom or dad finding out. Do you agree?"

"I won't tell. I promise."

Rocky looked at his brother as if to find out whether or not he's lying to him, but he can tell his little brother is honest. "Thank you."

"What are brother's for. And speaking of being for something, how about getting me a couple donuts later."

"Tum tum you're such a glutton."

His brother laughed. "I am not," he gives him a playful shove. When Rocky didn't respond and instead just stared blankly into the distance he thought he might have said something wrong- or that Rocky might be having a seizor. "Rocky?"

He can see something... it seems recent though... like it might have happened just last night even. He's surrounded by people, blinking lights swirling, music... Where is he?

**_Sin huh? Well what Sin are you? _**Asks an unfamiliar voice.

**_Gluttony. _**He hears his voice say. **_Care to let me have a taste._**

"Rocky!" He shouted while shaking him.

Snapping out of it, he blinks. "Uh... I'm sorry. What were you saying?"

"Are you ok? You just kind of spaced?"

"Yeah, I'm fine I was just... watching tv."

"Huh?" He looks forward to where his brother was staring but saw nothing. "Huh?"

_What could that flash have meant? Is Sin, getting out when I sleep? No. He can't that's insane, I have to permit him to do so and I'm sure that he will listen to me. So than what? What?_

"...Say Rocky?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you really plan on going to therapy?"

"If I have to, I'd rather not though."

"It won't be so bad. Trust me."

"I will."

"Robbie is your roommate, you remember?"

"Hard to forget."

"Do you plan on sharing a room with him still, I don't think mom would like that but... He helped us find you and I feel sorry for the guy but at the same time he's the one who put you there by doing what he did- at least that's what Colt thinks."

"What did he do?"

"Ran you off... he..." Tum tum suddenly decided to clam up. He wasn't about to say that to his brother it might embarrass him.

"You can say it; Robbie kissed me and I took off." With a shrug he adds. "No big deal."

"I think its a big deal. A guy kissed you." Rocky was silent. "Don't tell me? Rocky, you didn't like it did you?"

"I don't remember it, I mean, I heard about it but I don't remember it."

"Oh." They are both silent for a bit. "Do you think he'd try something again?"

"No. He came to see me last month and I told him to back off, but we could still be friends because he did after all save my life- sort of."

"Oh."

Again they're silent but the air is thick with questions from both boys. Taking a sigh, Rocky chose to go first by saying. "Tum tum, if I were into guys- and this is hypothetically speaking, would you hate me?"

"No. I'd think it was strange but like I said you're my brother and that means more to me than who you're in to."

"Hn. You know you're okay for a kid."

"I'm NOT a kid. I'm growing up more everyday. I've got a drivers test coming up."

"Yeah and you have yet to pass it squirt hahaha." He shoves his brothers playfully.

"Oh yeah right!" He shoves him back. Hopping off the bench, he stands before him hands balled up. "Hey rocky, how 'bout making something come to you."

"Tum tum." He groans. "I told you I don't know how I'm doing it, but... maybe I could." He looks around. "I don't see anything I can grab."

"Try that stick," he points.

Rocky focused on it a bit then the broken branch came flying into his waiting hands. Tum tum nearly gav him a heart attack shouting about how cool it was, before snatching the stick throwing it further away saying 'fetch!' at which point Rocky popped him one. Talking to his little brother made him feel so much better about everything and his happiness was definitely contageous. If only the two of them had known they were being watched, they wouldn't have been so half hazzardly about their fun. A delicate hand moves from the iron gate and the young woman got back into her car.


	9. State Your Name

A.N: I couldn't remember if I said the Douglas brothers middle names so I might be making changes to this chapter sometime in the future when I check back on it. Aaaand, any other mistakes I've made will be changed too. That's all. Thank you reading, I hope your liking it so far because man its tough to do trilogies hahaha. Enjoy the chapter.

Chapter 9.

"I hope you understand that, for me to understand someone I have to understand the people around them." Says a very well chizzled man sitting behind a wide wooden desk. It looks to be very expensive.

"I can understand that." Says the person he's talking to.

"And to understand the people around them," says the thick vioce. "I have a better understanding of what's going on."

He said insistantly. "I know."

"Than why, Mr. Douglas, are you so upset?"

"Well, Dr. Maxim I can't stand these things- therapy is for whack-jobs and I'm not exactly one of them."

"We're not here to talk about you, we're here to discuss your brother through your eyes; his changes, things about him that have stayed the same, such like that."

The Douglas child shifts bitterly. "Does Rocky know about this?"

"It's better they don't know, so that they won't see fit to try and pursued the conversations about them."

"Oh..." He twiddled his impatient thumbs together. "So where should I start."

"Start by telling me your name?"

With a bitter sigh, the Douglas boy says. "My name is Jeffrey, Christian, Aberu Douglas." After a second thought he adds. "But my friends call me, Colt."

"And you're here to talk about?" He set the tape recorder closer to the edge of the desk so it would pick up Jeffrey's voice.

"My brother Rocky."

"Very good. Start by telling me the differences he's been through with yourself personally these last two months, today being February 26."

"Lets see... When Rocky got home he was different alright, not just by how quiet he was but by the way he looked. I thought he was wearing hair extensions but it grew out so much which sucks because I've been trying to grow mine forever and only managed a ears length hahaha." Dr. Maxim tapped his pencil on the desk. "Right. Anyway, for the most part he was just quiet, he did everything anyone told him to do and sometimes... he would follow me around the house- me or our little brother, who we call Tum."

"As for personally effecting me he did have somewhat of an effect because he was making me angry."

"How was he doing that?"

"It was the way he was treating mom, he was talking to everyone and trying to be normal- I could tell, but when it came to mom he was cold and kept shoving her away or telling her to leave him alone." Colt scrunched his eyes. "It pisses me off even now thinking about it, how many times she cried when he was gone just to come home and treat her as though she were the woman who had done it to him."

"Is it possible he has a bad association with women now that this has happened?" Asks the doctor. "It is very common in cases of abduction that one often ditaches theirself from the memory by any means necessary."

Colt rolls his eyes to the ceiling in thought. "I guess thats a possiblity, but our own mother? She would never hurt him."

"He knows that, but he was with the woman for some time going through a terrfying ordeal, at least that's what the media has been saying. Has your brother seen the evidence pulled from the remains of the home?"

"No. He stopped watching the news a long time ago because they were starting to make up nasty lies about the family."

"Did you hear them? How did they effect you?"

"They made me mad... Like I could hit someone."

"Your brother?"

Colt shrugged. He didn't wanna say, _yes_, because even though its true he didn't want it to be played back to his brother because it would hurt his feelings, but if he said, no, odds are this quack would know that he was lying. So he chose to 'pass' and went on talking about Rocky's changes.

"So anyway, Rocky began to tell everyone that he was fine; I believed him, he even started being nice to mom again- it was creepy how obedient he was with her though and he always seemed to look like he were ready for her to hit him if he did something wrong. but I don't know, I've never been good at reading people or big speeches for that matter but when it comes down to it I selfishly wanted him to be alright so that he would stop getting so much attention."

"Attention?"

"From the media, from mom, from dad- he doesn't even know the things dad has seen and told us about. The L.A.P.D has been working with the Canadian forces on the case so that this kind of thing will never happen again." Colt shook his head. "And Rocky doesn't seem to care about any of it. He's either being secretive or too attentive."

"I see. So you think with every step forward he takes two back?" He shifts in his seat.

Colt nods. "I think it's more like ten steps." He was quiet for a moment, then with sad eyes he looks up and says. "I really don't hate my brother, I just think life is better when there are no problems, ya know? Like everything can be put away into a nice little box and forgotten with enough time."

"You know that isn't always the case with a lot of things."

"I know... But still, having this negative energy running around our home isn't good for anyone."

"I heard he moved back to the dorms at school?"

Again Colt nods. "But truthfully, I think he only did that to make everyone stop worrying about him because he hardly seems fine to me, especially with all the sleep walking he's doing lately."

"Sleep walking?"

"Rocky used to sleep walk when he was younger but after a while he stopped for a good long time, now he's doing it again. I think its because of the nightmares myself, but I don't know. I caught him in the act of coming home one night when I was out on a late date, and he wasn't acting like his self- he talked differently, kind of like he was faking his trauma the whole time."

"Do you think he is?"

"...I'm not sure. Maybe." He chewed on his bottom lip. "All I know is that things still aren't so great at home, mom is even more worried about him now that he's at school again, but she made him promise to come home every weekend and eventually he would be talking to you."

"I'll see him by March."

Colt again nods. "I haven't seen Rocky sneaking around any other times than then, but he's been really tired when he wakes up- like he never slept at all."

"He could be sleep walking because his mind and body are reverting back to a time when things weren't complicated and he didn't have to worry about his troubles of now. It could very well be a way to relieve his trauma, by taking these walks in his sleep."

"I don't understand any of that, but he never seems happy, he just seems confused like he's always thinking." Standing, he grabs his back pack, since he was pulled out of school for this. "Is that all? Because I'd kind of like to go bck to school now."

"Yes, that's all and thank you Jeffrey, you were a big help."

"Yeah, yeah." He muttered. "Promise me one thing, though."

"What's that?"

"That you'll make my brother better and not worse. I've seen what happens to people who don't take to therapy first hand and... I don't wanna see that same thing happen to my brother."

"I'll try my best."

"No. You'll do it." With that he walked out of the room pulling the door closed after him. He didn't have time for this, and hoped he wouldn't have to do it again when it was Rocky's turn. Last thing he wants is to bombbard his brother with all this pent up frustration towards him. Because if there was a chance at all that he would end up like _her_ he didn't want it to happen, he couldn't live with it. Getting on the elevator, he had to wonder what his brother was doing right now.

Rocky is sitting at the desk in his old dorm room working on an assignment given to them last fall when he went absent for a while. He knew he didn't have to do it because he already had enough credits to be done with the class all together, but he needed as many distractions as he could get, so doing old work and turning it in has become his best friend since he got back at the start of this month. Nothing has changed in the place except for a few things here and there and, oh yeah, he himself. Robbie seemed to be on cloud nine now that Rocky was back and told him that he wanted to keep him as a roommate, that he was the only person in the school that really got him and wouldn't judge him should he do something on accident while sleeping.

Rocky was very thankful for the people who knew about his secret and agreed to keep it until he was ready to tell the family. Tum tum and him joked around that day and had a really relaxing lunch together. He wished he could say the same for Colt but lately it seemed like his first brother was mad at him, he wouldn't blame him though, because even if Tum tum is the one who most ressembles their mother Colt by far favors her over their father. It's like that with most families, Rocky favors their grandfather and Tum tum their father. He never shows it but he actually loves the man enough to complain about what he says but never once thinks to break the rule laid down. Even he wanted to bend their fathers rules once in a while, something he figured came from Sin.

Thinking about him always makes Rocky's head hurt and he tried his hardest not to, but dammit, he really had to know a lot of things about him. He was pretty sure that deep down that is why he decided to go to therapy because then maybe the man could help him understand his alter and hopefully send him away. Sin is too much of a lose cannon and he was almost positive now that the male was sneaking out whenever he could because someone said they had seen him last night and Rocky never left the room as far as he knew. There was a chance that his sleep walking had come back but it seemed unlikely.

_I really couldn't care less if Sin was sneaking out at night because who knows, maybe someday I could get strong enough to wake up and take control and see just what it is he's been up to. I don't want him throwing my body around like its a toy what has he got to lose, he's just a figment of my imagination._ He looks out the window. _I've never had an imaginary friend before, I've actually never known anyone who has so I can't get help in that department. The only person I ever knew that started talking to theirself was Paula and I can't drag her through those memories just to help myself._

The door opens. Rocky turns his head. It's Robbie. The boy waved a hand at him before going into the bathroom stripping his clothes off as he went. The two of them have developed an odd relationship. Robbie backs off with the flirting and Rocky pretends that day never happened. That being established they get along in a peaceful sort of understanding about their living arrangement. Rocky isn't doing it because he has a thing for the male, its purely out of the fact that he can't stay with anyone else. And Robbie, though he told Rocky his feelings weren't just infatuation he swore that he wouldn't act on them or make him uncomfortable in any way.

_Get back to work, slacker._ He ordered his self. Looking down at his paper, he raised the pencil but placed it back down. "This isn't going anywhere anymore." Standing, he walks over to his bed, laying down. Reaching for the remote that they keep on the side table between the beds, Rocky turned on the small television. This is one of the new things that Robbie added to the room, another silent conversation Rocky had with his self; he could guess that the brunet was concerned about him and wanted to check the news for updates. Understandable.

"Cartoons. No. Animal Planet?" He paused on it for a while. "No... Here we go; music." MTV is playing music from the early nineties to the twenties and they're on some old girl group that he was pretty sure has broken up by now, but then again he never paid as much attention to music as Colt always has. Colsing his eyes he hums along to the music of the song, which is what he chose to hear, he always tends to ignore the actual singing. When that song ended another one started by a group he wasn't sure of but something about the music seemed so familiar to him. Where has he heard it before?

_I am lost in a cloud,_

_Through the trees I see peace,_

_If I land will I sleep in the darkness of defeat?_

_Lost butterfly...ay, ay, lost butterfly, hhhooo, ay._

Rocky didn't notice that his hand was slipping into his pants as he listened to this familiar song, down into his boxers and over his manhood. His breathing hitched when his cold hand touched the warmth of his crotch, body shivered for a second before his palm gave back as much heat that it latched onto.

_Can't make out your- dizzy path_

_You follow me though you know it won't last,_

_what are you looking for, do you know or ignore_

_I can't hold on to you... and through me your life is through, oh._

_Lost butterfly, fly high, lost butterfly, hooo, ay._

His jerks begin to hasten and his mouth was near moans, he didn't even hear the bathroom door open to know that Robbie had come back into the room.

"Rocky?"

He snapped out of his trance, hand pulling away from him as though it were on fire. "Robbie?" He pants to catch his lost breaths. "Wh- what? What are you?"

"We're out of soap and I planned to head out to the store." Fully dressed the boy walked to the door, watching Rocky the whole time. "Are you ok?"

"Yes."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I was just... remembering."

"I'll be back in ten minutes tops, unless-.."

"I don't wanna go with you. I'll be fine and if I start to get nervous or anything I'll go to the library."

"Okay. Ten minutes."

Rocky nods. When the door is closed, he lays back on the bed with a huff. _That song? Who were they? What does it mean to me? My past, its the only thing that's gonna help my future._

"Aah! Aaahhh!!! Please no more!" The man groaned. "Aaahh!!" He cried out when his partner pulled roughly out.

"Your no fun." Spat the male on top. Sitting back against the head board, he grumbled about how people these days never have any respect for a good days romp session, and they should work on their stamina.

"I'm sorry, maybe next time?" The man continued to pant, rocking back and forth on his stomach smooshing his face into the pillow.

"I don't give next times. Toooo baaaad." He mocked.

"Come on Sin, your not being fair."

"Stop bitching, ugh," he groaned. "You sound just like my stupid twin brother. Waah, waah, waah." Sin slipped out of bed going over to the chair he tossed his clothes onto. "I'm going downstairs, don't look for me." Getting into his clothes, he salutes to the man before taking off.

Sin decided that **Heat Wave **was the club for him. The faces are usually always nice, and the bouncers were his best friends, plus the guy at the bar understood that he hated to drink. What more could you ask for in a hang out? As for what went on up there, Sin didn't often do; once in a while he would find someone too cute to resist and he would taunt him by getting close enough to touch but never enough to give them anything until the guy was practically screaming notice me! At which point he would come over ask him the usual blether and they would go to the small hotel above the club. Sin never does bottoms and he never gives it to anyone twice, he doesn't do cuddles or kisses and he never sticks around for longer than maybe fifteen minutes at best. It's not exactly the best way to live but how else can he live the life he wants? Plus he's very careful and always uses protection.

The blond couldn't believe that Rocky had the balls to move back into the dorms with that Robbie kid. He knew it would happen because the more he comes out the more of himself he leaves in his charges brain. Pretty soon Rocky will be the spitting image of him and there isn't going to be anything anyone can do about it. Therapy worried him at first but there was no way some guy could break his barriers to the secrets he walled up inside the ninjas head. He's too powerful, no one can stop him. No one. Even if Rocky does somehow figure out how to manage his abilities he'll never use them enough to be at his level. Ha, Maria wasn't even at his level and that is why she feared him, wanted him dead. The thought of trying to control someone who could crush her with just the bat of a lash scared her to-... well, He could guess she already did that part.

Kind of ironic that woman whom could fry your brains got fried herself. Sin began to laugh about that as he sits down at the bar. "The usual." He says.

"Coming up." Says Andre the bartender. "I'm actually surprised you weren't down here sooner, we could hear that guy over the music." He teased.

"Whatever." The younger male punched the guy on the shoulder.

"Are you gonna be here tomorrow, this one guy has been asking about you but he couldn't come today."

"Wow, I have a waiting list- how do I stand it." He rolled his eyes. "I can't come tomorrow, it's the weekend and we start family therapy for my idiot brother."

"Hey. Your brother is a hero, you shouldn't make fun of him."

"I can if I want to; I'm so sick of playing the evil twin to that guy."

"So stop playing, be the good guy and reap the parental rewards." He smiled.

"Ha ha. I've come to far to earn any _parental rewards _and besides I don't want them. I'm my own person and I'll lead my own life." He scratches the side of his neck.

"Here, here." Andre held a glass of whisky up in the air.

"Here, here." Sin raised his glass of root beer up to it.

Taking a drink, he sets the glass down and nods. "You think maybe someday I could talk to your brother?"

"Why would you wanna do that?" Sin couldn't believe how easily these people went for the twin brother thing. The crowd has slowly began to recognize him from the posters and comercials they used to see not to mention to pictures of him on the news back when he was found. And noticing how long it took them to figure out that he looked like the victim it wasn't a wonder that it took them so long to find him. But after one quick reassurance they were convinced that he was merely an identical twin, plus his eyes are green Rocky's are blue. Very different.

"I don't know, I think the guy is a hero. He saved that little girl, could have saved them all if it weren't for the fire."

"He could have easily gotten that little girl frozen to death if the cops hadn't shown up," he snarled. "And he couldn't have saved the others because all but one were already dead."

"He told you that?"

"Let's just say our connection is deeper than any trauma, he tells me everything." Sin was cracking up inside. How can these people be so dumb?!

"Well, if you don't mind asking him we could meet somewhere quiet like a library or his house."

"No! You're not allowed at my parents house. He'll meet you at the library next week. I'll talk him into it." A grin spread across his face.

"Thanks man."

"No problem."

"Sin! Hey Sin!" Someone shouted at his left side.

Turning, he asks. "What?!"

"A guy is giving tat's you should get one!"

Sin thought that over. Does he really wanna give himself away. As far as he knows Rocky doesn't have a clue about his nightly ventures so why alert him to them. Shaking his head, he says. "Not today, maybe some other time alright!"

"Alright, see ya around!" He pats him on the shoulder.

Seeing the bartender grinning like a madman, Sin cocks his head. "What?"

"Nothing, nothing. I just think it's sweet that you won't stain yourself with taint is all."

"How do you mean?"

"You don't drink, smoke, get tattoo's."

"I already said I would just not today." He took a long swig of his fizzy drink then put the glass down. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going dancing."

"Alright. Don't do the forbidden dance though, you might get into trouble."

Sin flipped him off before turning away and finding someone to dance with. Since he moved out the fun loving young man could stay out as long as he wanted, who could stop him? Certainly not Robbie who fell asleep not soon after the mini television went off. That was a new feature in the room, probably the only new thing Robbie added to it and he probably got that to watch the news to see if his beloved Rocky was alright. He could spit on him. Sin would gladly take Robbie but chances are the jerk is all hung up on Rocky and considers him a promiscuous weirdo. But at least the boy seemed to be onto him, the fact that he exsists that is. No one else seemed to notice Rocky's sudden odd behavior but him, so maybe the boy would be good for a few things in the near future but who was to say.

"Watch it!" He snaps at some guy that bumped into him. He was about to continue dancing when he saw flashes. That man. In a room. with some poor kid that looked too young to be in a club. Then a body, no longer able to move. _Well I can't let this go on_. He thinks turning on his heals to go after the guy. sin may be a lot of bad things, but he would never back down to protect someone dear to him and over the month and half he's been coming here he considers even new guys his family. "Hey! Buddy! Come back here!"

The man turned around with a tight, bitter look on his face, but when he saw who was calling him he smiled. "Hi. Wanna dance?"

"No. I wanna go upstairs." He said getting right to the point. "I know the owner, got my own special room."

"Ahahaha, well look at you. You must be one hot piece."

"You know it."

"Alright, let's go upstairs." He holds out a hand. "What's your name?"

"Sin."

"Ohhh, and what _sin _are you?"

"Today... Today I think I'll with-" _Wrath_. "Pride. I'm feel like I'm about to get lucky with you."

That night Sin returned to the dorms, laughing and singing a tune. That man who went by the name of Jason Schwartz is now going by the name of Chelsea Patterson, a fifteen year old that just got raped by a group of very big, very ugly men. It was amazing what the mind will believe to be true when it has enough influence. Sin supposed his spell would wear off someday but until then may that man who planned to kill one of his friends live in a mental hell for as long as he lived.


	10. My Name is

Chapter 10.

Tum tum figits nervously in the comfortable armchair of the psychologists office. He wasn't really all that nervous about talking to him, he has no secrets but... talking about his brother is another thing all together but Dr. Maxim said that they would all be sitting around talking and listening to Rocky when its his turn unless he request otherwise.

"State your name please?"

"Oh... I go by Tum tum, sometimes, but my full name is Michael Alexander, Omi Douglas." After a second thought he adds. "Sixteen."

"Mmhmm." He smiled at the boys sentiment.

"Where should I start? From when Rocky got back or just anywhere?"

"Wherever you're comfortable."

"Okay... Well, since he's been back I've noticed maybe two things about him." Says the boy. "One, he's really bad at faking things, because you'd have to be some kind of moron to believe my brother when he says he's fine. Two he's been acting really weird because of it all- before he went back to school he used to talk to his self not quietly like most people forgetting things on a shopping list but... just period. Whole conversations and he'd tell someone to shut up out of nowhere! ...I asked him once what was wrong and he said that he had a headache and didn't feel like talking."

"Does he get headaches often?"

"I'm not sure about any of the times when he was at school before all this happened but since he came home he's been asking for aspirin non-stop. But he's so polite about everything, this I'm blaming on Maria." He makes sure to say. "That bitch- can I swear?"

The man nods.

"That bitch probably made him do all kinds of things he didn't want to and knowing Rocky he wouldn't hit a girl not unless he really had to. The first time he ran her off was by luck of her insanity. He talked her down and then she had a major meltdown and took off running."

Again Dr. Maxim nods.

"Well, aside from all of that I'd say he's improved; he's nicer to mom, he spoke more... I think deep down he's just hoping to walk back into life without people throwing his troubles into his face, that's why he wanted to go back to school so soon. The dean said he could take the year off but he didn't want to. I think being locked up in the house was getting to him."

"Understandable when he's been confined for such a long time."

"Yeah. So anyway, as far as his effect on the house my other brother- Colt, you talked to him, his mood has gotten better since Rocky has gone to school. Mom worries all the time and Dad he's been working so hard on the case that I think he's using it as an excuse to get away from his own fears of Rocky being messed up."

Dr. Maxim was amazed at how polite and insightful this young boy is. He would make a great psychiotrist one day. "Can you tell me if there's anything about your brother that hasn't changed?"

Tum tum had to think about that for a moment. Over the days he's seen many sides of his brother that he didn't know exsisted, things like: insecurity, timid personality, quiet... there are a lot of things! But syff that's stayed the same... "He likes the same drinks," Tum shrugged. "I guess the same music and he's been reading a lot."

"Alright. How about relationships, has he tried exstablishing any since his return?"

That made the young Douglas think about what Rocky had said to him at the park, about the possibility of him being unloved if he swung the other way. He told him of course not but after a second thought, it kind of creeped him out. Rocky isn't girly in anyway and has a good build. Will he seek out a boy with opposite of that? He had to scratch his brain at thoughts of that. Shaking his head, he says. "Not really. His old girlfriend, Emily Heart stopped by in January."

"How did that go?"

Tum tum shrugged. "I don't know, they used to be good friends until Maria came along and broke them up... Emily practically ran from the house after we got home from school though. I thought she'd stay and visit for a while but no... Rocky looked upset too, almost guilty of something."

Dr. Maxim wrote something down on a notepad. "Your brother told me that your father has shown you things from the case. How did that make you feel?"

"Angry. Like I could hit someone."

Dr. Maxim smiled. "You and your brother think a lot alike."

"Oh yeah," he chuckled at the thought of thinking even a little bit like Colt. "Well, there were... bad things... things the media would die to get their hands on and if any of it got out Rocky would die."

"What kinds of things, and know that you have the option not to tell me anything."

"I know... I'll tell you this though... My brother has been hurt by her a lot, and those pictures we saw showed only a pink worth of what it was like for him." He looks at his lap, tears coming to his eyes. "Why did she have to be sick in the head, why did she have to take him? I thought pedophiles only wanted kids."

"This woman was sick, she had an obsession with your brother I imagine. That's probably why she pursued him for so long." He pulls a tissue from the box in his drawer then hands it over to the child.

"Thanks... Don't tell anyone I was crying, alright?" He tried to smile off his tears. "I just get so mad about everything. I had a lot of growing up to do, and I didn't notice how much until all of this happened and I had to step in and be... well... Rocky. He has so much weight on his shoulders being the oldest. He not only looks after us, but he looks after Mom and even dad! But who looks out for him? I know we all share this kind of silent agreement to make sure the other is safe but... I don't know, I guess we've all somehow slacked off on our duties."

Tum tum and Dr. Maxim were quiet for a long time. Neither knowing what to say from that point on. Maxim could guess that Michael was thinking about the pictures and his brothers pain, while he is thinking about something close to that. how he is gonna bring this boy back to his family when, judging by what they've said, they have no clue whom he really is. But he'll do his best.

"That will be all Michael. Thank you."

Tum nodded and stood up; extending a hand to the man, he gives it a firm shake before walking out of the room.

_Samuel Douglas becomes more interesting as the story plays on_. Thinks Maxim. _I'll have to be sure to go in carefully when we speak. I don't wanna hurt this family in any way but... at the same time... I'm not really sure if I have the means to help him and this is my job. But I simpathize with the boy... my son was taken from me when he was seven and I never... I never got him back_. A tear rolled down his cheek as he looked at a picture hidden in his top desk drawer of a young boy, blond hair and a sweet smile.

Rocky lay in bed, hands behind his head, legs bent. He's decided to skip classes today because he's been feeling the effects of a severe headache. Why is he getting so many lately? Is Sin so eager to get out? Or maybe it's a tumor from all the strain over the past months. Rocky's even noticed a massive amount of gray hairs in his head from the over excerted use of his abilities that have been stunted for so long. Rolling over onto his side he curls up into a ball, eyes scrunched in pain as another headache comes on. Practically ripping the desk in half he reaches for a bottle of headache medicine to somewhat sooth his pains. Tears stain his cheeks as he drops his head back to toss the pills down. He's never had luck with taking pills and would often spit them out or hide them in applesause or some other loose food to make it easier but with so many headaches he's now taking them like an old pro. Robbie went to class and said he'd skip his third and stay with him to make sure he's alright. He didn't need babysitting, he's fine! But right now he would kind of like a hand to hold until this headache passes.

A low knock on the door caught his attention. Just looking he wasn't sure if he wanted to say 'come in' or just leave whomever that is out there since it apparently isn't his roommate.

"Rocky?"

_Whose voice is_-... Shaking his head, he sits up; slowly he exhales feeling the headache leaving. "Come in." He says figuring that the person wasn't going to go away since they insisted on knocking for so long. The knocking stopped, but the door remained shut. Looking at the door for a long while, he slid off the bed and walked over to it pulling it open once he reached the knob. Looking from left to right down the hall he was somewhat surprised to see that it is empty. _Who could have been knocking if no one is here? _He wondered, hand on his chin. Closing the door behind him, he locks it before starting down the hall, first at a walk which turned into a quick step which then turned into a complete run. He wasn't crazy there was someone at the door and if that someone is Maria than...! _Stop thinking things like that_! He barks at himself while reaching the elevator. _She's dead! You know she's dead you had to identify her at the autopsy. You saw a burnt woman and Al stuck to her_... Stepping onto the elevator a young man joined him almost as if he just materialized out of nowhere.

Breathing hard, he presses his back against the elevator wall, glad for company. At least until his company pressed the 'emergancy stop' button. Reaching for it, the man stepped into Rocky's path.

"Who are you?" He asked with a hint of anger in his voice. "Were you the one knocking on my door just now?"

The man shook his head, red bangs brushing his forehead as he does so. "Your father asked me to follow you. Remember?"

Rocky nods. He knew his father got someone to follow him but this guy looked like he was fresh out of prison; his attire youthful as though it were his way of blending in on campus, hair slicked back to a shine and he's built in the arms and legs with a height that surpassed Rocky's by a good foot. He hates being 5'9". As for the mans voice, its low and secretive. Rocky doesn't like him one bit.

"Why did you stop the elevator though?" He had to know.

"Because I wanted to introduce myself to you."

"Why?"

"Incase something happened, I wouldn't wanna get kicked in the nuts because you think I'm trying to hurt you."

_That makes sense. I'd for sure have to apprehend a shady character like him if I saw him just walking around everywhere I went_. Thinks the ninja, still uncertain of the mans words.

_Poor kid, he's really freaked out. Sam wasn't joking when he said his sons nerves were unstable_.

Rocky blinked hearing his fathers name. Standing down, he rest his back against the elevator wall again. _I've gotta stop freaking out inside. Just showing control outside isn't enough, I have to be fine for everyone's sake and mine_.

"My name is Trent Forbes." He holds out a hand.

Shaking it, Rocky nods. "Samuel, but every calls me-..."

"Rocky. I know."

There is silence. "...So, how's the patrol been going?"

"Good. So far I've only seen students eying you but it's mostly girls with some hungry look in their eyes."

Rocky blushed. He hates attention. Which is why male company is so much better, there's no chance any of them would fall for you at some point- well, Robbie excluded. But it's sometimes hard to make male friends when they hate your status with women.

"I did, though, see a reporter speaking to three kids. I think they may have heard about you being back at school."

"That's fine. I can always avoid talking to the press you know."

Trent shook his head. Rocky shrugged with a bit of confusion of how to explain his feelings. Some journalist he turned out to be. Trent pressed the button so the elevator would move again and they are taken to the first floor. Just as Rocky began to leave, his body guard pulled him back by the elbow.

"You said someone was at your door," he asked. "Did you see who it was?"

"No... Did you?"

"I didn't see anyone, just you coming out into the hall."

_That's weird_. Pulling his arm free he walks into the hall; Trent following suit. Rocky glanced over his shoulder every now and then as he made for the exit but he stopped at the door without pushing it open.

"Do you plan on following me to the library?"

"It is my job."

Rocky would still rather have the man keep his presence unknown but whatever. If someone really was knocking on his door and it wasn't just paranoid dellusions brought on by his headache than he could use the upclose and personal company of his bodt guard or anyone for that matter!

Rocky must have read that entire book by the time it was the late evening. Getting out of his seat, he stretches his arms into the air then sighs. "That was a good book. I'd recommend it." He says to his body guard. Looking around for a clock he questions. "What time is it?"

"It's six fif-..."

"Hey!" A familiar voice calls from across the room; both men turn their heads watching as Robbie approached. "Who the hell are you?" He demands.

"Excuse me?" Trent suddenly took on a very young and innocent tone.

"Rocky are you okay?" Asks Robbie. "This guy wasn't bothering you was he?"

"Why would he be?" Inquires the male. "Because he's not you? Calm yourself, Robbie, this guy is my friend."

"It's just that when I didn't see you in the room, I sort of freaked out."

"I told you I'd be at the library if I got nervous or anything."

"I know but I forgot that and paniced, I came running down as soon as I remembered." He continued to eye Trent. "Then I see this shady looking guy hanging around you, I just assumed."

"Well, I don't need anyone's help when it comes to defending myself." Rocky said very assuradly. "I'm perfectly fine being alone but... I don't, listen I'll tell you later okay? Let's just get something to eat, I'm beat."

"Okay." He started after Rocky's lead, keeping close watch on the man at the table until they were out of site.

Dinner was a box of Yakisoba from the chinese place not far from campus. The two filled up on it while watching reruns of Seinfeld just to pass some time. Taking quick showers they climbed into bed early, ready to call it a night around nine after American Idol. Silent, Rocky looked up at the ceiling. Many things ran through his mind: Things he'd do tomorrow, people he'd be sure to talk to since they were kind enough to write him, as odd as they were, some kind of letter saying they're glad he's back. He put off too many things for too long. Sometimes he felt like he would never catch up with his own life as it should be right now. He'd never be invited to a party without someone asking him if he's okay. He'd never walk outside period without someone asking him if he's alright, or telling him that he was very brave for helping those kids. If only there was a way to sate everybodies needs.

"Robbie?"

"Yeah?"

"...Do I seem ok to you?"

"...Sometimes and other times... you just seem like you're trying not to break down."

Rocky didn't respond to that, he just continued looking at the ceiling. "Did you knock on the door earlier today then leave?"

"No. Why would I, I have a key."

"Oh."

Sitting up on his elbow he asks. "Why was someone here?"

"I'm not sure," his voice was low, almost sleepy. "I could have been imagining it. I've been taking a lot of headache medicine lately."

"Don't over do it on those things, though." Pleads the other male. "I've known too many people who have died from overdose."

"I'm not a junkie, I know how to limit myself and just fight through the pain."

They were silent again.

"Robbie? ...Do you think that... tonight... I could sleep with you."

"Huh?" He surely hadn't heard right, his not so secret crush just asked to sleep with him? He's gotta be imagining it.

"It's not what you're thinking, I just... I don't feel like I can be trusted sleeping on my own tonight." By that he meant he could feel Sin scratching at his brain like he were laying down on his head trying to get comfortable. Rocky doesn't want to be taken over and moved around while he sleeps, he just wants a good nights rest so he isn't tired for classes. Teachers aren't always sympathetic to your problems even ones as major as a flashback of a horrible few months.

"O-...kay. Climb in." He opens the blanket for him.

"I'm gonna use my own." He says getting up from the bed, wrapped in the blanket he lays down. "Don't try anything funny, though."

"I won't."

Rocky eyed him in the darkness for a moment, but figured he could trust him. Robbie's done nothing so far since his return, so he is sure he can trust him to be this close. "Good night."

"Good night." He could hardly keep his smile back. The two fell fast asleep but Rocky didn't know what dream awaited him this night.


	11. This Dream Is So Real

Chapter 11.

_Rocky is sitting in the corner of a dark and sufficating room. His eyes are squeezed shut and he's crying. He can see himself as though from the second or third person in a movie. His young self curled into a ball in a strange room, crying._

_"You're leaving, right now!" He hears a male voice say to him._

_Opening his eyes, he doesn't get the chance to catch a glimpse of who is speaking to him because he turns his face away from his view; but his hair is blond, shiny and pulled into a tight bundle of curls atop his head looking strangly out of place on him._

_"I'm scared." He hears his self say. "I'm scared! I don't wanna go!" He then shouted only to have a hand brush the side of his face._

_"I know you're scared," just as he turned to face him he hides his face back in his small hands. "But Sam we have to get out of here, and you'll be fine after this. I promise."_

_"Do you really promise?" He removes his hands just in time to be jerked from the floor and down the hall of the home._

_**That music?**__ Thinks the unconscious sleeping form of the boy. __**Its that same song from the video; lost butterfly.**_

_Young Rocky and this strange boy run down the hall at warp speed. He banged his shoulder painfully on the rim of one of the doorways._

_**I remember my arm hurting me one morning. I had no clue what happened... Did I sleep walk and hurt myself?**_

_A door is shoved open and he's pushed almost violently to the streets._

_"Now go home! Go home!" His face blurred away from his memory just as his mental camera was about to give him an eyefull of the mysterious child._

_"I don't wanna leave you! I don't want too!!!" He shouted to him._

Rocky threw himself from his sleep as everything began to tear away, becoming blackened over he knew he had to get out of there or he would fade just as his dream has. Panting, he looks about the dark room for signs of recognition. He could be anywhere right now, with all the horrible dreams he's been having lately. These past three or so months could have been a lie altogether and he could very well be dead! Or in a comma! Wouldn't that be horrible. Now that he thought of it; when the house began to burn down all around him back then in Maria's cabin, all he could think about was going home to be with his family and friends that might have stopped by. It would be nice to die with such warm thoughts in your mind, if only the reality of it wasn't such a miserable case. He's not happy, and things aren't comfortable. If anything they're very awkward and clumpsy to the point of wanting to-...

Jumping out of his skin, Rocky just now noticed that someone was rubbing his back. Robbie held his hands back in defense. Rocky is a ninja after all and unwanted touching would no doubt bring out the fight in him, especially after what happened.

"Ssshhh... Rocky, it's just me." Says Robbie quietly.

"I know, I just... don't want you touching me." He runs a hand through his bangs that are stuck to his face from sweat. His heart is pounding so hard in his chest, how can a simple dream envoke that much fear? Especially one that isn't true! He doesn't remember being in such a dark, sufficating place, he certainly doesn't remember any boy... Anytime Rocky's ever had a nightmare, it didn't cause this much panic in him because even in the dream he knew he was dreaming, which meant he couldn't possibly get hurt but this dream... it felt so real. He could feel the strength in the boys grip keeping him from falling even as he tugged him along, he could sense the danger and frantic atmosphere gathering all around them right before he was shoved out into the city.

_That area is so familiar but... I can't recall ever being there; not at night anyway._ Rocky turned his head when something hard and cool lightly hit his shoulder. Turning his head, he takes the offered mug from his roommate, drinking whatever is in it.

_I wonder if I should ask him if he's alright?_ Thinks Robbie, taking a seat on Rocky's bed incase the male doesn't want him too close.

"I'm fine." Replies Rocky abruptly. "I just had a nightmare."

"About my aunt?" He can't help calling her that, she is after all his aunt and has been nothing but loving to him. But Robbie is beyond guilty everytime, and there have been many, Rocky has a nightmare.

Shaking his head, he looks down into the darkness of the cup that made his normally clear drink black. It actually made him think about himself and Sin. How he can be so normal, so... well he can't say untainted with all that's happened to him but, he feels like he wants to live in nothing but peace and purity while Sin wishes to darken his crystal clear mind with his taint of... well... _sin's._ Staring now, almost, Rocky frowns and thinks. _How easily water loses the battle... Will I end up the same way? Darkened... Tainted._

Robbie, watching Rocky as he gazes into his drink, asks. "Do-... do you wanna maybe talk about it... I hear that it helps."

Rocky looked at the other boy, blue eyes blinking with thought. "I... I was dreaming that I was running. I was running with someone, a boy... he seemed familiar somehow." He places the cup onto the side table. "Like his presence is embedded in me somehow, like we've actually met and he wasn't just... a dream."

Robbie took that in. "..What does he look like?"

Rocky shakes his head. "I don't know... He sounded kind of young though; I was young. Maybe he's a friend from school? I've known a lot of people and forgot about half of them when they moved away."

"Hmm... Do you have any old year books at home? Maybe you could spot him in one of the pictures."

"I told you I didn't see him, and just when I was about to- I woke up."

"But maybe by chance you noticed his clothes or shoes... If he's in a lot of pictures from school the kid may be wearing one of the items in them."

"I could ask my mom to send some over... or maybe I could check when I go home this weekend." He seemed in a better mood now. "That's really smart thinking; thank you."

"No problem." Standing, he walks over to the bed and sighs. "But, you soaked my bed, so looks like I'll be bunking with you tonight."

Blinking, Rocky smiled. "Do whatever you want. I'm gonna go for a walk."

Robbie shivered hearing those words; so close to what he said before the day he was taken. "You know what... how about I go with you? We can even get something to eat if you're hungry- my treat."

Rocky wasn't an idiot, he knew what the boy was up to. "Robbie I'll be fine, Dad has a cop on me and he won't let me out of his sites... Besides, I'm not gonna let myself get distracted in anyway, my guard will be waaay up."

"Yeah but... I feel like such a jackass for not going with you that day when you asked me." He swallowed back tears. "If I had gone with you, this whole thing could have been avoided."

Rocky shook his head and stood up. "I doubt it. Maria was very strong, she could have easily tricked you or made you sleep for a while." Walking over to Robbie he placed a hand on the boys cheeks, smiling faintly when his roommate leaned into it. "The mind is so easily tricked, after all, she got me didn't she." Nuzzling their noses together, Rocky smiled again. "Robbie," he removed his hand from the boys face and shoved him, hard, to the bed knocking the wind from him. "I want to be alone for a while. So let me." Rocky's voice was cold and so distant he almost didn't think it was Rocky he was talking to.

Blushing from how easily he had fallen for the boys kindness, he coughs out. "Sorry. I will, respect your decision, as foolish as it is."

"Thank you." Going to the closet to find something to wear, he mentions over his shoulder. "Besides, Trent is looking after me and I trust him to do that. No one is gonna lay a hand on me with a cop on my tail."

_Tch. Wasn't a cop following you the night you were taken?_ Grouches the brunet.

Balling up his fist in mock anger, Rocky says. "I heard that."

"Sorry." Watching him dress, Robbie had to turn his eyes away. "Just be careful."

"I promise you, I will. Besides, I won't even leave campus." He pulls on a jacket incase its cool out. "Everything is gonna be fine." With that said, he was out the door.

Silence grew in the room in Rocky's absence. _He'll be fine._ The boy assures his self. _I know he will._

Rocky could sense Trent's presence just a few steps behind him; he could tell when the man stopped behind a tree to watch him to when he scratched his nose due to allergies. It's actually kind of nice to be this in tune with life now that Rocky thought about it. He could still do without the mental eaves dropping but, everything could be a plus if he worked it right. He would never feel alone because he can feel the world all around him. The night swam around his exsistance like an old friend as he paced himself through the courtyard of the college. He didn't realize how much he missed this place. _Any place_ really. Touching a tree that sits to the far left of the building, he smiles at the memory of touching it many times before, he then walked over to a bench that he loved to sit at and eat his lunch. It was almost like being a kid again the way he's feeling right now. Familiar sites and smells, see why couldn't he feel this at home? Everyone's aura is just too forced and withheld all at the same time. He just can't relax there- around his own family!

"Rocky?" A female voice said somewhere behind him.

Looking over his shoulder, he turns to face her. "Hi Mia."

"I thought that was you, but, what are you doing out here?" She walked closer. "Aren't you afraid at all?"

"Why should I be?"

The girl shrugged. "I mean, it's pretty obvious..." She leaned over to whisper. "You were taken from here."

Leaning over and whispering as well, Rocky counters. "I was taken off the road when I left from here. The campus had nothing to do with my kidnapping."

"Yeah but, they kind of go hand and hand." There was an awkward silence before the girl asked. "Are you-..."

"Yes. I'm ok. I'm here aren't I?"

"Yeah."

Silence.

"What has the news been telling everyone that you're all so worried about me?"

The girl grabbed her arm giving it a light rub. "Well... They had some pictures of the woman and... she was just so freaky looking... They even said there was a chance that..." she whispered. "That you were raped."

Rocky was mortyfied hearing that. Where did the media get off sharing such private information with the world. Is this just a damned circus to them? Can't they see how much he and Noelie are hurting because of this?

"That's why all the kids at school are mad at Robbie. We heard what he did to you to make you leave school."

Wetting his mouth he asks. "...You all know about what went down between Robbie and me?"

The girl snapped to attention from the question. "Um... sort of. We know that he tried to rape you and that's why-..." She stopped talking when Rocky began to laugh. "What?"

"Mia, Robbie didn't try to rape me that night; he didn't even force himself on me." He looked down at his sneakers, the large lights that line the campus for prowlers, made them look brand new under their beams. "Actually, it was just a kiss. Sure he provoked it but he never once made me feel like he was gonna do anything more than that."

"Is that why you didn't tell him to switch rooms? Because you guys are-..." She blushed. "I mean, not to pry, but... Rocky I just don't see you that way. It's almost... I don't know, sad."

"I don't know what you mean." Though he knew very well what she was getting at.

"What I mean is... Are you guys gay?"

Shaking his head, he stuffs his hands into his pockets. "Mia I'm not gay. And Robbie... well, he's bi but I'm okay with that. And like I said when I first got back, you all should be thanking him for helping in my rescue."

"But we found out that it was _his _aunt that took you. Aren't you mad at him for that?"

"I am, but I can see past all of that to the guy I know. And Mia gay doesn't rub off on people because you spend time with them; he's my friend and has been since he moved here."

"Oh... So then, you're not... sad or... or gay?"

Rolling his eyes, the boy reached out to take the girls hand. "I'll gladly lay your fears to rest if that's what you want. Because it seems to me that everyone is doubting my character because of all of this."

Blushing because her hand is in Rocky's, she pulls it away. "No. I'm not... I was just curious." Lifting a hand as a wave, she backs away. "I'm sorry for bothering you. Good night, Rocky."

"Good night, Mia." He watched her walk away.

"Glad to finally have you here, Mr. Douglas." Maxim says to Rocky when he steps, unsure, into the mans office. "Please, have a seat."

Looking down at the long couch, he sighs then takes a seat. He hates this. Counselors have never been the best people to talk to when it comes to keeping secrets and anything he says might get out to the media or to his parents which would be much worse. Maybe he could just lie about how he feels, tell the man that everything is fine and his being here is just taking out of his day. Yeah.

"Please state your full name and then start from anywhere you like about how you're feeling." He leans forward and presses the record button on the tape player.

"Um," he feels like such an idiot. "My name is Samuel Eli, Renji Douglas. I sometimes go by Rocky."

"Okay." Says the man. _It's remarkable how much he looks like my son. He could almost be his twin._

Rocky's mental twitched hearing the mans words. _His son? What could he mean_? Shaking it off, he says. "I guess I'll start with... my favorite things."

"Excuse me?"

Taking a breath he said all in one shot. "I really liked ninja turtles when I was a kid; I watched the movies and had the toys but... secretly I was never happy with my toys, mom always got me Leonardo- he's the one with the blue bandana, when I really wanted Donatello- the one with the purple."

"Whoa, whoa" he waves a hand. "Rocky, what are you talking about?"

"You told me to talk about whatever I wanted. So I just assumed that-..."

Maxim laughed a bit, then shook his head. "You've actually been assigned a discussion by your parents. They would like for you to talk about your feelings dealing with what happened to you."

"You mean the abduction?"

"Yes."

Cracking his knuckles he exhales. "I had some troubles, my troubles are over, I'm back at school now and every thing is fine." He put on a smile to show just how fine.

"If you're fine then talking about it won't be too much of a trouble for you then, will it."

Rocky was silent.

"Hm? That to me seems like someone who is not over it."

"I am, I just... don't want you to tell my parents anything I might tell you or ask."

"Ask?"

"...I have questions." He shrugged. "I'm not used to being so... _well_ listened to. It's just kind of weird."

"I understand. How 'bout we just start fresh then. Tell me about when you first came into contact with the woman and go from there."

"Okay. But... it's a long story. Are you sure you wouldn't rather just hear the shortened version?"

"No. I believe I need a full understanding of this from your eyes, please."

Nodding, he gestures a hand to the chair. "May I?"

"What, lie down? Of course."

"Thanks." Laying down on the comfortable long chair, he closes his eyes. "It started at when I was eight; me and my mother went out for new clothes to wear at school. I spoke to a woman when we got in the store and at the time I didn't know that it was Marissa. She was very nice to me and told me that she thought I was a sweet and brave kid or something like that." He swallowed hard for what he was about to say next but instead switched it to something else. "I didn't see her after that until I was fifteen when a girl came into my life named Maria. I hung out with her because I felt bad that other kids picked on her, I didn't see what was so bad about her. But then weird things started happening, like when she spoke to me without moving her lips."

"Like throwing her voice?"

Rocky shook his head. "No. I mean like... Do you believe in mental abilities Dr. Maxim?"

The man smiled then shook his head. "Not really."

"...You should because its very real." Rocky says in all seriousness.

Raising a hand in defense the doctor shrugs. "I have no way of proof of such a thing, and I myself just don't believe in that sort of thing."

"Out of religion?"

"Yes, somewhat."

"Well listen to me because everything I tell you about her is the truth."

"All right. Continue."

Narrowing his eyes knowing that the man wasn't going to take him seriously now, he sighed. "Maria was born a mute, my brothers and I broke into her home and found a diary she planted for me to see. It was her way of... I don't know, awakening something inside of me." The more Rocky spoke the more he himself was beginning to think it sounded a little crazy and farfetched. But living it he knows its all true. "I was getting into a lot of trouble for just about everything then. Breaking and entering, nearly drowning my ex-girlfriend, and lying to my parents and the police when I wasn't!" Calming his rage a moment, he closes his eyes and breathes evenly. "So then one day she was at home and that's when I saw Marissa again, I had no clue who she was because I was very young and forgot all about that day we met."

"So then Marissa was Maria's mother? Or guardian?"

"No! Marissa _is_ Maria! She tricked me with her abilities... She had the power to manipulate peoples minds with just one thought. She had me believe that there were two people roaming around when it was her all the time. Anyhow she managed to get me alone with her and she tried to... She forced herself on me but I managed to escape by breaking her down, she was always unstable, a loner, thought no one liked her because of her gift. She told me that she and I are alike and should stick together."

"Alike?"

Rocky shook his head. Continuing on, he told the man about his days before he was taken by her. How he was receiving phone calls from a girl named Amari, who again was just Maria in diguise; how it got to the point where he was just angry so he shut the girl out. But that pissed her off and that's when she made her move. The night he left he got a headache and almost crashed his car. As he spoke Maxim listened carefully, nodding and understanding, though, he could tell there were a lot of gaps in the story from where Rocky didn't want to tell him what happened.

"All I could think about was getting out, at first, because after a while I knew that it was futile for me to try anymore." His eyes watered. "I was stupid. I couldn't hit a girl, it goes against who I am! So..." He stopped speaking, his eyes spilling the tears.

Maxim frowned; getting up from his desk he walked over to the boy and hugged him, at that point Rocky didn't hold back and he just cried.

"It was all so hard... It was all so very hard and I cried." He sniffles. "I cried a lot and doctor Maxim I don't cry. I face my problems, head on but... I was just so scared. Scared that if I fought back or disobeyed her then that poor little girl would suffer in my mistakes."

"That's a lot of responsibility for one person." He rubs his back, making hushing sounds.

Moving away when he realized he was hugging someone, he ran a hand across his eyes. "I'm sorry. I just got over whelmed."

"No. It's good to show emotion."

"Not for me, I have to be strong and solid. I have to keep a level head to protect people that are important to me."

"One person can't do that on their own."

"Can't they?" He sighs. "I have to try. For my mom, whom I hurt so much since I got back, and my brothers who have suffered because of my stupidity. Tum Tum took on my role as the stable and I can tell it broke him inside and my brother has a lot of spirit and now because of me he's so serious and sad but he hides it because he's glad that I'm back. I know that when no one is looking he cries, I know he does I can smell the tears on him."

"I'm starting to understand this now."

"You are?" Rocky had to laugh at that. "Because I've never felt more confused."

"I'm gonna go over this all and get back to you." Says Maxim regretedly.

"Okay." Standing, he brushes a hand down his shirt to compose his self.

"You said you had questions though; do you still want to ask them?"

Rocky thought it over. He knew what he had to do to get his answers. "I need to know if you know how to hypnotize a person?"

"Why?"

"...I keep seeing these images in my dreams, normally I wouldn't think anything of it but they feel so real. Just last night I had this horrible dream about a boy and me. I didn't see his face but I felt like I knew him."

"Dreams are often windows into locked away memories." He walks over to his desk, switching off the recorder. "I don't know the bases of hypnotism but I can hire someone to assist me in doing it."

Rocky nods to that. "I'm gonna go now." He walks to the door, pulling it open but he turns around to say. "I hope your son is alright." Leaving the room, he pulls the door closed after him.

Maxim looked stunned by those words. How could he have-...? Unless? Getting on the phone, he grabs the phone book. He wanted some answers as well and hypnotizing this boy might be the key to those answers.


	12. A Walk In The Park

A.N: Thanks to those who are reading! I hope I'm not freaking anyone out with the heavy plot, that isn't my intention at all. I just want to go deep into a story instead of just writing 'fishbones' with speech. Enjoy the chapter. I'm not sure how many are left but there about 15 maybe 12. Lighter.

Chapter 12.

Rocky walked from the therapist office with nothing but confusion and worry. They hardly covered anything. He asked him about how he knew Maria and that was that. Would that information help him understand why he was taken? Why she took him? Or maybe he just didn't know the story that everyone else in Las Angelos and who knows where else knew. That was a possibility. Then again, maybe the man just planned on speaking with him little bits at a time, leaving him more confused each visit so that he could make a killing off of his family with the bill. That seems possible too. But then, what was up with the mans son, he couldn't stop thinking about him, the entire time Rocky was talking the mans thoughts seemed to drift back and forth to his son.

_I think the hug did him more good than it did me._ Thinks the ninja, stuffing his hands into his pockets, dropping his gaze as he walks up the street to where ever his legs planned to take him; he took a taxi over incase he wasn't able to drive himself home after the session. Therapy can really break people down and he had to admit just being there and having someone want to listen to all the things that swam around in his head was both frightening and delightful. He wanted to tell the man how he felt like he were ready to sufficate everytime he thought his family might be in some kind of trouble, how he never wanted to take so much responsibility but no one else seemed to wanna step up. He also wanted to discuss Sin, but he didn't think that would be appropriate, an alter ego is the kind of thing you tell parents about and they just can't find out, not until the whack job is good and gone.

Speaking of which, he hasn't seen hide nor hair of the goofy male, making him wonder if maybe he has been relieved of him for the time being because he's out of the house. Or maybe the bastard is biding his time until he can make a grand escape in which he, Rocky, will never return. His vibrating phone caught his attention. Pulling it from his pocket, he flips it open.

Cocking a brow, he reads. _Four missed calls. When? I never heard my phone ring._ Highlighting the messages option, he holds the phone to his ear.

Message 1: _**Who do you think you are?**_

Rocky's eyes nearly fell from his head hearing the voice on the other end of the phone. It was like someone took a hellium pump and filled his head with air and they were torturing him with when they planned to release the pressure.

Message 1: _**You can't just come along and assume to be the dominant one, when clearly its me that owns this body. If you so much as fantasize about telling that man about me, I'll destroy you.**_

Rocky looked horrified! How did Sin... When did he? Is he losing his grip on reality now? No, he feels perfectly normal, but isn't that the first sign of something bad? You feel like everything is fine during a thunder storm and next thing you know the wind grabs the clouds and throws them into a loud BOOM!

Message 2: _**Look, I was mad before. Don't take what I said seriously brother... We're still friends right? So you aren't gonna tell Maxim about me? Please?**_

_Could he have called my cell just to leave messages on it? Why would he do that? Unless... unless he feels that Maxim can actually stop him from existing. Than it must be true! Once I find out the secret that Sin is hiding from me I can get rid of him once and for all and get my life back!_ He was just about to stuff his phone back into his pocket until he realized there were still two messages on it.

Message 3: _**How long are you planning to ignore me?**_ It's a girls voice. _**Rocky I really need to speak with you. Please call me, I left my number several times but I'll say it again incase you didn't get it, its...**_

Rocky felt up the side of his pants for something he could write on, but even if he found something to write on, he wouldn't have a pen. A phone booth caught his eye and he knew that he could use a tear of paper from the back of the book and those booths always have pens with them. Crossing the street, he listens to the message over, writing the number down, labeling it 'anonomous' since the caller i.d showed 'unknown' over it. Checking the final message it was from Robbie; it must have been the one he just got. He would have to call him later, though, he didn't want anything he's just being over protective.

Dialing the phone number, he waits out the rings but there was no answer. The caller must be out then.

_How did she get my cell number, and who is she?_ Wonders the ninja. Checking his watch, he decides not to go home and instead heads for the park to do some thinking.

The nippy California air blew at him as he walked into a different part of the city. It's very pleasant for March. Head down, hands in his pockets, he starts up the street to- _anywhere _just as long as he could be alone. During the course of being back from Hell home, Rocky managed to control his abilities somewhat and was able to stonch the voices of padestrians that constantly ran through his head whenever he was in a crowded place. Now he only picks up on a few peoples words, but that's only when they're projecting too loudly.

He stopped by the park walking down the stone stairs finding a bench to plant his self at so he could think. The park has always been a wonderful place to go when you just need to relax and be alone, even though there are always people here, you still feel like you can have your own space if you need it.

_Sin sounded so scared in those messages. Could I have the upper hand in this round? Can I win and get my life back to normal?_ He closed his eyes tightly._ but what if what Sin is hiding is really bad? What if it's just like when Maria raped me?! How much more happened to me that I can't remember any of it?_ His eyes snap open at the sound of dribbling.

Just a few feet in front of him is a small child playing with a ball. Her red curls bounce up and down as she chases the sphere when it rolls away from her. That made Rocky smile. It reminded him of an Irish girl he knew named Sherry. He always liked talking to her because her accent is so thick that trying to figure out just what it was she said to you would amuse him for hours. This girl looked American for sure, and about six years old. That made him frown.

_Sin? What else could he be hiding? _Rocky remembered Sin saying something to himself about never telling him the truth. The ninja was glad that his alter didn't know that sometimes he could hear him even as he slept within the confinds of his mind, it would make the male lash out at him for sure, but Rocky had to wonder if he could actually do anything.

"Ahahahaha!!!" The young girl laughed when her balled bounced off the wall before coming back and popping her in the face. She missed it, though, when trying to catch it and hunched over she followed after it.

_So good_.

Rocky turned his head in the direction the thought had come from.

_Just a little more..._

Getting up from his seat, the ninja walked over toward the location the thoughts were coming from. He couldn't quiet place it, exactly, so he had to look around for a moment. But as he got closer to a pile of bushes that grew in between the park area, he saw thick bare legs sticking up a bit from the branches, below them a bundle of what could only be trouser and a sullied pair of boxer shorts. Quietly, he moved closer. Deep heavy breathing filled his ears upon doing this and what he saw made his blood run cold. There, on the grass lay a man that could be maybe 50 years old; he has a hand gripped firmly around his penis while the other is up his shirt, eyes just barely open as he stared under the leafless part of the bush at the young girl. Before Rocky even knew that he took another step forward the man howled in pain from where the ninja's sneaker came into contact with his crotch. Dropping down on the grass, he grabbed the elderly man by his neck pulling him from his hiding place.

"What do you think you're doing buddy?! Huh?!" He barked while squeezing the life from the gray haired mans body. "Do you think it's alright if nobody catches you!? Do you think that you wouldn't be hurting that girl if she knew!!"

"Stop! Stop!" He cried. "Somebody help me!"

"Nobody's gonna save you!" Rocky almost growled. "The only way you'll get your rightful saving is when you go to Hell!!!!"

The screams from the old man brought a father running and he began to yell as well, pulling the ninja from the old man. "What do you think you're doing?!" He shouted.

"That man is a pervert!!" Rocky whailed, struggling to get free. "He's watching that little girl!! Let go of me!!"

Before he knew it, a cop came over, the news crew. This had disaster written all over it.

Later that night. Rocky had about four boxes set before him, each of them containing some type of book that the family owns. He snuck out of bed after everyone went to sleep so that he could search. The incident at the park turned out to be the highlight of the media as it was played on every single channel; the whacked out victim of a child molester is on the prowl for justice. Jessica was glad that Rocky was okay, but she was also upset about the fact that he didn't just call the police, he should never harm an elderly person no matter what he may be doing. They just don't understand. That little girl could have been snatched for all the attention her mother was paying her.

Tearing the tape away from the box top, he opens it quickly, looking through the contents inside. Old cook books, address book containting people that might have moved by now. He finally came across what he was looking for. A year book from '92.

_I would have been six in this year._ Rocky wasn't sure what age he might have been in the dream, he just knows that he was younger than he is now and younger than a teenager. Carefully, he flips through the book. There are plenty of young teens that have blond hair, so which one could be the boy from his dream? _Not him... not him... that's me... Maybe it isn't anyone from my class; chances of that boy being my age and tall are very good but there's also a chance that he could be from a different grade period altogether._ Upping his search to fourth grade, he skims down each persons face, making sure not to miss even the slightest thing that could look like the boy. But to no avail. "Dammit. If I just had a better shot of him." He grouched.

"Rocky?" Tum tums voice called from down below. Rocky can hear his little brother ascending the long step ladder to climb into the, once frightening to him, attic. "What are you doing up here?"

Rocky only looked over his shoulder, then grabbed another year book. "I'm looking for someone."

Walking closer he spots the hard cover book in his brothers hand. "Who? Maybe I can help?"

Rocky shook his head. "I doubt it. It's someone... someone I'm not sure really exists."

"Huh?"

"Like maybe I just dreamed of him up."

"I don't understand."

"I had a dream the other night, and I was being dragged along by some kid pulling me out of a house. He was maybe 14 or 12, I'm not sure, but he was older than me." He skips to the next grade level. "I didn't see his face too clearly, but Robbie thought that I might be able to spot him in one of my old year books, that maybe I've met him before because when I woke up from my dream I could have sworn he would have been right there in the room with me."

Tum tum thought that over. His brother was dreaming about running, he felt like he met the person before. "...Maybe it was you."

"Me? Why would I be running with myself."

"No, I mean maybe you were re-living what happened at Marissa's." He put a hand on his brothers shoulder. "Maybe your mind was messing with you a little bit. And instead of you running with Noelie, it was sort of Noelie running with you."

"But Tum, why would I turn her into a boy? It doesn't make any sense."

"So you think that something like that might have really happened?" He cocked his head to see his brothers face. "You think that maybe you were being rushed someplace by someone?"

Rocky shook his head in contemplation. "It's not that simple. He told me that he was getting me_ out _of that place. Then he threw me into the streets."

"But when would something like that have happened? You've always been at home as far as I know."

"Yeah but Tum tum, in my dream I was maybe six or seven that would have made you... 3; way to young to remember anything."

"Maybe Colt knows, or Mom or Dad." He shrugs. "I saw you sleep walk maybe once, but you never made it any further than getting dressed and that was when you were ten."

Rocky stopped thumbing through the book. His eyes watered, though, they didn't spill out. "All these thoughts and numbers, I can't concentrate right. It's giving me a headache."

"You should take a rest, you're still recovering from what happened-..."

"Bull shit!" He snapped. "There's nothing to _recover _from! I wasn't one of those boys at the funeral! I'm alive! And fine, and well! So just leave me the hell alone!" Tossing the book to the floor, he stands up then leaves. How can he stay at home over the weekend when he can't do anything without someone getting into his business? _I need a walk_. descending the stairs, he leaves Tum Tum alone in the attic to feel bad for causing his brother to scream at him.


	13. Let Me Introduce Myself

A.N: I'm sorry for both the late and the crappy chapter. I've got severe writers block and just haven't been typing like myself lately so I'm gonna have to take a break and get back to this when my brain isn't broken. I hope you won't abandon me hahaha. I'll try my best, get two notebooks to think up ideas in. I know the end and middle of the story just fine but as for the rest of it not so much. So until then, I'm gonna break. Enjoy the chapter. Lighter.

...

Chapter 13.

In the darkness of his shared bedroom, Tum tum takes the sock from his foot then rolls it into a well sized ball before he lobs it over at his second brother nailing him right in the face. Colt groaned in his slumber before he is hit a second time- that woke him up.

"Damn it Tum, the house better be on fire for you to be tossing dirty laundry at me." He muttered then silence as though he went back to sleep again. Said laundry hurling brother was about to speak when Colt cut him off. "What?"

"I think something's wrong with Rocky."

"Duh!" Was all that comment earned the young boy.

"No seriously," He leans over to the edge of his bed so his brother can hear him a little better. "I heard noises coming from the attic and Rocky was up there... He was looking through old year books for someone, a boy he said he saw in a dream."

"Tum tum, Rocky is going through something right now and... and even though he's not himself... we have to let him feel it, otherwise he'll bottle it up and then we'll really have problems." Colt sits up because he can sense tonights rest is over.

"Yeah but... there are other things about him that just don't seem right." Tum sits up as well. "Colt, Rocky can... He can... I mean, lately when I talk to him he seems like he's not his self. Like he's just someone posing as Rocky. And you saw him last week, he ate _bacon_, Colt. Bacon! That's meat, and Rocky stopped eating meat years ago."

"So maybe he changed his mind again."

"No because at dinner we had chicken and he didn't touch a single piece."

Colt scratched his head. What exactly is Tum tum getting at. "Tum tum go to sleep, Rocky is in therapy now. Dr. Maxim will fix whatever is wrong with him."

"Colt do you think it's possible that Rocky _isn't_ Rocky. Like maybe Maria took him someplace else, and this Rocky we have is just a look alike? It's possible! Look at how many celebrity look alikes there are."

"Tum those people that look like celebrities are just a bunch of wannabe's that mold their faces to look like that persons. It's never just a coincidence when you outright brag about it. Just look at all those Britney Spears posers."

Tum silently thought that over. There are a lot of people that look like Paris Hilton. Maybe Colt's right, and Rocky's just going through something that neither of them can understand. "But maybe we can help him."

"Where is he now?"

"He left. I think he's just out front getting some fresh air." Picking at his fingernails, Tum tum wished his mother hadn't taken his secret stash of Skittles from under his pillow and locked it in a drawer in the master bedroom. He switched from Jelly Beans to Skittles a year back. "Maybe we could ask him to talk to us if he's uncomfortable talking to Dr. Maxim. That guy just doesn't seem like he's all in there. I think he doesn't have a real degree because I didn't feel like I was in therapy, it felt more like an interview."

"We're not the ones who need the therapy, he just wanted to get to know Rocky through our eyes, that's all. Maybe the guy works differently from other therapists."

Laying back down on his back, Tum tum stares at the white ceiling. The boys had repainted the room and now the walls are light blue with shuriken and kunai painted here and there, and a few trees with the leaves blowing from it. It means that ninjas strike when in hiding but by having no ninjas on the wall you never know where the attack came from. Teens, go figure.

"I'm just tired of worrying about him. He really seemed to wanna open up to me at the park... but... I don't know, he didn't make much sense to me then either."

"He'll come around. We just have to have faith in that." Laying back down he pulls the covers over his head. "Now go to sleep."

"Okay." He hates being younger, he's no longer a kid but damn if doesn't get treated like one.

Sin walked quietly along the street after hanging up his phone. He left a nice little message for Rocky on the voicemail this time, and he hoped that Rocky got the message loud and clear. This doctor was actually starting to pose as a threat to him now that he's agreed to find a hypnotist; and Sin isn't gonna let anything happen to his chances of being freed. For all he knows his charge might want Maxim to vanish him completely and maybe a hypnotist could do it, maybe not. He didn't wanna think about it- most of the time Sin doesn't wanna think about anything! Just move through the night as it comes. But there were times, times like when Robbie showers and Rocky spares a glance that way that make him wanna come out in the daylight and lay ground work for a little rub-a-dub-dub moment. Robbie is a sappy retard in Sin's green eyes, but he could probably give a good hours worth of amusement if need be.

Walking into the park, he heads along to the spot where good guy Rocky had stopped some perve from eying that little girl who was playing with her ball. Sin actually clapped about that because he would have done more than kicked the old guy in the nuts. He would have ripped his brains apart bit by bit so that it was nothing more than strands of thread loose from its bobble. Laying down on the grass he turned his head looking at the darkness before him rimmed by the dimly colored moonlit leaves. He remembers this laying spot so well because he used it his self when he was younger. He would watch this cute boy playing trucks with his friend

_Haha_. Sin couldn't help but laugh. He remembers sending secret messages to the boy and he would laugh whenever the kid would look around wondering who was talking in his ear. He actually got him to look at him one year, as he hid there behind the bush. The young boy looked down and saw him laying there, he smiled at first but then he flipped him off- something he no doubt learned from his older brother, Sin just didn't think eight year olds knew what that meant. He knew becasue unlike other kids he was really in touch with the world of adults and almost praised himself for the fact. A snapping twig caught his attention. Closing his eyes he waits to feel the person's energy so he could locate where they are hiding. It's a little ways away from him by the big tree that all the kids climb because it's got low enough branches to give them that boost in that they need.

"You may as well come out. I'm not the kind of person to assume it was just some cute little night animal." He says into the silent airspace.

It was silent for a moment, but then out from behind a tree came Robbie. Sin cocked his head at the boy wondering what he was doing near his house instead of at the dorms. Is he _that_ hungry he couldn't wait until tomorrow to see Rocky that he would choose to stalk the house. This boy had better watch it before he starts getting as sick as his aunt.

"Sorry." Robbie says while walking over and taking a seat beside him.

"For what? Spying?" He slips his arms behind his head. "You can save it because I don't care."

That was odd to him. Rocky doesn't usually talk so... strangely. He remembered one time when he talked like this, it was right before they went to the club. He didn't seem like his self then and after that he... Shifting uncomfortably, he lays down mimicing the other boys pose.

"Are you feeling ok?"

"Sure are." He continues to look at the sky.

"Ha." He scoffs then adds. "Okay."

"What? You don't believe me?" Sin cocked a curious brow.

"It's not that, I just... Don't feel like I'm talking to _you_ right now. Like you're someone else."

Rolling onto his side, supporting his weight on his elbow he asks. "Really? And who do you think I am?"

Robbie blushed having Rocky leaning that close to him, he smells nice and looks hypnotic in the moonlight. Even if the boy doesn't like men, he sure gives Robbie enough to think about at the end of the day; almost like he does it on purpose.

"You really like looking at me, don't you." It was so aggressively said, Robbie almost expected a smack to come after it. But Rocky sat up instead, then began to undo the buttons on his shirt. Tensing, Robbie waited for the breath taking sight he'd longed to see beneath him someday.

"Don't have an asthma attack, I'm wearing an under shirt." He smiled as he slipped the over shirt off. "I was getting hot."

"I... I wasn't."

"Yeah right." His voice had a certain tone to it that made Robbie wanna hide himself, like he were suddenly naked and so didn't wanna be. "You want Ro-.." he cleared his throat before correcting his self. "You want _me _so bad you can hardly walk straight."

Sitting up a bit with support from his forearm, Robbie looks at Rocky then asks. "You're not Rocky, are you?"

"Ding! Ding! Ding! Here's the nights winner, Robbie Ballerini!" He shouts into the sky; clapping loudly. "Tell me, would Rocky do this?" He climbs onto the lap of his charge's friend. "Would he lay you down," he presses his hand to the males chest rubbing it in little circles against the fabric. "like this?" Nuzzling his cheek to Robbie's cheek then his lips to Robbie's lips, smirking at the panicked gasp that came from the teen. "Would he ever brush his tongue against those hideously attractive lips of yours, and beg for a kiss?" And pressing his own close enough for soft flesh to brush and sort of stick to the other male's he whispered. "Please." He closed his eyes when Robbie's body shivered beneath him; he was supposed to turn the Canadian on not himself. Drawing back, he then asked. "And would he ever kiss you" His voice is just a soft breath from his mouth. "...like this." Just as their lips touched, Robbie shoved Sin away.

"Stop it, this is just... too weird." He sounds a bit out of breath because he's so flustered. "You're telling me that you're not Rocky?"

"Call me Sin."

"Sin?" While wondering what kind of name that is, he had a bunch of other questions like; when the hell did you come along? Does Rocky know about you? Are you really coming on to me? Is this a good or bad dream? _Wait, this doesn't make any sense!_

Sin rubbed his nose like he were warding off a sneeze then he got up from Robbie's lap, standing close by. "You're an idiot, but you have your uses."

"What?" Completely dumbfounded. He gets up as well; glad he isn't sporting a physical hard-on as he's sporting a mental one.

Grabbing the boy by the shoulders, he looks him in the eye before saying. "Robbie, you're the first person I've told about me, that makes you pretty damn special in my book. So how about you do me a favor and I'll do one for you."

"...Like?"

"Like you keep Rocky from seeing that therapist tomorrow and I'll give you something," He reaches down grabbing the boy by his crotch. "_Nice_ in exchange."

Robbie felt a fierce blush cover his face. Is this guy serious? Or is Rocky playing a sick joke on him because he has a crush. But with the way his breath is hitching from this Sin guys palm massaging him through his jeans, he can't help but wanna do whatever the male asks of him.

Smiling when he sees that glimmer in Robbie's hungry eyes sparkle, as well feeling the loose jeans tightening around the poor bastard. Kissing Robbie's neck tenderly, he adds as the icing on the cake. "I'll let you call me Rocky."

Swallowing hard, he pushed Rocky- or Sin, whoever he is! away. "This is all too freaky, I just... I think you're tired and you need to get home. Come on, I'll walk with you."

"Dumbass!" He throws his hands into the air, then drops them down at his sides before storming off with Robbie in tow. Looks like he's just gonna have to do this his self- _as usual_.

Sin walked into the Douglas home, glancing over his shoulder at Robbie who is lurking around behind him as if he didn't trust that he would go right up to bed. Turning to face him he spreads his arms in question.

"What? I made it here in one piece, Hero. Nobody is gonna harm your precious not-so-secret crush. Happy? Now take off." Closing the door, he swiftly pulled it open again. Pulling his eye lid down with his middle finger, he winked the other eye closed then stuck out his tonge. "Meeeehhh!" Then like a spoiled child he closed the door. "Humph, pain in my ass. Maybe I should just go to therapy in Rock's place, back the guy off myself."

"Rocky?" Tum tum says from the top of the stares.

_Shit_. Turning on a smile and innocent face, he looks at his little brother. "Hey Tum... I did a lot of thinking and I'm sorry for yelling at you."

"No, forget about it."

Nodding, he walks upstairs getting a stare down the entire time. "I'm bushed." Tum tum continued to stare. "Gonna... go to bed now..." Now Sin stared. _What's this brat looking at? _Cocking his head, he says one last thing before ducking into his bedroom. "Good night."

"Yeah... good night." He says to the closed door. Turning back to his room, he walks inside giving Rocky's door a quick glance before disappearing inside. There's no way that guy is his brother- it just can't be. He may sound like Rocky but little things about him make it impossible to believe. Mostly the way he walks, it's just too... _confident_. Rocky walks with confidence but its a different kind than this guy. He'll have to investigate.


	14. A Good Friend

A.n: I know it seems a bit rushed but all the rushing has to do with the plot as well. Good to have another chapter done I know that. Enjoy.

Chapter 14.

"And so that is why wherever you go you should always bring a buddy or three... Oh," he says after a second thought. "Thank you." He looked over the faces of his family. Each of them staring back at him unsure of what to do next. Rocky just finished reading them his speech that he's prepared to read the kids at the middle school and it was completely lacking in depth. He sounded more unsure and frightened than aware of what should be done when strangers are around.

"Well, honey" Jessica began.

Rocky knew it was gonna be bad if she started a sentence with, 'well honey' or 'I see what you're getting at'. Folding up his piece of paper, he shoves it back into his jeans pocket then takes a seat on the arm chair. "I don't know what to say to them; they're all gonna be looking at me and I'm gonna freeze up."

"No, baby you just have to relax and be yourself."

_Yeah, I don't know if you've noticed but I'm not even sure of who I am anymore._ He thinks while picking at his stubs for fingernails._ Rocky? Sin? Who am I, Rin?_ He smiled to himself. _At least I have my sense of humor back. It's been a month and a week since that horrible time and I still can't shake it off because of these horrible dreams and this feeling that someone is watching me. Not to mention the strange phone calls I've been receiving from some girl. Could she just be another one of those sex stared teens who wants to know me because of the abduction or is it someone... Someone I know?_

"Rocky?" Tum tum waves a hand in front of his brothers vacant face.

"Hm?"

"Where'd you go? Are you having flashbacks again?"

_And that's another thing, ever since Sunday Tum's been staring at me constantly. Does he know something that I don't? Robbie's been looking at me funny the last couple of days too, the only person who seems to be minding their own business is Colt._ With a shrug the green ninja, shakes his head to clear it. "I was just thinking about how much better I've been feeling lately." Rocky nearly rolled his eyes at how 'believable' he sounded just then.

"Maybe you should just cancel it." Says Colt, heading into the kitchen to grab his math book that he left on the table after Rocky called him from his breakfast.

"Good plan; I can just let down all those little kids who have decided to look up at me as a hero." He says sarcastically. "After all, I don't owe _them_ anything, what have they done for me?" Running a hand through his hair, which has started to itch like crazy whenever he doesn't brush it, Rocky sighs heavily. "Maybe I should just wing it."

"Whatever you decide you'd better do it quick." Jessica kissed her sons on the forehead. "You boys have to go or you'll be late."

"Is the bus gone?" Asked the youngest of the Douglas boys. "I hate riding with Colt, all he plays is rock music."

"Tum tum, only fags listen to pop music." He retorts.

Rocky had a hard wince at how serious his brother said that forbidden word; it sounded almost like he knew something. Deny it as he might, Rocky couldn't help but notice just how much he's been looking at the same gender since he's gotten back and it scares the crap out of him. What if... What if Sin is right? What if he is... one of them? Will his family treat him differently? Will they hate him because of their beliefs? Grandpa said they would love him no matter what, but that was dealing with his abilities not his sexual preferences. Bad enough he has Dr. Maxim asking him this question and that about his life; if he found out about him, would the man rat him out to his parents in a secret meeting? Or will he trick them into the same room and just out right say it to watch the feathers fly. Rocky doesn't know who to trust anymore.

"Rocky? Are you alright?" He mother asked setting a hand on his shoulder. "If you're not feeling well, you can always cancel."

"That's what I said." Mentions Colt right before the front door closed.

Rocky tossed a glare his brothers way then looked at his mother shaking his head. "No. I'm sure I wanna do this, besides if I can help prevent something bad from happening to one of them then great, right?"

Jessica looked sullenly at her son. "Just, take it easy."

"I will." Giving her a kiss on the cheek, he heads to the door. "Bye mom. I'll be back..." He had to think about it. "A little after lunch and then I'm gonna head back to school." With a wave he closed the door.

Rocky felt sick. How is he supposed to talk about something like this to kids!? What should he say? Should he joke about it to ease the tension that's gonna be so thick he'll choke on it_. I've gotta stop questioning everything I do_. Thinks the ninja. He's looking back and forth up and down the hall as he waits outside of the auditorium preparing his self to speak to the middle school kids that would soon shrink into elemetary school kids if all went well here. He just knows it.

"Samuel?" Principal Zimmerman opened the door to the auditorium. "We're ready for you."

_Show time_. Getting up from his seat he fixed his suit jacket and brushed a hand down his dress pants then stepped into the large room onto a big stage where he can remember once doing a dance with Jo and Paula and a kid named Porter for the school talent show; now it seems like the scariest place on earth. The wooden podium sits in the center of the stage awaiting his presence so that he can relay a message to all the young children in the room. Only thing is... he still doesn't know what to say.

_He's cutier in person_. Thinks a young girl.

_Who is this guy? _Thinks a boy. _How much longer are they gonna make us sit in here. Ugh! I actually wanna go to class_.

_I wonder how come he's here? _Thinks another young boy with a rather high voice for his guessed age.

Blowing away their inner thoughts with the sweep technique Rocky thought up to stop the voices, he let out a calming breath then let himself go with the flow. "H- how many of you know the definition of a stranger?" He asks.

The kids look shocked that he said anything, unsure of whether or not that was a grutorical question or if he actually wanted an answer. So they said nothing. Rocky decided to keep his nerve and go on even though none of them were listening.

"Nearly all of you thought the answer is 'someone you don't know' but you're wrong. Everyone, whether it be a man or woman on the street or kids in the new grade level you're going to, teachers- everyone in the world is a stranger until you get to know them." The kids seemed to be paying a bit of attention now. "The true meaning of the word stranger is 'someone showing too much interest in you'. This person, you've never seen before, could just start popping up everywhere you are; calling it a coincidence when in fact they've been watching your every move." He looked out at all the darkened faces before him, the bright lights from the stage below are shining in his eyes burning the blue brightly. "A stranger is a hunter... someone who wants to be around you to the point of it being a no matter what situation- look at me." He held a hand to his chest. "I thought, like most of you, the world was a safe place as long as I was careful but I was wrong."

A girl sat up straight from her leaned position in her seat. She seemed to be listening very hard now.

"And because I let my guard down that one time I was abducted... And held as a prisoner in some sick womans home because her fantasies weren't enough for her anymore." Wetting his mouth, he sighed. "I'm not trying to scare any of you, believe me... I just want you to listen to me so that you can keep yourself safe and not make the same mistake that I did... Most people, like Alfonse and the others they weren't able to get the same break I did, they weren't able to get out... the percent of people who make it out of situations like that are only 3 percent and I'm not joking... So please... anywhere you go, travel in sets of four or five don't stray from the group even for a second. Those of you who are young should always stay in eyesight of your parents or guardians. Because if you don't, you'll end up a part of that 97 percent of people who are abducted and never seen again." He glanced at principal Zimmerman. "I'm not saying you can't enjoy life, I'm just saying be responsible for yourself... Are there any questions, anything anyone want to ask?"

At first the kids just looked at each other, then slowly one by one hands began to go up all around the room. Rocky was unsure of whether or not he should be delighted that they listened to him or worried about the questions their young minds would have for him. Are they gonna want gory details of what happened to him, because truthfully for the most part even he is unsure of what happened.

"Um, you the boy in the front with the yellow tank."

"So, even if someone comes up to me and asks me for the time I shouldn't tell them because they could just wanna talk to me?"

"You can tell them the time and move on but if they persist on asking you things than find an adult and avoid that person from then on." He answered as responsibly as he could think of on the fly. "How 'bout the girl with the purple knit hat."

"Did you really save that little girl?"

Assuming she meant Noelie, he nods. "Yeah, I guess we kind of saved each other because," he shrugs. "She motivated me not to give up because she was too young to be in a place like that, I had to get her out of there even if I didn't make it."

Some of the girls began to giggle at how knightly that sounded or prince-like, Rocky wasn't sure but he asked the next kid to speak but they instead chickened out. Another boy just stood up and said as loud as he could.

"My dad said you're a faggot because you let some woman keep you captive, is that true?" He sat down and laughed with a bunch of his buddies who dared him to say it.

Rocky thought about telling that kid to tell his father to shove it, but instead he mentally counted to ten then said aloud. "No. I'm not. I just couldn't bring myself to harm a girl, even if she was bad."

"But that's stupid." Said the smart ass. "If she was all that bad you should have just hit her!"

Feeling his fuse light up, he bit his tongue. "Yeah, I guess you're right. But when you're as weak as a wet paper and strapped to a bed its kind of hard to beat someone brains in." He slapped himself for saying that. _Crap._

The middle school kids were in an uproar with chatter now. Rocky damn near told them all to shut up but he knew that wouldn't help anything. Why did he open his mouth. Principal Zimmerman stood up and took over the microphone. "That will be all Samuel and thank you." Turning her attention to the rowdy bunch she says in a serious tone. "Shut up you brats, you'll treat Mr. Douglas with the respect he deserves, it could have easily been one of you this boy saved so show him some appreciation."

The large crowd quieted then they began to clap for him. Principal Zimmerman smiled, the crinkles on her face now showing off her actual age to the world. "You're a hero Mr. Douglas you truly are. That will be all. Thank you."

"Thank you." He walked away from the stage unaware of the child that followed him out from one of the side doors.

"Excuse me, Mr. Douglas?" He tugged on Rocky's sleeve.

"Hmm?" He stopped in his tracks, that were heading straight for the exit out of this place, turning to see a young boy of 14 staring up at him. It was the kid who chickened out on asking a question. "Can I help you?"

"That man... from the park... He used to always talk to me..." He bit his lip, shyly looking at the floor. "Do you think he would have..." The kid blushed but his eyes swelled with tears.

Rocky shook his head, kneeling down. "He was too elderly to drag you off on his own so I don't think you were in danger of being snatched but you might have been willingly abducted if you went with him voluntarily. But he's gone now," he brushed a hand through the kids hair offering him a smile. "You don't have to worry about him."

The kid nodded with a smile. "My name is Damion by the way."

"Hmhm. You can call me Sam, Damion."

"You know, you really are a hero. I wanna be like you when I get older- haha, a hero to the people."

"Get yourself into a good karate class and you're already halfway there." Patting the kid on the shoulder, he stands up straight. "I have to go now. See you."

"Bye." He returned to the auditorium.

Rocky felt good after leaving the school, and it didn't take as long as he thought it would. He got his point across, gave out good tips, and even though he blew up on that little spore in the middle row it wasn't as bad as it could have been. Pushing through the front doors he slowed to a stop upon seeing a shortish, hispanic guy standing by his car. Walking closer, cautious, ready to defend if need be the male smiled when he saw him approach.

"Rocky?" He asks.

"Yeah."

"I'm Andre, your mother told me you'd be here." He held out his hand. "Can I talk to you?"

Rocky entered the small sushi cafe with the strange male, keeping a side eye on him all the time they drove and all the while they walked into the restaurant. Who is he? _His voice sounds familiar somehow. But I know I've never seen him before_. Taking a seat at the table, this Andre picked up the menu and looked it over before saying. "Don't worry, its my treat."

"Let's cut the bull Andre, who are you? And what do you want?"

"Harsh. I guess Sin lied about talking to you."

Shaking his head in mild confusion, he questions. "Sin?" With a quick nod, he figures it out but not entirely all of it. He just knows now that this person is someone Sin knows, but then why didn't he call him Sin? "How do you... know Sin?"

"He visits my nightclub like nearly every night." Seeing the waiter he says. "We'll have the platter." Looking back at Rocky, he shrugs. "I asked him about talking to you last month and he said I could and he would ask you if it was alright. Guess he never got around to it."

"Oh..." Was all he could offer. "So... what do you wanna talk about?"

"I just wanted to ask you how you're doing."

He cocks a brow in question. "How I'm doing?"

Blushing, Andre shrugs again. He isn't the shy type but something about Rocky is really making him wanna hide. "I know, it's stupid right but I just never knew anyone who could go through something so major and still be able to find a way to function. I don't know if I could do that."

"Trust me, I'm still not back to normal, not completely anyway and as far as being a hero goes everyone is nuts. I did what I thought was right at the time but if I had to do it all over again, I never would have let myself be held as long as I was. I was terryfied had more than enough ways to stop her but I didn't... I gave up so many times and then one day I snapped," he begins to pick at his fingernails. "If that fire hadn't started, I'd still be there."

Andre looked sad about bringing up that kind of pain. Reaching across the table he brushed his fingers through Rocky's bangs. "All the pictures on tv and the posters your hair is short. You must have been there for ages."

"No, it wasn't long. I'm actually shocked about the growth myself."

"You know what they say, people who grow their hair really fast are very sexual people."

Laughing, Rocky shook his head. "I heard a good touch of fear can help too."

"Forgive me for staring but its just amazing how much alike you and your brother are."

"Huh?"

"Sin. The only differences are in the eyes and personality; I'd know Sin from even across the block with the way he is."

"You must be really close."

He shrugs popping a nice sized piece of fish into his mouth. "You could say that, my job is always a blast when he comes in and I'm sure the guys love him."

"You mean... the people he's... seeing?" He swallows back a bit of vomit.

Andre nods. "You know the two of you in a room together must get some kind of stares." He holds out a hand. "Because you're so good looking."

"So you're one of my brothers" using the word that Sin used on him. "suiters too?"

"Me? No, I'm married with a kid. And as straight as a ruler."

"So then why work at a gay bar?"

"Because I love them, they're nice to everyone because they know what its like to be hated on and... I don't know, they have a better sense of fun than the guys I hang out with normally."

Eating a bite of fish, Rocky listens to Andre tell a bunch of funny stories about the guys that frequent his club even some about Sin were funny. But Rocky hated it when Andre told him that Sin has his own room in the place. Does that mean he's just having random sex with people and if so is he at least using a condom- God the thought sickens him. Does Sin really believe that he's a real person? He's not! Maybe he should go to the hospital and get checked out... or maybe...

"Where did you say you worked?" Asks the green ninja ready to do some investigating.

"Heat Wave. Why, you thinking about stopping by?"

"Yeah, I think I am."


	15. In diguise

Chapter 15

Rocky closed his eyes, and pretends to be asleep. The reason for this is that he doesn't want Robbie to see him when he sneaks out to go that club Heat Wave or whatever. Rocky searched the small dorm room for where Sin might keep his clubbing clothes, since he doubted the male would go out to a place like that dressed in his attire; the search happened when his roommate was in class. He searched through boxes and such but found nothing. It left the troubled male to wonder if his alter was leaving the clothes someplace else? He honestly thought that all hope was lost, and Rocky fell back on his bed in defeat.

"Where could he have hidden them." He wondered out loud.

Suddenly, as if the part of his mind ruled by Sin allowed him to peek into the alter's brainwave he looks at the dresser. Rocky already searched the dresser, though, and he'd found nothing, but there has to be something there. He's long since accepted that his instincts could go beyond a normal persons', so this must be it.

Sitting up, he snatches the drawer completely free from the dresser and sure enough, he'd found it! Not _in_ the drawer but _beneath_ it. When he'd set the drawer down on the bed a crinkling sound is what caught his attention giving away the secret hidden beneath it. Turning it over, Rocky smiled at how clever the other male could be. Pulling free the package taped underneath the drawer, he unsheaths some very posh yet tasteful club wear.

Rocky re-folded the clothes then stuffed them under the mattress, he then replaced the drawer where it had been and lay back down. When Trent knocked on the door, his way of checking on him while still allowing him privacy, Rocky called out, "Here." So he knew that he was fine.

Its been a while now since that incident and Rocky himself is assured that Maria will never rise again, so Trent can call it quits with watching him. Although, with Sin roaming free it is kind of reassuring that someone might be watching him when he goes out. That thought was frightening, has Trent been following Sin? And if so, what does he plan on doing about it? Will he tell his parents? Why hasn't he told them? Maybe he doesn't know about his night activities.

Rocky could guess that Sin probably knew where the man was hiding, and he messed with his mind so that he saw no one leaving the room at all. This trick came as child's play to Maria, so for someone like Sin its stuff that a baby should be doing.

But after a long day the two roommates ordered out and ate dinner watching an 'I Love Lucy' marathon. Robbie showed off the worst Ricky impersonations Rocky's ever heard so he had to tell him that his younger brother could blow him out of the water easily.

The two talked about their day. Robbie has a date with Linda Perdy, and Rocky told him about how he keeps getting these love letters from people. Robbie quieted after that, no doubt jealous that Rocky would even consider one of them to date. But Rocky really isn't interested in relationships, especially with people only interested because they wanna fix his wounded heart- They act like its a rule that because you look good, you _have_ to date someone because, afterall, being alone is for ugly people. That's the way the world thinks and it makes Rocky sick.

Or maybe Robbie hopes that after all that trauma Rocky shouldn't even be thinking about people in that way, and should instead be afraid forever. That wasn't gonna happen because even the worst things in life pass.

After a while, Rocky said he was going to bed and Robbie joined him. He waited an hour before he got up and dressed, then snuck out. He wasn't sure if he could follow Andre's directions so well from a quick scribble on a napkin, but he just had to find the place. Turning at the next light, his eyes kept glancing into the rear view mirror. Memories flood his mind of that night when he was chased through the streets then abducted. Shaking them away he takes in a breath then presses on the gas just a bit more; the sooner he gets this over with the happier he'll be.

L.A streets are always the busiest at night, crawling with people, walking, driving, skateboarding when they know they shouldn't be, sometimes joggers. Rocky watched the lights pass him by, each one flashier than the last until he finally came across a sign in big red letters reading: Heat Wave. Gathering his nerves, he steps out from his car being sure to press the lock once the door was closed. Blue eyes flicking left then right he doesn't like the looks he's receiving from people, so lusty and hungry.

Rocky was ready to turn around right then and there when someone began to approach him. Remembering that he is supposed to be posing as Sin, he tries to relax. If Andre was accurate in his knowledge of people's feeling for the essentric male, then he knew that this sort of thing was going to happen a lot, but better it be a small crowd than the whole room.

"Sin!" The man called out waving a hand.

_Shit._ Panicked the imposter. _How would Sin greet somebody?_ Unsure he just decides to glare the best he can.

"Whoo! Look out everybody, someone's shooting ice shards." He throws an arm around the shorter male like the shards didn't phase him one bit.

"What do you want?" Not-Sin snarled.

"Nothing, why do I have to want something?" He lets go, then starts walking idly around the car. "I've just never seen you in a car before, is it yours?"

"Hn. I borrowed it from my idiot twin. Guy doesn't suspect a thing."

"Very nice, well tell him he has excellent taste in cars." The brunet set his arm around him again, then he starts to walk him toward the crowded club. "But you should be nice to your brother, someday he may have to bail you out of some serious shit."

"Doubt it, he'd probably wet his self if he ever knew what kind of trouble I was in."

Two other guys come up laughing, and they also link an arm around him in someway. It took Rocky's entire storage of strength not to shake them off, but at the same time it was releaving a bit to have people that are regulars to Sin. He didn't think he picked out anyone as a friend just a fuck- if that term is still in use.

"So whose for dancing?" Asks a blond.

"Count me in! I've been stuck at work all fucking morning." Says a moody looking black haired male already starting some kind of drunken bop once he moved into the flow of the crowd.

"I wanna get a drink first." Rocky says pulling away from them; he can hear the tall brunet saying that he's definitly pissy tonight about something.

Good he's fooled them, which means no one else will recognize him either. Walking through the tidal wave of sufficating skin-on-skin contact, clothing that shows way too much to leave anything up for imagination, and some people who just outright looked ridiculous dancing, he found the bar.

"Hey Rocky." Greets Andre with a know-it-all grin.

Wide eyed, Rocky holds a finger to his mouth telling him to quiet down. "How did you know it was me?" He leaned forward to whisper.

"Something about the way you walk just isn't like Sin, but if you're trying to be him... I can help you keep up the act."

"Thank you." He let out a relieved sigh, and is very glad to have a friend on the inside during this should things get uncomfortable.

"The usual?" He asks getting the drink when Rocky nods.

"So what does Sin usually do when he gets here?" He sips at his lemon lime soda, surprised that it is soda. Stopping his drinking when he wants to speak, he asks. "Who does he associate with?"

"Usually, he dances until someone wants to sleep with him."

Rocky chokes on his drink, coughing through the pained gulp, he waves away the offered pat on the back. "Does he do this every night?"

"No," he shakes his head. "Sometimes he just dances, or he hangs out with me."

"Thank god. No one will get wise if I just sit here."

"Sin," He says keeping appearance. "your _hot_, even your brother. People are gonna come up to you."

"So how does he turn them down?"

"Tell 'em to fuck off." He shrugs. "But you're gonna have to use more attitude in your voice. Listen, I like you, but Sin is like my little brother so I don't want you to ruin his reputation around here."

Rocky nodded, feeling a little hurt that he doesn't have that sort of commitment from any of his friends.

"Which reminds me, those three over there," he points over Rocky's head. "The brunet is Thom, the blond is Jefferson, and the black haired guy is Oleg. They hang around Sin when he isn't off someplace else; and here is your list of hopefuls tonight."

"He has waiting list?"

"Yup. Want me to tell them to back off?"

Rocky is looking over the list, but he shakes his head to the question. This is what he wanted, to find out what Sin has been up to and this is the best way to do it. Its just disturbing how comfortable everyone is with it. "No, but can you find one of them for me?"

"Can't leave the bar, but they usually sit at that table back there." He points over Rocky's head again to a table in the far corner of the room.

Its made of glass and has a blue electric light running around it making it look less than inviting.

"Wish me luck." He slides from the stool.

"I'll send Bruce up if things get messy for you, don't worry." Holding up his hand, he shouts over the music. "Ten minutes?"

Nodding, the undercover male makes his way through the crowd trying to loosen himself up a little more, so that he doesn't stick out as himself too much. Reaching the table he's surprised to see someone is already seated there waiting for him. Smiling at a man sitting there, he notices the drink in his hand. The man looks up at whom he thinks is Sin, and a huge grin breaks out on his face.

"Nice to finally meet you, Sin. I've heard a lot about you." Gesturing with his hand, he says. "Have a seat. Want a drink?"

"No." Rocky crossed his arms over his chest, assuming that's what Sin would do.

The man took a big gulp then set the glass down. "Then there's no reason for us to remain down here is there. Come on."

Getting up from the table he follows after the maan to a set of stairs. Rocky threw a look over his shoulder to Andre, who was thankfully still watching him. The bartender held up six fingers once then seven.

"13?" He questioned.

"What?" Asks the man looking back.

"I said room 13." He assumed that's what the bartender was getting at.

"I know. Ha, everybody knows."

_This mans gotta be nearing his fourties, and he's hitting on me- planning to sleep with me?! Well, Sin. Its sick!_ Walking down the hall, he opens the door then closes it turning the lock over.

Tonight's guest was already undressing; Rocky walked uneasily around the room casting a side-long glance at him as he does this. He's wondering how this works. Who initiates the first move? How far does one go?

After the uncomfortable silence, the man finally speaks. "What? Don't I get the song and dance?"

"Hm?"

"Everyone's always buzzing about the lap dance you give."

_I'm gonna kill him._ Rocky thinks about his alter.

But swallowing hard, he pulls out the chair under the small work desk. "Sit down."

"Yes sir." The man grinned.

Rocky wanted to vomit, moreso when some actually came up leaving him to swallow it back down. How could he think that he wanted to do this? He's completely unprepared, and frankly, he'd like to have this near-pedophile arrested for even looking at him. But Sin did lie about his age to get in here. Who's to say what this man, and any of the others believe.

The pervert removed his button down and dropped it to the floor, from there he opens his pants then pulled them down and off, but he left his boxers on thankfully. "Am I allowed to touch?" He asks casually while tugging his boxers down just below his nether region, leaving himself exposed but still somewhat dressed.

"No." He says quickly, and was glad that the man had asked.

"You tease."

Rocky's skin crawled, and his hair pricked. "Shut up."

"Harsh." He smirked. With lust filled eyes, he watches the vixxen pace the room. "Are you gonna whip me later?"

"I said shut up!"

The man made a gesture like a zipper going across his mouth.

_How the hell am I gonna get out of this one? _Glancing about the room, he spots a door. "I have to get ready!" Jutting his thumbs over to the bathroom door, he moves over that way. "I'm gonna get dressed in the bathroom, so it'll be a surprise when I come out."

Reaching out, he grabs Rocky by the ass- he literally pulled him over by a pinch of his ass!- just to draw him in close. "I like what you have on now."

Wriggling to get free, he shoved the man hard enough to knock the chair back. The nameless stranger tumbling to the floor, and laughed completely undetered from his lustful state. Rocky crossed the room to the bathroom.

"I'll be right back," Rocky says more firmly when seeing the man get up from the floor with a lecherous grin. "If you don't wanna do as I say, than you can go the fuck back downstairs!" Slipping into the bathroom he practically slammed the door shut behind him.

_Bastard! How dare he touch me... How dare he try to force me... This was a stupid idea, I never should have come here._

_**I couldn't agree more. **_Snickered a familiar voice. Sin clapped his hands together to applaud him. _**Bravo Rock', you've managed to get all the way up here... so now what?**_

"I'll think of something." He whispered to his reflection that's sneering down at him from his shrunken place on the floor, it was a look almost like a wolf tracking its prey, and the idiot Deer stopped for some grass.

_**Like what? You don't have the brains or the balls to immitate me properly, so why don't you just crawl back into the hole where I store you and let me take care of this- I'll even let you watch, so you know nothing bad is going on.**_

Sneering, Rocky closes his eyes. "I managed to get this far haven't I? And as for your offer, I'll pass." Pressing his back to the door, he listens to the man humming on the other end.

Sin watched his twin freak out inside, so much so that his body is actually shaking at the thought of leaving the bathroom. Despite his behavior, he doesn't like seeing Rocky like this. It always stirs something in him, the memory of that first day, his first time. Why can't Rocky see that this life he's flashing before his eyes, is only a clever way to make him realize that all this can stop if he just accepts his true self. Then He can be responsible for himself, and Sin doesn't have to babysit anymore, they can be one. Harmony.

"Rocky please... you're terrified... Just let me take care of this, and right after you can take control again and leave the whole damn place."

Rocky sniffled from his place on the floor, he has his ears covered and his eyes shut tight while he collects his self. "Okay."

"Hm?"

"I said okay, please just don't... don't let that guy get carried away, something about him seems a little too eager."

"I'm always careful." He smiled with ease.

Rocky would have jumped out of his skin when the man knock loudly on the door, if Rocky were out when he knocked.

"I've changed my mind about the dance, let's just do this thing. I got a phone call, something about an emergancy... so I have to be home early." He called through the door.

Sin pulled the door open being greeted with a nude 30 something year old in his sights. Gaze dropping to the man's lap, he smiles inwardly. "Let's get this over with then."

...

The two of them walk over to the bed, Sin stripping down as they do so. He straddles the man's hips after knocking him down onto his back on the bed. He let out a pleasured sigh only to increase the man's enjoyment of thinking that He is enjoying it as much as he is. But frankly it's not doing a thing for him, despite his erection. None of them ever did it for him really, he isn't interested in the person or what they do. He just wants to satify the hunger in his self for something pretty close to love.

"I don't want you to kiss me," Sin whispers against the man's neck.

This man only grunts in response since his mind is elsewhere anyway. Both of them hard, Sin spreads the man's legs apart setting them around his hips, and when he moves in all thought for them stops... Their worlds become nothing but pushing in, and being filled and not...

Laying in the bed together, when its all over Sin is wondering what the hell is going on with him? He feels weird. Very weird. Is it because Rocky is watching him? He's never felt ashamed of himself when others watch him get a blowjob, or he gives one to someone right at the table, or they have tantric grind sessions in the back hallway where the bathroom is, so than why now does he wanna scrub himself?

Eric, as the man told him his name is when he wanted to hear it moaned, threw his arm around Sin cuddling him close as he places kisses on his shoulder. "That," he kisses him on the shoulder again. "Was amazing, beyond all I could have ever imagined."

"Cuddling will cost you." Says Sin absently.

Eric merely laughed, kissing his shoulder again. "So the illustrious Sin can be bought, huh?"

"That's what I said." Eric has to here his bland tone, is he that interested? Or maybe he gets off on repulse.

"Alright, how much for a make-out session since you wouldn't let me kiss you?"

Looking over his shoulder at the man, he says in a flat voice. "I don't kiss. If I say I don't want to that's the end of it."

"Alright then, how much would it cost for _me_ to top _you_?" He asked in all seriousness.

Sin thought it over. The Douglas' will probably kick Rocky out when they find out his little secret, so it would be good if he had a place of his own to live in once college was over. Rocky would never leave school on his own, he's too much of a goody-goody, and he's too smart for to flunk out, but afterwards he'll need a life. And if he can get a lump sum of starter cash then he should really jump on the opportunity- after all its just sex.

"Give me a hundred thousand, and you can have your night with me."

The man scoffed, running a hand through his thick dark hair; he has thick hair on his legs and chest as well. Sin hates hairy guys. Eric leaned over and kissed him on the cheek before saying. "For you, anything." Slipping out of bed, he grabs his clothes. "I really must be going though, thank you for the lovely time."

"Whatever."

"Aha, are you always this cold with people? They should call you iceman." Writing down his address on a pad of paper in the room, he winks at Sin before walking out.

Shuddering, he felt sick, the same kind of nausea he had the first time he came out to take one for his charge. _I need a shower._ Moving from the bed he goes into the bathroom and starts the shower water.

7 7 7

Rocky snuck back in late last night. He made sure to make a mental note that Sin showed himself around 11:30, which meant that must be the usual time he awakens to take over him when he sleeps.

Robbie was still laying in bed, eyes shut as he lightly snoozed away.

Rocky sighed in relief that he'd managed to pull it off with only minor damage done to his person; he sure would like to know what the hell Sin and that man were talking about when the mental picture, and sound shut off suddenly. It makes him nervous all over again. Bad enough he felt sick the entire time he watched this ordeal take place, but to have to miss out on the end when the personal conversations shared between a part of him and some stranger went on just makes him shutter.

Folding the clothes up, he sets them back in their hiding place then lays in bed.

"Where were you?"

"I went for a walk?"

"It's one in the morning, that must have been some walk." Robbie doesn't even sound tired.

Did he wake up some time in between his departure or from the get go?

"I just had to look in on something."

"Sin, I swear if you hurt Rocky, I'll tell everyone I can about you." He said in serious tone, when sitting up.

Rocky was silent for a moment, shock and disbelief play across his expression. He's never heard that sort of tone from Rocky before. But what Robbie said sank in right then. "...How long have you known?"

Blinking, he sits up on his elbow. "Rocky, I'm sorry I just... I've known for days now about this other guy. He told me not to tell anyone about him."

"And you listened?" Rocky is perplexed by this. Who is Sin to convince Robbie to keep secrets for him, not to mention how could Robbie listen? "Robbie, whatever he's offering you, you have no right to take. Nor should you be keeping things from me."

He waves his hands out in defense. "So far he hasn't told me anything, I just know that he's been sneaking out sometimes." He swallows over a dry lump in his throat. "I lied anyway, whatever he planned on telling me I was going to tell to you the minute I knew you were out."

"I see... but you didn't think to follow him?"

"I tried it once or twice, but he always knew I was there." He looks at his lap with a guilty expression. "He hits on me, even kisses me... I knew you wouldn't like that, so I left it alone. I really don't think he's doing anything other than dancing or hanging out."

Rocky shakes his head. "You're right." He lied somewhat.

He doesn't want Robbie to know what Sin has been up to, and he's sort of proud of him for resisting considering how he feels about him. But does Robbie consider Sin a different person? Most wouldn't aside from the charge and alter themselves. It seems he does have a least one noble friend afterall.

"He did ask that I help him, though."

"Help him, with what?"

"I'm not sure of what exactly, but he hates the idea of you talking with your therapist."

"Interesting... Robbie can I ask you to-.."

"I'll trick him, of course. I wanna know what he's up to as well."

Smiling, Rocky closed his eyes now that his pajamas are on and he's in bed. "Thank you."

Robbie smiled a reply, then got back into bed.

8 8 8

The next day.

Rocky showed up for therapy. Dr. Maxim called him in saying that he's found someone to hypnotize him, if he was sure he still wanted to do it. Rocky was more than ready to; he wants to know things, he has to get to the bottom of his caved-in past. Why does Sin exist? What happened to him that he's so sure he'll freak out? Wasn't Maria bad enough, what more could there be?

"Hello Samuel, my name is Gordon Huffman." He holds out a hand to him.

He shakes his hand. "Hi. Nice to meet you."

"Just take a seat and we'll get started."

Rocky sits down making sure that he's comfortable. "Should I have someone here with me for this?"

"What do you mean?"

Unsure of hurting someone or insulting them he says. "Because I'll be under and I don't know, I just don't really trust people all that much these days."

Holding his hand up, Dr. Maxim says. "I understand, but you're in safe hands here Mr. Douglas. Just relax and do as Dr. Huffman says, please."

Nodding, Rocky takes a deep breath then relaxes.

"Count backwards from ten." Asks Dr. Huffman placing his hands under Rocky's jaws.

"10... 9... 8... 7..." He can feel his eyes drooping, "6... 5..." his eyes completely close.


	16. A Friend in Tum

Chapter 16.

"3. 2. 1. Sleep."

Rocky's weight sags down on the small couch; but what was a tiny tip-over in real life, felt like an endless plummet in his mind. He feels like screaming, laughing, and crying all at the same time as he travels through his mind. Whispers from conversations he assumes he's had through-out his life wash against his ears, until he finally lands within his self in some unfamiliar place. Panting hard; he can feel a hand sliding up his chest, he can hear someone laughing in a flirtatious way. Gods but the person's soft touches feel so good.

_-Rocky? Can you see yourself? Tell me what's happening?_

_**Tell you what's happening? How can I tell you I'm having sex with someone?**_ Thinks the male._** But I hear music, so maybe I'm not too far back and I'm just at Heat Wave inside of Sin.**_

He moaned out loud on accident, when the man flipped him over on the bed to nibble around his navel. He can feel the mans thick hair within his hands it seems that he's trying to push him away but only pretending to actually want him away. It was weird to see and feel him clamping his thighs together for the man to then jamb his manhood between his legs before dropping hi weight down on him, but his weight against his body was so goo-...

_-Rocky, you need to tell me what you're seeing. This will only work if-..._

_**I'm at a club with some guy, and we're being intimate.**_ He admits unwillingly. His breath catches again when the man licks his way down from his neck all the way down to his-...

Both Maxim and Huffman look away, feeling really uncomfortable with the fact that Rocky is unwillingly exampling excitement from what this man is doing to him. Maxim had no idea that Rocky is gay, he never would have guessed; but, considering all that's happened to him with this woman, it isn't uncommon in male rape to sort of swap sexual orientations whether the person who assalted them is male or female. Its want for control of what happened in their life for some and with others its quiet defeat of pure terror of the opposite sex. This isn't something he wants the Douglas's to know of, because he's sure that Rocky doesn't even know he revealed it.

Through with the situation, Huffman taps Rocky on the shoulder. -_I'm sending you someplace else._

_**Wait! He's speaking to me...**_

With an unsure face, he removes his hands from the boy then lets him proceed.

Eric, as the man told him his name is, threw his arm around Sin cuddling him close as he places kisses on his shoulder and neck. "That," he kisses him on the shoulder again. "was amazing, beyond all I could have ever imagined."

"Cuddling will cost you." Says Sin absently.

Eric merely laughed kissing his shoulder again. "So the ellustrious Sin can be bought, huh?"

"That's what I said."

"Alright. How much for a make-out session, since you wouldn't let me kiss you?"

Looking over his shoulder at the man, he says in a flat voice. "I don't kiss. If I say I don't want to that's the end of it."

"Alright then, how much would it cost for _me_ to top _you_?" He asked in seriousness.

Sin thought it over. The Douglas's will probably kick Rocky out when they find out his little secret anyway, so it would be good if he had a place of his own to live in once college was over. Rocky would never leave school he's too smart for that, but afterwards he'll need a life and if he can get a lump sum of starter cash then he should really jump on the opportunity- after all its just sex.

"Give me a hundred thousand and you can have your night with me."

The man scoffed running a hand through his thick dark hair; he has thick hair on his legs and chest as well. Sin hates hairy guys. Eric leaned over and kissed him on the cheek saying. "For you, anything." Slipping out of bed, he grabs his clothes. "I really must be going though, thank you for the lovely time."

"Whatever."

"Aha, are you always this cold with people? They should call you iceman." Writing down his address on a pad of paper in the room, he winks at Sin before walking out.

Shuddering, he felt sick, the same kind of nausea he had the first time he came out to take one for his charge. _I need a shower._ Moving from the bed he goes into the bathroom and starts the shower water.

_-What are you hearing?_ Asks Maxim.

_**I'm talking to him about meeting at his place... he wants to have sex with me instead of me having sex with him.**_ He frowns.

Maxim found that interesting because from that comment it was almost as though Rocky was inside of someone else's head instead of his own, and he was finding out dirty and unpleasent secrets.

_**Whoa. **_He says out of surprise as he's dropped into another time of day.

Rocky is telling them about what he's seeing, his being trapped by Maria- somethng that he wants to know about very much, luckily the session is being taped for just this occassion. Then he spoke about how scared he was going off to college, and about having a room all to his self and how nervous he was about a girl he met because after his break up with a girl named Emily. He said he called her but got no reply, so he and the new girl went to a movie that night. Nothing happened beyond that.

Taken back to another time, he's telling them about a conversation between his self and a girl who isn't responding. Its an intimate visit with a girl in a mental clinic. The more Rocky spoke the more Maxim was beginning to think this was a bad idea, because a lot of the boy's most frightened moments exist with his sadness rather than just fear alone. Someone shouldn't be telling people things with no free will to do so. He knows that he would never want it, so why allow someone else to have to endure it, wake up, and find out about what they've said.

Further down the years Rocky speaks constantly about a boy named Sin that he's playing with and something that has to do with throwing rocks. They seem to argue about this alot, he's actually been saying a lot of strange things when speaking with this boy Sin, almost like there were two of him. A girl named Emily came up alot as well, the two of them sound like somewhat of a childhood love story gone bad considering the girl refused his call when he got to college. Then he spoke about his encounter with Maria on several occassions, the kidnapping which he knew about, the school meeting another thing he knew about, then Rocky stopped talking. He seems to be in a great amount of pain.

_**Ow! Stop it!**_ He screams at someone whose hurting him. _**Stop it!**_ He's tossed into another memory. He looks around at all the staring faces in a place that appears to be the classroom of his school.

"Mr. Douglas?" Says the teacher. "Are you all right?"

With dishevveled nods he lowers his head at the children's laughter. He's always felt awkward and out of place when in public. Looking down at his Power Ranger stamped pencils he wonders for a moment whether or not his mother was gonna remember his poster board for his science project that's due in a week, she keeps forgetting it when she comes home from work and time is only ticking further and further away from his completing it without it.

_-Rocky?_

Lifting his head, he wonders whose voice it is that he's picking up on right now, and who is this Rocky?

_-Rocky can you hear me? Have you found your past self? Where are you?_

Turning his head this way and that he's wondering which of his classmates it projecting their thoughts so loudly, and with such a manly voice. Could it be someone in the hall? He's never been able to listen that far before but since there are no Rocky's in this class it must be.

_-Maxim there's something wrong, I can't reach him. Rocky, are you in there?_ He asks with more persistance.

_-There's the problem, Rocky went only by Samuel until he was eleven or so, he must be younger than that. Samuel, Samuel can you hear us? I want you to nod if you can._

Shocked at what he's hearing he slowly, uncertain if he should, nods his head. Rocky's body moved a bit, head nodding. The two Doctors share a smile. Its working, now they can get to the bottom of Rocky's trauma and finally let the boy be free from his past.

_-Now Samuel, I want you to get outside of yourself so that you can let us know what is going on without causing a dilema in your memories. Just relax and let yourself go._

Young Rocky closed his eyes and breathed in deeply- in then out.

_**I'm at school.**_ He sounds very much asleep right now, as deep as anyone can go._** Second grade, seven years old.**_

_Seven?_ Thinks Maxim. _He did skip many years but he told me that something happened to him when he was eight as well._

_**School is out and I'm leaving... I don't see my mom any where and she's always the first car at the curb.**_

Young Rocky takes a seat on the bench outside of the building, head down feet clasped together he waits for the familiar honk of their car horn, while the other students file out of the building like ants that had water sprayed at them. Each kid giggling or messing around, some heading for the buses, others are grabbing bikes.

_**Mom always said that I was too young to ride my bike to school that I could do it when I'm older.**_

The school grew more silent as the students clear out. Rocky's been waiting for a half an hour now, he's beginning to lose faith that she's gonna show up. Standing, and ready to walk home, he's surprised to see that he's become basically alone. Huffy, he defeatedly heads to the curb, that was when a car pulled up. Its a dark red, and small- like a sports car. He admires the car for a second, then continues to head to the sidewalk.

"Samuel?" Calls someone he's never met.

Stopping, he looks over his shoulder to see that the person who'd called his name is the driver of the sports car.

"Hello." He greets but adds afterwards. "I'm not supposed to talk to strangers. Sorry lady."

_-Samuel, what are you seeing now?_

_**A woman is talking to me, dark hair... kind of chubby but not really.**_

"Your mother told me she had to take you brother to get a tooth pulled, and Mrs. Hart couldn't come because she's at work." With the toss of her head to gesture for him to come over, she says. "I work in the same office as your mother, Samuel... She asked me to give you a ride home."

Unsure of whether or not this woman is telling the truth, young Rocky nods then climbs into the car. After all, she knows about his brother's bad tooth, and that his mother's back up plan for whenever she can't make it is calling Emily's mom. This woman must be someone from the office.

_**I got into a car that I don't recognize... She's bringing me ho-...**_ His face twist into anguish and pain before he begins to cry.

"Wake him up Huffman. This is enough."

"Right." Setting his hands under the males jaws. "When I count to three you will wake up refreshed, and with the memory of everything you've seen."

Rocky's eyes shot open, glaring at first then they became sad but not quick enough to be missed by Doctor Maxim.

"Did you find out anything?" Asked the ninja.

"Its all on tape." Says Maxim.

Cocking a brow, Huffman says. "You don't remember what you've said?" Scratching his chin, he thinks. "That's strange, you were supposed to recall everything."

"Yeah well, looks like you goofed somewhere." Replies the blond, then adds. "But its ok right, because you've got it on tape." He looks at the object rolling away on the desk. "May I have it Doc. I think maybe if I listen to it over it will come back to me."

"Perhaps in another session we can listen to it together."

Narrowing his eyes he vanishes the look again. "What will it benefit you by listening to it? I'm the one with slight amnesia."

"Yes, but with special cases like yourself, its really better that you're supervized when memories come back."

"Right."

The door to the office opened and in walks Jessica Douglas in a serious huff. "Doctor Maxim I got here as fast as I could. Rocky are you ok?" She asks pulling the male into her arms.

Rocky grimanced when the woman touched him, but he hugged her back. "I'm fine." He replies.

Moving from the hug, Jessica looks at Huffman. "When was this session authorized? And who are you?"

"Mom I asked them to do it. I thought maybe I would remember everything that'd happened, if someone could help me do it."

"Well I wish you would learn to tell the family next time, you know I worry about you."

"I'm sorry." It was dry and tight.

Maxim cocked a brow at how the boy is acting all of a sudden. Something is definitely going on here.

"I'd better get back to school."

"No. You're coming home with me today, you need to rest."

"Mom, I'm not a kid, I don't need naps after traumatic times."

Shaking her head, she hoist her purse up a bit saying. "You're coming home anyway, we need to talk and be around each other more." Touching a hand to his cheek, she sighs. "We miss you, baby."

"Okay." As he's about to walk out, he turns around. "But I have to ask Doctor Maxim something in private first, can you please wait for me outside?"

Looking from her son to the clueless doctor, she finds herself unable to say no so she nods then walks out. Rocky closed the door, turning the lock over as well.

"I want that tape." He states rather bluntly.

"I'm afraid you can't have it. It belongs to my patient."

His eyes flinch, a bit shocked at the way his decline is stated. "So then you know?"

Maxim shakes his head moving from his seat at the rim of the desk, he takes the recorder with him. "Not all the details." He clears his throat as he takes a seat in his leather reclining chair. "But from what I can tell, you're not Rocky."

"Imagine that, you do have a brain up there. You've probably been the only one smart enough to figure it out right off." He steps over to the desk.

"How long has this been going on?" Asks the man wishing for full details, tape recorder going.

"Mm. I'd say years, many years infact." Slowly he steps around to the other side of the desk. "Rocky can barely hold me back, what makes you think that you can?"

"Because I have something you want." Meaning the casset tape.

Smiling with sly eyes he kneels down. "Give it to me, and I'll pay you back for the favor." His hands land on the zipper of the doctor's brown slacks. "Ahaha," He chuckles flirtatiously. "I've seen the way you look at Rocky. You're thinking impure thoughts about him just like everyone else does." He slides his hands up and down the man's thick thighs, receiving a low sigh before he's pushed off.

"You're mistaken, as I'm neither a pedophile or a homosexual." Unphased sexual, but whoely fed-up. He sighs again and explains. "I see my son when I look at him. Nothing more."

"Ahaha, your son? Right." Standing, he walks away from the desk. "Well, Doc... might I suggest you keep your mouth shut about this, I wouldn't wanna have to suddenly forget what happened to your beloved son."

He doesn't want to believe it, but he felt his heart jump at the very idea that someone knows what's happened to his son. "You know what happened to-... No. You couldn't know, you're lying so you can get the tape."

Snickering, Sin grabs a hold of the door knob. "Maybe you're right... but can you really take that risk? Tell anyone about me and your son's memory... is dead."

Swallowing hard, aggitated, yet curious. "What do you want?"

"One month of freedom and I'll give you all the information I know about your son."

"But how can you-..."

"You'll find that I know a lot of things about a lot of people, and that I can do a lot of things as well." With a smirk he positions his index and middle fingers like he's gonna flick something, and when his fingers part a tiny vase on the shrink's desk pops off of it and falls to the floor. With a laugh Sin closed the door, leaving behind one frightened and confused Maxim to mull over his thoughts.

The ride home was very quiet on Sin's part. He has _nothing_ to say to that woman and he never will, but Jessica insisted on talking to him. She wanted to stop for lunch and maybe hang out at the mall or something. Does she really think that even Rocky would wanna do that? Nevermind he thought, I'm out, and thanks to that hack Huffman Rocky is stuck in a memory somewhere in our shared mind. Its sad to think of his charge suffering as he does everyday, but hey, freedom is freedom and fun is fun. He's not gonna let anyone ruin this opportunity for him. One month, that's his word... and he never betrays his own words with lies. He'll save Rocky and he can have his somewhat life back, but for now he has to make plans for what he's gonna do. Who he's gonna see? Where he'll go. Its enough to make him dizzy with excitement.

The car rolls up the driveway. Much to Sin's horror, Rocky's childhood nightmare- in his opinion- Emily, is waiting at the front door.

Smiling, Jessica points her out as though he's blind and or stupid. "Look, there's Emily." She turns her gaze to him. "I didn't know she was still in town."

_Hn. As big as she is, she's always been in town. She need only turn in this direction._ The alter rolled his eyes. _Hey Emily, say hello to Florida for me._

The two climb out of the car. The young woman walking up to them has a sad smile on her face, and can barely meet with Sin's eyes- which is fine with him.

"Hello Emily, you look well." Greets Mrs. Douglas, giving her a quick hug and kiss on the cheek.

"Hello Mrs Douglas..." Shyly she entwines her fingers together before then daring a look at whom she thinks is Rocky. "Can I talk to you in private, Sam?"

"W'ever." He replies, walking hunch backed with hands in pockets, he enters the house.

Confused the two women glance at one another as if asking 'did he just say w'ever?'

"Rocky just got out of therapy, actually, so he's a little drained... but I'm sure he'll want to talk with you. Come in."

"Thanks."

Walking inside they hear Rocky in the kitchen talking to his younger brother about something as he fixes his self a glass of orange juice.

"You really went under hypnosis? That's so cool- I always thought that stuff was fake."

"It is if you don't know what you're doing." Replies Sin taking his drink down in two solid gulps then he sets the glass down with a refreshed 'aaaahh'.

"So this guy did?" Tum tum cocks a brow at his brothers odd behavior.

Too odd in fact! And if Tum Tum's suspicions were right, which they *cough* seldom are, his brother isn't his self anymore.

"He sure did, and I feel great." He leans over the island counter, smiling at his little brother. "He said some mumbo jumbo stuff, told me, that if I accepted everything that's happened to me, I will live on and be perfectly fine."

Cocking a brow, he asks skeptically. "And that's all it took?"

"That's all it took."

"Great. Now we can hang out like we used to."

"Uhh, aheh heh, yeah." Seeing Emily and his mother walk in, he goes over to the girl grabbing her by the wrist. Sin then leads her upstairs to his room so they can... talk.

When the door closes the two sit on the bed. Neither one is saying anything. The room is lit up with the Saturday afternoon sun coming in through the open window. But that didn't seem to brighten the atmosphere or put conversation in their mouths. The silence was almost deafening until, finally, Sin looks at her saying.

"Well?"

"Rocky... I'm sorry about before." She looks down at her lap. "I know you meant well, I do! But that can't happen between us anymore. I'm... what I mean to say is that, I'm no longer attracted to you."

_Is she serious? As if Rocky has even the smallest bit of interest in her anymore. Ha! If she only knew the reason that he almost climbed into bed with her was to prove me wrong, boy she'd run screaming._ Scratching the side of his face, he coughs then sniffs then says. "Oh." Very much like Rocky would.

"I'm sorry. I know that you thought I came here trying to work things out with you but, I really just wanted to see that you were all right and... assure you that you've always got a friend in me." Shaking her head for a second, she asks. "Excuse me?"

"I said, what makes you think that I wanted it?" He looks at her blinking expression. "I mean, you chose to come to _me_, not the other way around. For all you know you could have really messed up years of happiness, due to me thinking that I'd never see you again."

"Rocky," her lips form words but nothing comes out until. "Where is this coming from?"

He shrugs. "I'm just tired of every girl I come across thinking that I'm broken, and need someone to cling to for safety and friendship when I don't. Emily... I hate you."

"You hate me?"

"When I needed you the most you left me, called me a jerk, and slapped me on top of it!" He chuckled for a moment then adds. "You then said 'I told you so' when you found out that Marissa was a nut job. Tell me, best friend, how am I supposed to have dealt with that?"

"Rocky, I said that I was sorry for that, and I really am."

"I don't need your 'sorrys'... infact, I should be thanking you, because of you... I now know _exactly_ what I want in life and I know how to get it."

Starting to get a bit of an attitude she asks. "Oh really, and what is that?"

"Hi-mi-tsu."

"Himitsu? What does that mean?" She asks.

"It means its a secret Emily. So, if you're now done attempting to crush what little of me there is left to crush, I'm going for a walk. Bye." Placing his hand on her back, he helps her up from the bed with a firm shove.

"You know what Rocky, I used to feel sad for you thinking that you might not recover from this but now," She stops at the entrance of the bedroom. "Now I feel sorry because you've recovered, and your changes are pathetic. I hope you feel better someday."

Wriggling his fingers as a good bye, he closes the door of his bedroom then lays out on his bed. _Now that she's gone, let's hope the rest of this altercation goes smoothly._

He turns his head from the sound of faint knocking on the door. "Hey Rocky, can I come in?"

"Yeah."

Turning his head, he watches Rocky's little brother enter into the bedroom, closing the door after himself. Coming over to the bed the young boy sits down looking him square in the eyes.

Blinking with confusion Sin asks. "Problem?"

"...You're not my brother, are you?"

At first Sin just looked at the boy, but then a sly smile spread across his face as he replies. "No. I'm not."

Laying down beside him he looks up at the ceiling then asks. "If you're not Rocky, then who are you?"

"I go by anything really, but if you must use a name... its Sin."

"Sin? Like the seven deadly ones? Or is it short for something?"

Chuckling, he turns his head leaning over toward the boy's ear so he can whisper something to him; it makes Tum tum laugh. Sin laughs as well, to the point of grabbing his stomach.

"So, what are you doing here? Where did you come from?"

Sin twisted his lips thinking about that. Then he says. "I came from a super charged electrolite in your brother's mind at a time when he was really really scared and lonely. He's been coming to me ever since to help him get through his fears ever since."

"I wondered about that," he looks over at Sin. "I don't know much about this sort of thing but, most of the time when someone does it on television- splits personalities I mean- the alter wants to protect the person that's hiding."

"Not always." He says simply.

"Yeah but I can tell that you want to, and that makes me happy rather than scared." With a shrug he continues. "Normally, something like this would scare the hell out of me, but seeing as how you wanna protect Rocky... I feel all right about it."

Crossing his ankles he smiles. "You're dumb. But its a sweet dumb, so don't change- alright?" He knocks on the boy's head.

"Hey! I'm not dumb! You jerk." Knocking back, he laughs when the alter tries again to pop him on the head.

"Yes, you aaaare!" He laughs out, moving away from the younger male's swings at him.

The two grab a pillow then swat at each other bouncing about the room in a small pillow fight, laughing too hard to get words out anymore. When Sin was batted to the floor by his brother, the door swung open nearly scaring the two.

"What is going on up here?" Asks Jessica.

"We were just hanging out." Explains Sin.

"Yeah, nothing wrong."

Unsure of that, she shakes her head. "I made lunch, come down and eat when you're ready."

"Okay."

When the woman cast them a curious eye before closing the door, Sin waits until she's gone before saying. "Mut mut listen, I can't have you telling anyone about me. Okay?"

"I won't tell." He shakes his head. "I promise."

"Good." Getting up from the floor, he holds out his pinky. "Friends?"

Laughing, Tum tum puts his pinky to Sin's then says. "Friends." After a thought he adds. "Question though?"

"Yeah?"

"Mut Mut?"

Sin laughed as he left the question of his reversed name unanswered, before walking out the door.


	17. Tenderness

Chapter 17

"Hey Rocky!" Called Colt's friend, Ryan, from the kitchen.

Cocking a brow at the stranger calling his charges's name, Sin slowly moves forward toward the kitchen. Sin finds it hard to believe that Rocky had- at some points in his life- managed to block him out from any event or knowledge in his life for a good amount of time. He actually found it a bit strange that with all thats happened to him, the boy found happiness- although, Rocky did call him forward whenever things got to be a little too much- or maybe those were accidents?

"We brought pizza to take the pressure off your mom."

"Yeah, for one meal." Chuckled Jessica before biting into a slice of pepperoni.

"Come on, have some." Ryan shoves a box closer to the male's approach.

Walking into the kitchen Sin glanced at the three strangers then said a curt, very Rocky like, "Hi." before taking a slice of sausage and mushroom pizza. His mouth is already watering from the smell alone.

Colt had to make a face at the strange way his brother greeted his friend. Even though- yes- they are HIS friends, Rocky still knows them because he's been to lots of their parties, and gigs, they've even hung out a couple dozen times just to goof around- for lack of goofing on his older brother's part. So why the strange tone now?

"Thanks for bringing lunch, I was starving all morning." He says before taking a big bite.

Closing his eyes from the satisfyingly delicious taste of meat juices and piping hot cheese burning the top of his mouth, Sin was in heaven. It feels good to be out and tasting, using any of the five senses really. Only problem with it is that when he'd opened his eyes, he sees that everyone is staring at him with the curiousity one should put to a twelve toed oddity.

Flicking his eyes back and forth he asks. "Whaat, I left you guys some."

Tum tum had to slap his hand to his forehead on this one. And Sin called himself his brother's protecter- does he even know _anything_ about Rocky to be trying to impersonate him.

"Rocky, sweetie, I didn't know you were eating meat again." Says his mother.

Swallowing, Sin laughs pointing a finger at them all. "Me? Eating meat? Now that _is_ funny," He takes another bite then another before talking. "I quit eating meat; I just thought it would be funny if I suddenly did it again." Dropping the nearly finished slice of food back into the box, he brushed the crumbs from his hands by smacking them together.

"I was just about to tell you we got you a veggie pizza." Says Colt, thumb pointed at an unopened box.

"Oh. Thanks."

His nose scrunching pulled the rest of his face up in a scrunch as well. The nauseating vegetable scent wafts up his nostrils. Shaking hands take a slice from the box of never-to-be-touched-again-beyond-this-frightening- point pizza; swallowing his vomit, he takes a tiny bite from the triangles tip.

"Mmm."

Distraction was all Tum tum could do to keep from laughing out loud about the whole thing, so he shoved his glass of soda in front of his mouth taking a drink.

"I'm gonna eat in my room, please." Sin says quickly wanting to vanquish the pizza from wence it came.

Tum tum spritzed his sip across the island counter hearing that; breaking into a full blown laugh that he just couldn't keep back.

"I'm uncomfortable." Sin says.

Smacking the younger boy hard on the back of his head, he cast an apologetic smile to his mother and friends? He has no idea how to look at those other people. Dashing out of the kitchen he hurries upstairs.

Jessica cocked a brow at his strange behavior, but it must be because of therapy. Rocky may really not want to go to the point of pretending that he's ok. But Rocky does seem off, but in a good- happy- kind of way. Maybe he really is feeling better, and he just needs to find himself again.

"Can I eat upstairs too, please?" Asks Tum tum.

"Go ahead. Don't wipe your hands on anything."

"Mom, I'm sixteen- and driving. I don't do that sort of thing anymore." He grabs some sausage and mushroom and a pepperoni to a plate, then leaves the kitchen and heads upstairs.

_Something's going on._ Thinks Colt. And he's not about to be left out.

Entering his brother's borrowed room over weekends, Tum tosses the plate of pizza on the bed then looks around for Sin, who is in the bathroom exaggerating the taste of vegetables from his mouth with some water and gargling. Snickering, Tum tum knocks on the door.

"I brought you some relief; and some help with this whole charade you're poorly putting on."

Pulling the door open, Sin grinned at the boy- who in his eyes is six rather than sixteen- and grabbed his face to plant a kiss on his forehead. "I owe you Mut mut." Moving passed him, he grabs a slice from the plate; snickering around a bite at Tum tum's groaning at how gross it is to be kissed by anyone other than his girlfriend at that age, his brother most of all!

Continuing the cleansing of his forehead with the back of his hand, as it were a desanitizer, he then takes a seat on the bed next to the alter. "Do you know anything about how Rocky acts? If not, you'd better take my advice because mom is sharper than she looks, and she'll catch on."

Sin is too busy bouncing lightly on the bed as he eats, humming away, to bother listening to the light scolding from Tum Tum.

"Are you listening to me at all?" Questioned the younger boy.

Waving his words off, he answers. "Yeah, yeah. Be more like the wet blanket, got it."

Taking a bite of the vegetable pizza Tum tum scrunches his face then sets it back down on the plate. "Rocky is _not_ a wet blanket... He's great! He's a responsible, kind, and a good leader... Sin, are you really here to help my brother? Or are you the kind of alter that only wants to hurt him so that _you_ can be in charge?"

Stilling himself from his happy little pizza party, the alter sets his slice down on the plate. "No one likes a smartass Mut... Rocky and me go waaay back. I know him inside and out, which is more than I can say about him knowing me."

"What do you mean?"

Saddened a bit, he twists his mouth back and forth in thought for wording. Then with a sigh, he says. "Its simple really, this person that you say is so kind, and so brave, has been torturing me for years... using me... and I just think that its about time I had some," he paused to think then smiled into his words. "_Alone time_. Just enough to spread- eeh, I mean stretch my legs a bit." He clears his throat. "I'm sick of him calling all the shots and making bad decisions, then tossing all the weight on my shoulders when it doesn't work out right."

Tum tum sank hearing that. It made him feel kind of weird, actually, to hear his brother calling his self names- even though he isn't his brother, he doesn't even talk in the same tone as Rocky, but still. How much had Rocky run from things? How long has Sin been around?

_What makes alters?_ Tum began to wonder. _Will Rocky ever be whole again? Or is this the kind of thing you can't be cured of?_

Sin listened to Rocky's younger brother worry himself about dear precious Rocky, who is probably doing fine as he sits pretty in that little home he's made within their mind for when he's tagged out of existance. Tum Tum really can't sit there and judge him when he really doesn't have a clue about what's going on. Ever since that day when Marissa sought him out, Rocky's always been running and leaving him behind to suffer. It really isn't a wonder that the boy turned out so normal and happy since all his cares and worries, his horrible past got erased right before his eyes. But little by little Rocky has begun to remember, Sin knows this because one day he told his father about seeing the others. Sin panicked for a moment, feeling the strains of panic and terror signaling from his charge but whenever the warden told him to stop being crazy, he would listen and leave his thoughts of the 'others' on the floor for Sin to clean up.

If Rocky only knew that all those so-called _spirits_ he's been seeing aren't really ghost. He could never handle that, he could never face the truth about his past and what really made him split. The reason he doesn't remember being raped in the dressing room is because it was He- Sin, who suffered that day; as if he cared, not like it was the first time. The opening bedroom door took both boys' attention from their thoughts as Colt walks in closing the door after him.

"Spill it."

An innocent glance is exchanged between the two boys on the bed. But it was Tum tum who asked. "Spill what?"

"Whatever it is the two of you are doing?" Says the middle child. "You're never this attentive to each other unless you're up to something, and I wanna know what it is."

Sin scoffed grabbing his lunch to finish.

"And that's another thing." Points an accusing finger of Colt's. "Rocky you don't like meat, you must have said the taste bothers you a million times whenever I would shove it under your nose. So what gives?"

"I like sausage," he explains with a shrug. "Who doesn't?"

"Right." Taking a seat between them, he lays back arms folded behind his head. "I'm not leaving until I get some answers."

Again Sin scoffs before muttering. "That could get uncomfortable at bedtime, you sure you wanna own up to those words."

"What?" Colt sits up suddenly feeling naked and not liking it for a second.

"Nothing. If you're done here, I have places to be, people to see." Sin gets up just to be dragged back down by the elbow.

"Oh no you don't." Colt glares his brother in the eyes. "Look, whatever it is you're hiding I'm not gonna tell anyone, so just let me in on it."

Slapping a hand against the male's back, he says. "Tell you what? Why don't you ask Rocky next time you see him. Bye bro." Getting up from the bed, he leaves the room in a hurry.

Blinking, stunned, and beyond confused he looks to his little brother. "Tum tum?"

"Colt, you're gonna have to trust me on this one when I say that you're better not knowing what's going on. I'm still a little confused about it myself... But if you really wanna know, then I'll tell you. But I need a ride to the library."

"Yeah, whatever. Just tell me what's going on."

...

"Waaait a minute." Says Colt as the two of them are passing through the aisles of the shelves of books in the public library. "Are you trying to say that our brother has some sort of alter ego named Sin?"

"I'm not trying to say it, I'm saying it. Sin says he's only around to help Rocky when he comes to him, but that he's also bored of just doing that and he wants to hang out a little bit before going away. He says Rocky is fine though."

Colt shakes his head in disbelief. "Tum tum do you hear yourself? Alters. Mental abilities. You're starting to sound crazy."

"Believe it or not but that guy you saw upstairs and in the kitchen is not Rocky." He stops at a shelf then pulls a book free then advances to the nearest table to read it. "I've got a feeling this isn't the first time we've seen him either. Remember when I told you that Rocky's been acting weird- you even said it yourself that you've seen him outside late at night with lame excuses as for why."

"Yeah, but Rocky has a history of sleep walking."

"I wouldn't know anything about that, I was too young when he was doing it. But I do know that what I see and hear isn't from him."

"But stuff like this only happens in tv shows on sci-fi or some fantasy movie. People don't get alters and they don't move things without touching them. I think what's really going on is that Rocky wants to forget about his problems, so he's made someone up and now he's pretending to be that person." He shrugged. "He'll come around once he realizes he's not in danger anymore."

"Here it is. See." He points out the page.

Taking the book Colt looks it over rather quickly, then slows down on the next go. Reading out loud he says. "An alter ego is a manifestation of another person existing within onesself to relieve stress of a horrible memory; in most cases of sexual assalt."

"And we all know that, regardless of what Rocky says, that sick woman did stuff to him. He doesn't know that Dad told us a bit about what was found in her house. Not even the media knows about it."

Tum tum still feels like throwing up when he remembers his father describing the nude pictures of their brother strung up like a prisoner in the woman's room, and in the cellar of her home. He said that Rocky seemed to be sleeping when they were taken, or maybe he was drugged and unaware of what was going on. The two wouldn't have known even that much had they not demanded and pleaded with their Father to be clued in on their brother's suffering. They want to help him anyway they can, and to do that they have to understand, and be careful about what they say or do.

"But what does all of this mean? That this Sin guy is out to help Rocky by making him forget about his pain?"

With a shrug Tum reads a little more from the book. "That's what the book says, that alters are made to take away pain, but sometimes the pain is too great and the person ends up splitting numerous times, sometimes they come out as men or women regardless the sex of the person that has the alters."

"So Rocky could split off into some female mentality?"

"Sounds like it. But so far I've only met Sin, he seems to be the only one."

"That's good. It'd be weird if Rocky started acting like a girl."

"That's the least of the problem, Colt. If the two of them don't become one when Rocky accepts being kidnapped, we may never really see our brother again. Just the few times here and there whenever Sin lets him out."

Holding a hand to his head trying to rub out a headache, Colt says quietly. "This is all too much to take in. We've gotta tell mom or dad."

"No!"

"Why not?"

"Because Sin asked me not to."

"And so you're taking orders from this guy? Tum, he isn't even real! Don't let him run your life."

"Its not that... I just think that... I think that he may really wanna help Rocky accept what happened to him, but Rocky is the one resisting." Shaking his head slowly, he adds. "I think he might be afraid to because we'll see him as weak."

"What would make him think that?"

"Because we always rely on him, whenever things got bad, we would look to him since he's the oldest, and he would have no one but Sin to go to. Imagine being your own rock... your the person you turn to when you're hurt or scared? Its no wonder Rocky didn't split a long time ago from that alone plauging him."

"I never asked him to be my hero." Colt said in a low voice feeling more guilty than Tum tum. So many times he'd ask Rocky not to tell on him when he snuck out late to parties, so many times he had to get Rocky to cover for him whenever he was doing something reckless. The hangovers he helped him through. All those times they would laugh about their adventures over the summer with Grandpa, never realizing what a strain it put on Rocky.

"Shit."

Knowing exactly what Colt was thinking about Tum added "Yeah." to the weight of the swear.

"How can we help him?"

"By making him come to terms with what happened to him."

"Isn't that what Maxim is for?"

"I don't think he'll help. Rocky is probably holding back in telling him about a lot of things because he doesn't wanna tell his problems to a stranger. That, or he's so used to just shouldering everything and he doesn't really know how to just lay it onto others."

"Then we'll get him to talk to us about it. Once he does, then he'll be back to normal, right?"

"He should."

"Okay... but, what about his gift? How is he gonna deal with being a total freak."

"I don't know... maybe he'll just forget about it if it isn't brought up."

"Could you?"

"Doubt it, but then again, I'd think it was cool. You should have seen him in the park moving those sticks around."

"Its freaky the way life is. Kind of makes you wonder about all those taboo things people tell you not to think about. Maria was a telepath, and she went after Rocky because she knew that he is one. But Rocky didn't know about it until just now I'm guessing. That could be wearing on him too."

"Yeah, but he seemed almost at peace when he was moving those sticks for me."

"Hmm."

Closing the book, Tum tum pulled his library card from his pocket then stood up to leave. "Come on."

7 7 7

Sin snuck up behind a boy a few paces in front of him. Placing his hands over the male's eyes he says. "Guess who?"

Turning around, Andre smiled at his friend. "Hey ugly, what are you up too?"

"Nothing, just enjoying the sunshine... as bright, hot, and annoying as it is."

"Ohh that's right. You're part of the nocturnal crowd, you only come out at night." Mocked the Spaniard.

"That's riiiight." Falling into step beside him, he asks. "Where are you heading?"

"Home." He raises a bag. "Had to buy milk."

"Powerful." Was Sin's response with a teasing laugh.

Andre chuckled a bit. "You say the weirdest things."

"Not all the time." He watches out for a woman passing by that smiled at him and he smiled back. "Do you like me, Andre?"

"Love you to death." The man grinned.

Blinking, Sin turned his head so that he could look at the man's face. "And if you could, you'd want me to stick around? Right?"

"Yeah. Why are you talking like your parents are sending you to military school?"

"Because sometimes I feel like the world is gonna come down on me, gang up, and destroy me."

"So serious you are in the morning. I think I like you better at night." Andre joked.

"Ha, ha." He shoves the male on the arm.

Sin waits as Andre unlocks the door to his home then he follows him inside. Taking in every inch of the place with his green eyes set to memorize, he then dubs it plain and uninteresting: with its pale blue walls, and off-white futuristic cut furniture with the only contrast being from the matching dark wooded items like the coffee table and entertainment stand. Moving on into the kitchen, he looks around for where Andre disappeared to.

"If you're so afraid of your parents, why not move out?"

"I live in a dorm, I practically am 'moved out'. But I can't get my own place without a job."

"So get a job." He stuffs the milk into the fridge.

"Its not that simple to save up wads of cash in one haul, I want out _now_." He leans an elbow on the tiled counter top hating the look of the kitchen more than the living room. "What is with this house?"

"I'd offer you a room here-.."

Cutting him off at the 'but' he says. "Really? Thanks."

Holding up a finger he says. "But, I can't. My woman wouldn't like it."

"You're living with your girlfriend?"

Shaking his head, he starts to pull things from the fridge to fix a sandwich. "She's living with me- married- and believe me I hated the color scheme too, but it really grew on me over time. Sandwich?"

"Yeah." He replies when seeing the plump tomatoes come from the vegetable compartment in the big white box. He may hate vegetables a little bit, but he can't resist a tomato for some reason. "I had no idea you're married."

He shrugged. "So again, I'm suggesting a job." He comments to get back on subject.

"Actually, I might just come in on a nice chunk of change from this guy I met the other night."

"You met a guy- when? I haven't seen you at the club in a while."

Shrugging, he says. "You know, just some guy. It wasn't at the club." He lied seeing as how the night he'd met this gracious money tree was when Rocky dragged him upstairs with him.

"Why do I not like where this is going." He holds up a small piece of turkey for Sin to taste test.

Taking it, he bites and chews then nods for having it in his sandwich. "What's not to like."

"People don't just give you apartment money unless...?" Seeing the look on the male's face he scoffs. "What the fuck Sin, he's gonna pay you to sleep with him?"

"No. He's paying me so he can screw my pretty little ass into another world- or so he claims of his sexual abilities."

"As a friend, I have to say, no."

"Can you do that?"

"I'd like to think so."

"What's the big deal? I sleep with lots of people."

"Yeah, and I'm not too keen on that either..." Shoulder slumped, he sighs. "Sin, I don't usually make this much verbal contact with the people that come to the club. They order a drink I never see them again, and I couldn't care... but with you... I don't know, I just don't wanna see anything happen to you."

"Because of Rock'?" He rolls his eyes.

"No. Because of you- stupid."

Face in disbelief his eyes get dewy. "Andre, you're so sweet I can't stand it." He wipes a fake tear. "But I want out, and I'm going."

"Alright. But I'll fight you, you do know that."

Sin only laughed taking his lunch from his friend. Biting a huge chunk out of it, he looks surprised. "You should quit working as a bartender and head to subway, this is really good."

"Ohh, shut up."

Scoffing, he drops the sandwich on the napkin in front of him then asks. "What? So you hate me now because I found a good way to make money?"

"Its not a good way to make money, its a fucked up way. And I really wish you weren't so casual about sex."

"God, you sound just like my stupid brother."

"At least someone else is looking out for you."

"W'ever. I'm going. But, don't worry I'll make sure Mr. Going-on-fourty keeps his sick ideas to himself. I don't role play." Taking the food with him, Sin walks over to Andre and plants a kiss on the males cheek, then leans past it to whisper into his ear with a tone a little less friendly. "Thanks for a caring. But you don't run my life." Walking out with a wave over his shoulder, he decides to head back to campus, there has to be something or some_one_ fun to do over there.


	18. Innocent Ones?

Chapter 18.

_Where am I? ...Its so dark in here and... I can't feel anything. No up, no down, no left or right... Its like I'm falling but I'm not moving anywhere- whoa!_

It was as though gravity suddenly began to pull at him, as he sank and sank... but not in a dropping sort of way. It was more like melting until it just... _stopped_. But still, he felt nothing.

_Where am I?_ Again he questions.

Trying to move, his world feels like liquid: flowing, existing but refusing to keep hold even when bound by something solid. Gravity is moving him once again as he flows threw darkness in wonder of where he will stick- if he can; he's never had such a perseption of p.o.v before. No hands are visible, no body, no legs moving him forward... just a straight gaze.

_What is that?_

Something brown is coming into view very quickly. He's going to go right into it! Unable to close lidless eyes, he smashes into the solid object shaped much like a door minus the knob for entry or exit. Eyes still hard focused on nothing, he can see something before him, he's surprised to see his younger self sitting outside on the front lawn with Paula and Emily.

_...I... remember this._

"Aha," Emily giggled but the sound seemed more snide than friendly. "Paula you can't have tea without someone serving you first."

The brunette bowed her head, embarrassed. "Sorry."

Young Rocky reached outa hand and rubbed her back with a small smile as if to say, 'Its all right'.

She smiled back at him; the oversized silly yellow hat made her look even prettier to Rocky. Paula couldn't help but laugh when spotting the hole under the armpit of her best friend's clothes. Rocky is dressed in one of his old suits that has a tear in it for his tea party attire; he's also wearing a false mustache, that attaches at the nose by two little pincers. Emily looked adorible too, with her mother's old summer dress, and a large pink hat atop her head.

"Samuel, would you like some tea?" Emily asks.

"Okay."

_Aha, my voice was so high as a child._ His voice echoed throughout the memory, yet none of the children heard it.

"Paula?" The blonde girl offered after pouring her husband a cup.

"Yes, please."

Pouring a cup, she then says. "Help yourselves to some sugar." Plating up Little Debbies snack cakes, she passes the plates around the tiny table while the two guest get their sugar.

Rocky's gaze turned outward to the street, where a boy on a bike was speeding down the sidewalk coming to a slowed stop when he spots them all.

_Darren Whittle. _He identifies the blond boy who'd stole his bike two years later with his thug friends Baha, Andrew, Lucas and Chuckie.

"Are you playing tea party, Douglas?"

Young Rocky who had just picked up his snack, looked at the taller boy with a frown. Darren has always picked on him for being short- he actually picked on his brother Jeffrey too, but he's always tried to ignore him when at school but at home where Darren could just be a presence it was kind of hard.

"So what." He defends without a hint of anger or emotion in his voice. "I'm playing with my friends."

"That's right." Says Emily.

"Ha haha, only faggots play tea party!" He called out. "Faggot! Faggot!" He taunted.

"What's a faggot?" Asks Paula.

Young Rocky shrugged then went back to playing. "This is good tea Emily." He says hoping that Darren would get the hint and leave them alone.

"Only faggots play with girls."

Scrunching his face in anger, he shouts. "Then I guess I'm a faggot!"

That only made Darren laugh harder. "Oh man, what a freak!" He had to put both feet on the ground to keep the bike from toppling over with him. "That's too rich! I can't wait to tell the others."

"Darren." Says a mature woman's voice.

All the kids turn their heads to see Jessica standing at the front door, arms crossed, and looking less than happy to see the taller boy.

"Yes, Mrs. Douglas?"

"You'd better go on home, your mother is probably looking for you."

"Okay. Nice to see you ma'am." He turns his bike around, and casting one last look at Samuel he rides off.

Frowning, young Rocky runs over to his mother wrapping his arms around her legs while laying his now tear soaked face on her tummy.

"He called me names again."

"Aaaww sweetie. They're just names." She rubs her son's back.

"But he said only faggots play with girls. And Paul' and Emily are my best friends."

"Ignore him. He's just a bully because he's jealous of you. There's nothing wrong with liking girls, or playing tea party." Looking down the street with a bitter but hardly angry expression, as this is how young children act, she says. "He's gonna like girls some day, and who knows... maybe you can make fun of him."

Rocky laughed at that since he wasn't one for teasing. Better to do onto others what you want done to yourself. But should Jeffrey wanna throw his two cents around- which four seven years old was all he pretty much wanted to do, he wouldn't stop him.

"How 'bout you kids come play tea party inside for today. Hm?"

"Okay. Can you help us move the table- we've already served."

Laughing Jessica walks farther outside to help the kids bring their things in.

_She took our picture- whoa!_

His thoughts were snatched away from the memory so quickly that he was startled when the darkness returned.

_It all makes sense now! I'm inside of my mind! But Sin always said that he has full consciousness and control, he even has a place to stay! So then why am I floating in what feels like an endless void of nothing?_

He catches his breath as another door opens up pulling him in.

"Hey Sam," says Colt peeking over the top of the bunkbed they share. "Are you asleep yet?"

"I was. What is it?" He asks hardly in the mood to talk. "And keep your voice down." He adds after a second thought. "You'll wake Michael, and his first day of school is tomorrow."

Rolling his eyes, Colt lowers his voice. "I heard mom and dad talking about you earlier."

With an indifferent shrug he says. "Does it matter?"

Colt was silent for a moment. "I guess not but... What they were saying, it sounded so serious. At first dad was talking about how you really shouldn't be playing tea party with Paul' and Emily. But mom said that it was sweet, but then dad started going on about other stuff- like how you've been talking to yourself again."

Rocky laughed at that. "I haven't been talking to myself. I do have a friend but he's... he can't be seen by other people, that's all."

"You mean an imaginary friend? Call it what it is Sam."

"Why? He really isn't imaginary, and he's my best friend... he always looks out for me when I'm scared or in trouble... if that's fake... than I choose to ignore it."

Shaking his head in dismay, Colt turns back over to lay on his back. "You're crazy, Sam. Nine year olds don't have make believe friends... its not like you lack friends, you've got plenty- even my friends wanna hang out with you!"

Rocky always found that weird the way people flock to him at times, and then other times he feels completely alone. He's kind of out of the way personally, prefering that others make the first move rather than his self. He can't take the rejection, he supposed. But at nine, he really doesn't know what's going on with him.

"Basically they just want you to make guy friends so you can play more manly stuff- alright."

Agitated hearing that from a eight year old, he rolls onto his side to lessen the sound of his brother's voice. "Fine. I'll make some male friends." He mutters the last part already feeling his nerves prick up at the thought. "But making friends with girls is easier."

"I don't get that about you. Don't you know that girls have cooties?"

"If they have cooties then why do you keep flipping up their skirts whenever someone wears one on Friday?"

"Because Friday is flip-up day- don't you go to school?"

Rocky made a face that said he was more mature than that. Then another thing struck him. "Hey Jeff- I'm not asking because I want you to or anything but... why don't you ever lift Emily's skirts?"

"Because she's gross."

"I like her."

"As a friend. But wait until you're older- I'll bet she tries to kiss you."

"Yuck! She'd better not."

"Too late Sam, she's already plotted it out." Colt teased. "Behind the bush next to the house where there's no window for anyone to see you."

"Cut it out!"

He laughs at the idea of him and Emily kissing like all those gross movies their parents watch and, usually, Dad falls asleep to. Grabbing his pillow he whacks his brother in the face.

"Go to sleep weirdo."

"Okay. But don't you go naming any babies after me."

"Jeffrey!" He snapped it mock anger.

Rocky watched the two as their laughter faded when something caught his attention from the closet. The door closed, locked- come to think of it, they have a sliding door. How can something trapped inside not get out? All you'd have to do is-... The door burst open just then and a large black figure emerged from within the shadows, striding over to his bed.

_What's going on? _His astral voice is panicked. _Why don't I... remember this._

The figure froze when it was beside his bed, and it bends over him looking as though its speaking to him, but infact its touching him, lifting his shirt.

_Stop that! Leave him alone!_

The figure froze like it had heard him. Turning around, it walks right over to him! Right up into his face! He wants to close his eyes but... he can't! There's nothing to close, nothing to shield him, nothing to hide him! Hide him from... her...

Marissa's dark brown hair was the first to be shown then her pale round face, her dark eyes bore holes into his figureless life until the image blurred and Maria is placed before him.

_"Noooooo!"_

"Nooooooo!"

Wide eyed by how suddenly his voice just shot out of his mouth, Sin slaps his hands over his mouth. He's standing in the hall where his dorm room is. He arrived at the college six minutes ago, and has been walking to Rocky's dorm room. Everything was going fine, no one noticed anything out of the ordinary, and the next thing he knows he's screaming at the top of his lungs.

Hearing foot steps, Sin dashes up the last few steps to his room before that body guard Trent can come to his aid, or someone else in the hall comes out to see what the outburst was for. Closing the door, he catches a breath then wonders why the hell Rocky was doing that he so passionately let his voice slip out of his mouth. What did he see? What does he know? Hopefully nothing, and hopefully it will stay that way.

_Doesn't he know that if he shuts off that will end both our lives? I may be strong but... I am... just... just a brainwave._ And how he hated saying that about himself. He is real dammit! He is! There are lots of people who acknowledge him!_ Once he's shut down... once its all shut off, that's all. ...To not exist... to be nothing..._ His breathing comes out shallow and almost... afraid.

Sitting at the computer desk typing out a report he's doing, Robbie's attention is drawn to his roommate; Rocky looks frightened, almost terrified! Getting up from the seat as quickly as he can he grabs a hold of him, Sin slipping from his grasp with a quick jerk backward, slamming his back into the door, further thrashing when he's reached for again. Seeing the tears running down Rocky's vacant face Robbie knows that he can't give up, so once again he pulls him into him, this time getting a hold of the male hugging him close.

"Rocky... Rocky, what's the matter?" He asks tightening his hold, glad to feel arms come up around him in return. "Sssshhh.." He hushes him, petting Rocky's dirty blond hair. He always forgets how long its gotten, never getting to be anywhere near him- if the ninja can avoid it.

"Robbie." Sin whispers into the male's chest.

"Yeah?" He whispered in the same fashion that Rocky did. "Rocky, what's wrong?"

Digging his fingers into Robbie's back, he sniffles back tears; he is not about to cry right now. Not over something that isn't going to happen, nor is currently happening. Slowly catching his breath, his moves his hands up to the male's face to hold his cheeks. "I'm real aren't I? Tell me I'm real."

"You're real."

Sin nods, and bringing Robbie's face down the short distance to his own, he kisses him on the cheeks, chin, mouth, forehead, just anywhere he can! "I'm real."

Heart pounding in love and massive confusion, Robbie nods. "You're real. You're real... Rocky" When their lips meet briefly again, he pulls away. "Rocky where is this coming from?"

Hearing the name the male used on him everything came back into perspective, and Sin pulled away from the hug, he didn't even know that he wanted or needed. "I'm fine. I'm fine." He lied.

"You don't look fine, you seem freaked out."

Patting his hand against the door to locate the knob that's behind him, Sin keeps his eyes to the floor to avoid having Robbie discover that he isn't Rocky. "I'm gonna go." He says right before leaving the room in a hurry.

Dashing down the hall at top speed, so that the Canadian wouldn't catch up to him, and once beyond the safety of the door he presses the button to close the doors, then waits out the ride for them to open again. Taking a breather, he makes his way out once the ride ends and he promptly leaves the building. He needs a real friend, one of _his_ friends _not_ Rocky's.

...

"Sin, what are you-..." Andre's words are cut off by a very digruntled Sin grabbing a hold of him, pulling him close, alarming the bartender when he begins to cry. "What happened? Did someone hurt you?" After a second thought he asks. "Was it that guy who said he would pay you for sex?"

Shaking his head rapidly, like a child whose done something wrong and doesn't want to admit it just yet, Sin just continues to cry. The fact that his friend didn't feel like talking right then was read loud and clear, so Andre just let the hurt male cry his self to sleep. Setting a place for him on the couch, he explained things to his wife about who Sin is and why he's crashing on their couch tonight. She said she understood completely, then went to bed. She's had plenty of odd girlfriends needing a couch for the night. That's life.

To prevent Rocky from taking over while he dozed off, Sin was only half asleep. He smiled faintly at how good of a friend Andre is. But when the male retired to bed, Sin got up and left the house; he still has something left to do tonight.

...

The city noise was silenced instantly when Sin boards the elevator, riding it up the sixth floor. Eric said he should meet him at this place for their night together and since he could really use the money, he decided to show up. He wasn't going to. He wanted to cancel, tell the guy 'fuck off' because Andre cares enough to tell him to stop. His friend, cares for his safety. But with the way everything is going, he needs the money more than ever now. He'll make a new life all of his own, and never see anyone who doesn't care about him again.

The place is gorgeous, which makes the telepath feel like he should have squeezed the man for more than he originally asked. Everything is blue and black or a combination of the two in color, and glass this and gold that accent it. The windows are massive, looking over the whole city. He can only imagine what the room looks like. Butterflies messed with his stomach as he raised a fist to the door then pounded heavily on it.

"That had better be room service, although someone isn't getting a tip." Eric calls from the other side.

Sin shuddered hearing the man's annoying voice. He's never had someone rub him this wrong before. Maybe its just nerves because the man wants to fuck him, but that can't be it... he's never once been nervous about anything like that before- Hell, he's teased Robbie about it from time to time, he wasn't created to be nervous. The door pulled open and Eric splayed a croocked smirk on his face as Sin shoved his way in.

"Sin!" He announced like a gameshow host, and he wanted the guy at the door to come on down! "This is a nice surprise, I didn't think you'd actually show."

"I said I would." He shrugged, glad that his voice didn't portray what he's feeling inside.

"Drink?"

"I already told you that I don't drink."

Snickering he takes the drink down himself, setting the glass down on top of the glass coffee table with a clink, he strolls over to the bed and sits. Patting a seat beside him, he grins. "Get down to business, right? I like how fast you move Sin."

"W'ever." He takes in the decor, finding it to be a replica of the hall in the color scheme.

Hearing the man clear his throat in order to bring him back to the situation, Sin rolls his eyes then removes his shirt, tossing it to the floor with as much care as someone tossing away a bag filled with their dogs waste. Starting for his belt, his hands are stopped by Eric. The lecherous man pulls him over to the bed by the waistband of his jeans.

"I wanna do this part if you don't mind."

Glaring, ice cold enough to freeze the entire room he shrugs. "Makes you feel good."

"Hahaha."

Planting kisses on the younger male's toned torso, he smiles with deep appreciation when the muscles tighten and become more solid. Thick fingers fumble with the belt buckle before he's able to pull it free from the belt loops. He then moves on to the fly of the jeans.

"How did you get so fit?" He asks absently as he admires the blond's beautiful body by sight and appreciative touch. "It would take me years to keep up once I've gotten it." He kisses his way slowly down to his naval from the collar bone.

"I work out; I'm deciplined. You might wanna try it sometime."

The man only smirking at the snide comment, and in one swoop shoves Sin to the bed by his hip. His jeans are utterly snatched off, exposing him completely to the man's leering eyes. Straddling him soon after, he plants kisses all over him while working and thumping his hips down against him. Eric wasted no time with getting into a frot with the younger male; and engulfing Sin's mouth with his own for gross and sloppy kisses that the second-guessing young man doesn't want. Turning his head to get away from them, Eric only laughed.

"That's what I wanna see."

_Weirdo. I should blast your mind into mush._ Thinks the male.

Its unintentional when he begins panting heavily; its not as if he's getting off, no, he's panicking. Eric's thoughts are projecting loud and clear in his mind, so-much-so that Sin got the message that he isn't getting the check until the deed is done then he would sign it. Caught off guard by his nipple going into the male mouth, he gasped.

Controlling his body, he looked around the room for something to take his mind off of what's about to happen. But the more weight Eric put into grinding him the harder it was to focus as his back arched from the bed with a moan; images of that boy ran through his mind. Their times together, he was good to him, and then their end... Sin'll never see him again, no one will.

The man is completely sweaty panting something as he parts Sin's vicegrip clamped thighs. Shaking the webs from his mind, Sin growls hearing the name come from the mans mouth.

"Rocky." Pant. Pant. "Good little boy..."

Putting his hands on the man's chest, he shoves him to the floor. "Get the hell off of me!"

"What? What is your problem?"

"Sin! My name is Sin! Not Rocky, not Sam! Just Sin..."

Goofy grin on his face, Eric smooths his sweat drenched hair. "Come on. Don't tell me noone's ever asked you to do it with them."

"What are saying?" Though he was sure he had an idea.

Shrugging the man gets up from the floor then climbs back in the bed, putting his hand on Sin's thigh, rubbing gentle circles higher and higher until his fingertips brushed against his nether region. Its quickly removed by the owner of said thigh, who is now holding it hard enough to break bone.

"You're really mad aren't you?" He asks seeing an almost spooky gleam in the male's green eyes. "I didn't mean to offend you its just that... Well, you're hot, but your brother... he's got a mark on him that makes him just a hair hotter."

"Oh... I see..." He nods. "Because your into guys that are innocent, sweet, really have something to be robbed out of them."

Snake of a smile, he puts up his fingers in gesture. "Only a little bit." Touching Sin's cheek, he caresses it. "Don't tell me you don't feel the same way at some point about someone?"

"No."

"Hn. Aren't we so holy. You've got tainted written all over you- little slut. You can't mean to tell me you don't ever look at someone with their eyes still full of dew and wanna take it from them."

"I'm not tainted." Tears well in his eyes. "I'm loved. I'm loved like he is."

"If you say so." He kisses him on the shoulder, collar bone and neck. "Pretend, for my sake that you're him. Or would you like it for your own sake to be clean again."

"Hn. If you're so tainted than what happened? What's got you so bent on it?"

Licking a trail up the boys neck, he shrugs. "I guess I never had kids of my own. Never got someone to smack around like my father beat me."

That made Sin laugh. "And for this you've become a sick, kinky bastard? You're pathetic."

"Honestly," His tongue traces just beneath Sin's member. "I've recently been into porn, personal files... you know, webcam stuff. Bondage, beaters, children, just stuff."

"Stop talking, I've heard enough." Sin shoves the man again. "And have decided that you must be punished for doing things that are less than savory."

"What?" This got him to stop.

Getting up from the bed, he picks up his clothes then gets dressed, with Eric's perverted eyes on him the entire time.

"You can't be forgiven, you have to pay for what you want to do with me- for wanting to hurt girls and little boys like Noelie- tell me, did you seek me out because of my reputation or because of my brother?"

Eric said nothing, he just stared in curiousity.

"Guess thats my answer. Sign that check, and I'll be on my way."

"I didn't get what we agreed on."

"And you will. Sign it." Walking to the desk he grabs a pen then hands the check book to him. "Sign it."

Rolling his eyes, he signs the check then hands it over to him.

With a smile, Sin stands and heads for the door. "Enjoy."

The man's screams could be heard clear outside of the building even with the noise of the busy city buzzing about. He wants to take innocence, than the innocent within his sick mind shall take him out, with pins and needles; but in Sin's case pins and needles tend to look like swords and daggers. His mistake. Hn. Its more likely Eric's mistake since he's the one who brought the punishment on himself. He deserves to be stabbed to death over and over and feel every twist of the blade. His neighbors will hear, call the cops, and then oh nooo, is this child pornography on this man's laptop? The police will frown heavily upon that. Then its bye bye pedophile. Justice is served.

Going back to Andre's he sneaks into the shower and practically tears and scolds his skin off before moving back to the couch to lie down, but the ordeal was so intense back there that he, accidentally, fell into a heavy deep sleep.


	19. Truths

A.N: Be alone, be very alone.

Warning: This chapter contains sexual nature between two boys, if this bothers you then by all means skip it when you get to it because where as it has a point in the story its really just gritty details ^_^. And don't you tell on me, shame on you.. this is simply a story why should it offend. I warned you- can you take it! I believe in youuuu!

Chapter 19.

Sam Douglas prized his self as a solid and stable man. He believes in many things as well as he disbelieves in things. He shaves every morning at the same time, he does this because he believes his stuble will be gone longer. He drinks coffee that his wife has made, he does this because he actually knows that his coffee is bad. But there are things that he doesn't believe whether they're whispered about as the truth, or if they've actually been shoved right under his nose and proven. One of those disbeliefs is that the mind can go beyond its limits to actually let someone simply glance at something to make it move.

He also doesn't believe that his son could be one of them to have this mad-woman want him as badly as she did. It was nothing but sick fascination, as all abductions and kidnapping cases are.

The F.B.I have been gathering information on this Marissa Balsam woman for months and she's developed quite a profile. It doesn't matter that the clinically insane woman is dead, they still have to build a file on her should anything new come up, or should they have to use them in another case. Its part of the job. But Sam can't seem to wrap his brain around the huge folder that was given to him from the psycheward. Her brainwaves have the weirdest pattern to them, not that he understands that sort of thing, but inside the file is the scan of a normal human brain and it just doesn't match up with hers, which is why when Marissa had killed her husband for sleeping with another woman. She'd never served jail time, getting off on an insanity plee.

The L.A.P.D searched through her entire home for anything they could find that would incriminate the woman, and boy was there a lot to go on. It took a long time to find though, because it was very well hidden. But by the end of the month they found themselves ankle deep in a slew of video tapes found in Marissa's California home. She owned three houses: the one in Canada where they found his son, and the one in Connecticut, and the one here in L.A.

Sam looked over all the tapes but played none of them as the first name he saw within the row of tapes was the name 'Samuel'. Sam Douglas refused to look at it. He refused to look at any of them because he was afraid of what he was going to find, and it made him sick. But this is his job, and he must do his job. Which is why he gave the tapes to a member of the team that he knew he could trust, a man he knew wouldn't say a word to anyone no matter what, his partner Jerry Bowers. He couldn't have whispers start again over his son, when Samuel's already been broken so badly.

Sighing, Sam flipped open file after file on this looney woman, and he hated every bit of what he saw. But when he came across a plastic bag within the files he cocked his head at the contents in it. Two small pieces of paper with a baby's foot print on them, a snippet from a babies blanket and two clippings of hair, one of which looks a lot like his son's, the other is a bright blond. Was the woman so sick she had to have his birthcertificate and things? He wished she were still alive because he would have wrung her neck if he could.

"Arc Balsam." He read quietly. Glancing over the paper he notices his son's name and pales.

"Sam." Says his partner showing up suddenly. "Sam, I really think you should come look at this."

"Not now, Jerry. I have a ton of things to look over from this woman's home." He says absently staring hard at the birthcertificate. "Jesus, how sick was this woman that she would declare my son the father of one of her children?" Looking over the other certificate he notices the name of the woman's husband written on it.

"Sam, I _really_" he stressed his voice heavily to tell him how important what he has to say is. "think you should come look at this."

"What is it?" He asks, this time looking at the black man.

8 8 8

Rocky cracked his eyes open, blinking as he tries to see through the blur of his tired vision. _Wait a minute!_ He quickly sits up looking down at his hands. A smile breaks out on his face as he looks down at his hands, which quickly come up to his face to touch his cheek.

"Its me... I'm back." He says quietly.

Looking about his surroundings he wondered how long he's been under Dr. Huffman's hypnotism but when he didn't recognize the surroundings, his eyes widen in fright. _Shit._ He can hear the tv going in another room then a short sound of laughter. Getting up from the couch, he dashes across the room hoping to get out of wherever it is Sin has left him.

"That guy cracks me up." Says a voice that, now that he's really listening, sounds really familiar and is getting closer.

Using as much speed as he can muster he hides his self in the stranger's home. Peeking from his hiding place, he spots that guy from a week ago or... whenever he'd met with him. The homeowner walked over to the couch, and looked down with his hands on his hips.

"Dammit. Sin, you'd better be in the bathroom."

Sure that he's in good hands, Rocky steps out from his hiding place. "Andre." He says quietly.

Confused at his friends tone, the hispanic male comes over to him for a closer look. "Sin?" He asks, becoming even more confused, when the face he's looking into doesn't match the one that was just sleeping on his couch not too long ago. What was going on here, did the two of them switch places on him as some kind of joke, because he doesn't think its all that funny. "Rocky? Where's Si-..."

Holding up a hand to speak he says. "We need to talk, and please... listen without interuption." He let out a steadying breath. "it's time that I got this all out of my system before something else happens."

"Get what out?" Asks Andre with a little fear in his tone.

"Please, let's just talk."

"Okay, come in the kitchen I'll get you something to eat."

Feeling a little hungry he didn't object.

...

"So you're saying that Sin isn't real, that he's... some sort of alternate personality of yours? That's twisted." He shakes his head in disbelief. "But... you guys are so different!"

Rocky nods taking a sip of coffee that was offered to him. "That's how it works; the alter is like a completely different person from yourself, it acts on its own in some cases, others seem to have complete control over them because the alter is just a made-up pep-talk. But in my case and others', it acts on its own and speaks on its own... basically you're nothing when they're in charge."

"Wow." He runs a hand through his slightly curled hair. "This is just... some freaky shit. I didn't think stuff like this happened except from tv, ya know?" He sits quietly contemplating for a moment then he says. "How long has this been going on?"

With a shrug Rocky says. "Since I've been abducted, that's when it started... but... I'm so completely out of touch with everything that's going on lately, I seriously don't know whether or not I'm coming or going."

"That really has to suck." Says the bartender.

"It sucks for you too, finding out that someone you care for is..." he trailed off.

With a shrug, he says. "Hey I don't care, you're pretty ok. Sin is a good buddy, you know that, but at the same time if he's you and you have no say over his actions... then as a friend of both of you, it's my duty to protect you as well."

With a scoff he asks. "What are you talking about?"

"You know, if Sin ever gets out and comes to the club... I'll see to it that he doesn't do something stupid."

Smiling, Rocky nods to that declaration. "Thank you."

"Naah, its nothing. I'm just glad you told me." He sighs. "It makes sense now, that on that night when you went upstairs with that guy Sin came back down. And that he never told you that I wanted to talk to you. There were just so many things about him that didn't add up, but I didn't wanna pry."

"I understand." After a second thought he says. "You seemed concerned about Sin not being on the couch, what did you mean by that?"

"That creep, he spent the night over here and when he conked out I went to bed but woke up around... hell, I don't know, three... and he was gone. I searched for him and he eventually came back on his own- I saw him sleeping on the couch again when I came home to ask Carmen to help me look."

"Your wife?"

"Yeah."

Nodding, Rocky wet his mouth in contemplation. "Um, do you know where he went?"

Andre shrugged. "I think he went to see some guy- probably the guy from the club, because he said he would give him some money to..." He bit his tongue.

"What?"

"Sleep with you."

Rocky paled hearing that. "Did he?"

"I'm sorry, I don't know. You want a ride to the hospital?"

"No... I'm good. I don't think he did anything."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. I... I just have a gut feeling that he didn't." He holds tightly to the warmth of the coffee mug, hoping that it seeps into his chilled bones.

Reaching across the table he holds the male's hand. "Are you gonna be ok today? You can stay over with me for as long as you want- I could use a sitter." He smirked.

Laughing, Rocky declines. "I'd love to sit for- Dana" He says when searching his memory for names of people he doesn't recall ever meeting. "but I don't think so. I have a lot of things I need to get off my chest today and-," glancing at the clock he sees its well into the afternoon. "So little time to do it in."

"Okay." Standing he holds out his hand. "Thanks for making me one of the people you told." He shrugs. "I get the feeling I'd of been pretty sore if you left me out of confessions, and Sin just disappeared on me."

"Andre... You're ok with Sin and I merging aren't you? I mean, you won't try to shout him out of me so you can hang out?"

"I'm not a kid. I can let go of those I love." He elbows the male in the side playfully.

"...Thank you." With a quick hand raised, he walks out of the kitchen through the living room, and out the door. _Next stop, Robbie._

9 9 9

**"I Don't wanna do it unless he's playing with me." Says his young son.**

"That's my son." Says Sam eyes glued to the television.

A young boy with long blond hair comes into the room, its pulled into a ponytail of curls dipping just between his shoulder blades. He bounced on the bed looking rather comfortable beside his son as he puts on a false smile and says 'Hi' to him.

Rocky waved, then the two look at the camera- or rather past the camera to the person- probably Marissa who is holding it. Since the woman is mute it only makes sense that he and Jerry can't hear what she's saying, but why can the children? Reports say that she has spoken mentally with her doctors numerous times, so that must be it then. She really does have mental abilities.

What happened next made Sam wanna vomit; his son and this other boy lay down on the bed. His son's pants are pulled down just below his-... Stopping the tape Sam looked away.

"This is disgusting. When did this? ...Our son has never been anywhere on his own- when did this take place?!"

Jerry shrugged. The dates were left off of the recordings. "But I noticed something though, all the tapes are done in the same location and there's a window behind them- it happened at night."

Sam Douglas paled hearing that. His son had been sleep walking- sleep walking to this woman's home to do... this! He's never had recollection of what he's done or where he's been just that his son was always fully dressed when he awoke in the morning or that he was sitting by the front door as if he were on his way out. Tears well in Sam's eyes and he lets them fall. "That sick bitch." He sniffles. "That sick bitch." He says again and again.

Jerry walks over to the man placing an arm around him.

"My son, was molested by boys." He cried out. "My son... My son, Jerry!"

"I know. That woman is fortunate to have died in a fire; but all we can do now is... is find these boys and see to it that they know everything is ok."

Nodding Sam wipes his tears, running a hand over his face. "Right."

"Are you gonna tell your son?"

Sam thought about it, his mind racing. But with a firm nod he says. "I have to... my son is in therapy because of this woman, and he has to know what happened to him."

"I hope it goes well man."

"You and me both. Something like this... he could spin out from." He tries to collect his self.

He wasn't sure how he was gonna tell his son about this, muchless his wife and other kids. But what he saw... its worse than the pictures the woman took of him when she had him, worse then when she kidnapped him and dragged him out to the woods. Something else dawned on him, the certificates! It couldn't be... it couldn't. Rushing back into his office he picks up the birthcertificate and reads over the entire paper. "May 4th, 1994. Arc Balsam... Mother Marissa Balsam Father Samuel Douglas... It just, can't be."

Having followed him his partner looks over his shoulder. "What is it, Sam?"

"Looks like child pornography wasn't the only thing this woman wanted my son for."

9 9 9

Rocky opened the door to his dorm room. Glad to see his room mate laying on his bed reading, he wet his mouth feeling a knot form in his stomach- he really should have saved this for last. But its too late now, and he's already formed the name in his head, lips ready to carry it out as he says. "Robbie?"

Lowering his book, the teen smiles then gets up from the bed to hug his friend, glad that he's come back. He's been worried sick about him all night, and he thought about calling the Douglas but chances are that he was over there anyway. He had to learn to let Rocky be responsible, and heal without the constant supervision of everyone he knows making it impossible to do alone.

"I'm glad you're back." He whispers smiling over his friends shoulder when he feels the hug so firmly returned.

The odd part of it was that when he went to move away, his cheeks are grabbed within Rocky's hands and he's pulled into a deep kiss. When the kiss is broken, Robbie blushes then looks down.

"Rocky what're-..?"

Shaking his head, he takes a step forward wrapping his arms around the brunets back.

"Don't speak." He says quietly before putting their mouths together again.

Robbie is lead backward to the bed, falling down onto it when the backs of his knees bump into it. Stepping from his sneakers Rocky then climbs onto the bed hips achevel to the other boy's, who'd been knocked onto his back. With a slight lean left, Robbie takes the hint that he's intended to be on top. Complying, he rolls them over but doesn't move. He searches Rocky's eyes for the truth to his actions, but he doesn't get much looking time because of the Douglas boy claiming his lips once again. Robbie seriously didn't know what was going on, if Rocky wanted just to kiss him or go all the way but he's satisfied with just this if its all the other boy wants.

Hands touching the beautiful blond's pale cheeks he sucks in each breath of the kiss as if to extract every once of euphoria he's being given. Like mad men the two of them battle at the mouth, moving nothing more as if reality would set in if they did. Each soft whimper from the Douglas boy's mouth made Robbie shiver with pleasure, he tilts his head hoping for more... wholly surprised when he receives just that and Rocky's tongue comes into his mouth chasting past his own as if to ask for permission. Surely Robbie was dreaming, he has to be! There's no way that he could actually be kissing the crush of his dreams, the sole star to all his latest wet dreams this seriously- unless.

Breaking away from their conjuction, exspelling a heated breath at yet another sensual whimper from Rocky, he has to ask the question. "Sin?"

Panting, a near angered look on his face, mostly because they stopped, Rocky removed his short and long sleeved inset shirt, dropping it to the floor, grabbing then the hem of Robbie's to alert him that he wants the same.

"Wait." He holds his shirt down. "I don't want to do this if you're not Rocky." He insists.

Holding his chin within his left hand, right supporting him as he sits up, Rocky kissed the boy softly. "Robbie please, if you stop than I'll stop, and I want this." Placing his mouth by the brunets ear he whispers "I'm not Sin." before giving the lobe a playful nibble.

He then moved his mouth down along the male's jawline and back over to his mouth, giving little licks to it asking for entrence. Robbie complied and parts his lips, twinning his kiss to the blond's as they lay back down.

The Ballarini boy shuddered when the tip of his tongue is sucked for a second before he broke their kiss for the fourth time since they'd started, but he had a good reason this time because he needed to remove his shirt too. Doing so with ease he tosses it somewhere in the room. Laying down atop the other boy, his hands made theirselves busy exploring every muscle that populated the ninja's body; excited when they contorted under his touch. It was Rocky's turn to shudder now as his friend's fingers traced tingles at his sides and stomach with their light touch.

Breathing picking up as their pants begin to strain, Robbie dares to try moving his hips, receiving shock after shock from the male, who was once repulsed by him but is Rocky grabbing him by the sides and digging one heel into the bed to steady his self in order to grind up into him. Robbie's mind screamed with pleasure and he was sure he looked possesed by the way his eyes rolled up into his head just then.

Hoping to not be outdone, he has done this before after all, he grinds back down into Rocky's solid need. Their feathered breathing lifted and dropped their chest, nipples grazing in the process when they returned to laying flat against each other, and their elevated explored pleasure was becoming very consuming!

Finally in need of air, the two part mouths panting into one anothers', sharing their heated air. Robbie was intoxicated by the blond's breath, it tasted like he's recently had coffee and the taste of his tongue underneath that is to die for; at the rate their covered hips are moving, he probably might die.

On the same page they felt terribly over dressed, as their tightening in their jeans begged for sweet relief, so they quickly remove their jeans; Robbie hated removing himself from around Rocky's hips for a second but it was the only way to get the pants off, dropping them to the floor as frantically as he could; he had to smile hearing Rocky chuckle because of what a hurry he seemed to be in. But Rocky didn't understand what this was for him. Its like every holiday you love rolled into one nice little package, and he can't wait to play with it.

"I'm not going anywhere." Says the ninja.

Titling his head back again chuckling when Robbie takes that as a hint to suck on it, he actually just wanted to see where the dresser was but didn't stop the guy from using his neck as a chew toy, if that's what he wanted to do. With a quick flick of his fingers the drawer snatched open from its place in the dresser and fell loudly to the floor.

There was a knock at the door causing Robbie to nearly jump to the moon- as a drawer opening by itself was common with two by now.

Rocky held him fast. "I'm fine!" He called to the only person it could be. Trent.

He thought his father told him to back off, but maybe he didn't actually get around to it since he's been so busy. When the sound of foot steps came the two went back to what they were up to.

Rocky hummed tasting the caramel candy on Robbie's breath; he swears he could kiss him all day- though he's gonna have a word with him for getting into his stance. But that isn't why he's here doing this. He wants to rid himself of Sin, he wants his life back! And if this is what will get that and confessing everything that's been troubling him to the people he's been keeping secrets from then may it be.

Truthfully, he really does want this. He's had a lot of time to think about it while he's been out, and on the drive over. This is something he wants, this guy's affections. His love, and to return it. And judging by his body's reaction it isn't just his mind thinking it, but his heart wants it too. He's gotta be in the portion of the few people you'd meet that actually gets a rise because he wants to. Not because he's been drugged, and not because the world says its right to rub lowers together. But because he honestly has feelings for the person.

Rocky's eyes widen when he feels a finger between his buttocks; its wet and sticky which means while he was absently thinking Robbie must have taken the initiative to grab the lubrincant from the drawer. It pays to have a horny roommate, he supposed. Especially when he has condoms.

Bracing his self he feels the digit go within his body, gasping when he felt it moving. Wrapping his legs around the male, he lifts his hips from the bed to give him more access. Rocky felt a nervous lump form in his stomach as Robbie placed another digit within him, it didn't hurt so far but who was to say when it would, after all, he's been ripped open only so many months back this could make his treated injury act up.

Back arched from the bed, he catches his breath then pants through kisses while Robbie strokes him from within just long enough to distract his mind for him to slip inside. Rocky's eyes scrunched from the difference but readily kissed the pain away as they adjusted to being attached. That nervous lump Rocky felt quickly turned into a ball of liquid fire that spread throughout his body as though it were gonna fry his brain. It feels so good!

A steady hold at his nips, Rocky hooked around him with arms and legs, they began to rock insync with each other; their voices crying out softly as its still early and people might hear them. Robbie tweaked a pert nipple that's been flirting with his own and that sent Rocky over the edge as the brunet exploited his weakness to him. The fingers then danced along his torso to his most sensative place- for any male- and with a firm grip Robbie picked up the pace both with hand and hip.

After that... oh, the room became nothing but white as Rocky was blinded by pleasure, with the only thing he can acknowledge that says he's still in the room is the creaking of the box spring and the groaning of the bed springs. It was heady, and ravanous that he'd then slipped unconscious but not before hearing a concerning 'bang' accompanying his release...

8 8 8

At the Douglas home. Jessica is mixing a package of seasoning into her rice checking over the small box for the instructions; she's never made this before. She heard the car door open then close announcing that her husband came home. It seemed a bit early but who was she to complain. The front door slammed, which concerns her now, because what could be the reason for her husband has come home.

"Sam?" She calls to him.

"Jessica. Is Rocky home, I need to ask him some things."

"No. I think he may be at school, should I call him? Is this important?"

"I'll say it is, look at this." He drops the folder to the counter top.

Looking it over Jessica frowns then looks it over again. "Do you think this is..."

With a shrug, Sam puts his hands on his hips distress written all over his face. "That's what I'd like to find out. Rocky's roommate is that woman's nephew right?"

"Uh huh."

"Good. I can ask him about it directly. I'm going over there."


	20. Face the music

A/N: I wrote the wrong date in the last chapter my bad but I'll fix it later. Now this story is almost over although I really think it should end in an epilog. Now, I'm gonna write a much younger story after this because I'm starting on my Tum tum's and I have one last Colt to do. But this is a question for you guys. Should Rocky remain gay in my fics. Its up to you, I personally don't mind, I love it hahaha but its up to you. so I want you to pour all the chakra into your fingers and let me know. Enjoy the chapter thanks for reading. Lighter.

Chapter 20. 

Eyes unfocused, his vision begins to clear. Looking left then right; Rocky wonders where he is, why his legs are moving on their own and to where are they taking him. The wooden floor beneath him creaks in his ears, a familiar sound somehow. Hand coming out before him, he pushes open a door that stands in his way. His vision leaves p.o.v and he can actaully see his self walking into the strangely familiar bedroom. Eyes glancing back and forth he sees ahead of him a bed with toys lining the wall its settled next to. Kneeling down beside the bed, he smiles at someone. Mental vision glancing in that direction he sees his self- well a younger version of his self sitting on the bed playing with a stuffed bear. He's smiling and looks happy. 

"Hi." He greets his younger self. 

His younger self says nothing. 

"What's your name?" Again he gets nothing. Smiling, he taps the boy on a bent leg that's curled underneath of him. "I'll bet I can guess." His voice is teasing but in a kind way, not actual teasing. "Is it... Adam." 

As if his younger self had just noticed he is there, he shakes his head with a playful smile. 

"No, of course not." He tries again. "Could it beeee... Todd?" 

This time the boy scrunched his nose making him laugh. 

"Okay. No Todd." He pretends to think again this time really hard. "Could it beeee Samuel." 

The young boy shakes his head. This shocked Rocky. He could have sworn this child is his younger self. He looks so much like he did as a young boy. 

"Well, than what is it?" 

Facing him, eyes bright, he says. "My name is Sin." After that he giggled insanely like someone were tickling him. 

Happy expression dropping instantly, Rocky shakes his head in confusion. How can that be? How can this boy be Sin, he's so young! He knew he came around when he was eight, at least, but this boy looks much younger. 

"But _his_ name is Samuel." He points over his shoulder then leans in covering the side of his mouth with his hand to keep it a secret. "He's kind of a cry baby." 

Looking over his shoulder Rocky's mouth drops upon seeing a twin of Sin sitting in the corner of the bedroom, curled in on himself with his gaze at the wall. His body is shaking and now that Rocky listens closely he seems to be crying. Crawling over to him, he swallows hard then takes a seat beside him. 

Grabbing the boy lightly on the shoulder, he says softly. "Hey." When the young boy turned to look at him, he asks. "Why are you crying? Did someone hurt you?" 

Sniffling, Samuel nods then he shakes his head. 

"Well, which is it?" 

"I don-..." his voice cracks. "know." He burst into a loud sob. 

"Ssshhh, shhh." He hushes the child. "You don't have to be afraid, I'm a big kid. I'll protect you." He wipes the boys tears. "Just tell me who hurt you." 

Sniffing, the young boy rubs his eyes with the backs of his hands. 

"Samuel?" He tries to coax the boy to speak, rubbing his shoulders warmly. 

"Sh-..." he sniffles again. "She did." He points. 

Looking to where the boy is pointing, Rocky's trained gaze is staring at nothing more than a large shadow but set before the shadow is a camcorder. Standing, he walks over to the shadow, head cocked he looks it over. He's seen this shadow before, frequently to tell the truth. 

"I'm ready." Sin says out of nowhere. 

Samuel began to cry again, turning his face to the wall. Rocky looked over his shoulder at the boy who went from playing with a stuffed animal to laying down on his back on the bed. Looking back at the camera he started to put one and two together. 

"Sin stop that! Get up!" Shoving at the camera it didn't move, he tried to shove it over again but still nothing. 

"Will he come and play with me again?" Asks Sin. "He's my best friend." 

A young boy comes rushing into the room and Sin claps his hands together then holds his arms up openly accepting the boy. Rocky's heart stopped beating right then. The boy that walked in the room looked to be about 10 or 12 but the thing that bothered him the most is that the boy is... 

"Its him... from my dreams." He steps back away from the scene unfolding before him. He jumped out of his skin when his back hit the wall but he then quickly dropped to the floor in the same position that his young self has taken. "I... I can..." He starts to rock back and forth tears streaming down his face. 

The two children on the bed look at the camera, a frown on the older boys face and smile on Sin's but it... its so sad. Rocky can see clean through that false smile as he's been wearing that same one since he got back. A snicker sounded from the entry way of the bedroom door. Opening his eyes Rocky sees Sin, his Sin, standing there one arm up on the frame looking right at home with his casual lean. Eyes abserving the two children on the bed he then looks at Rocky and frowns. 

"How did you get in here?" 

"Where is this place?" 

Cocking a brow, he looks confused but smiles when realization comes over him. "That's right, you've never had the pleasure because you told me to lock this door and never open it again." A mocking smile plastered itself to his face as he strolls into the room over to him, taking a seat on the floor. "You must be making amends or something corny like that otherwise you wouldn't have been able to get in here." 

"..." Voice shuddering, he asks again. "Where am I?!" 

Sin turns his attention away from the two children messing around on the bed to his counter part. "You can't handle where you are spaz. Look at yourself, your crying, curled up... Just like I first found you. It pathetic and sad." 

"I wanna get out of here." 

"Than wake up. I'm not gonna hold your hand to the exit, you know where it is." 

Rocky tries to move but his body is frozen. 

Sin's laughter fills his ears. "Run baby! Run! And don't look back!" 

"I'm trying I can't move." He whispers, ears covered, eyes closed. "Help me! S- somebody help me." 

Shoving Rocky on the shoulder laughing when the boy jumped. "Go! Go on! Go find mommy or daddy..." 

"This didn't happen." He mutters over and over when a faint moan hit his ears. "This didn't happen, this didn't happen." He sniffles. 

"It happened. It happened to me over and over again because you were too much of a wimp to just accept it was you." Spat Sin. Something was odd, though, like his voice was becoming cloudy with tears. "And the only person who was there for me was the one doing it to me." He ran his hand under his nose, sniffling. 

Rocky could barely make out what his counter part was saying, he was too busy trying to block out the sounds in the room. 

"Now he's... he's dead. I'll never... never get to see him again." 

Uncovering his ears he looks at Sin. "How can I... make this nightmare stop. I just want to be myself again." 

"Help me." Says young Sin, tears in his eyes. 

Rocky tried to keep his gaze to the floor but it was hard, Sin sounded so sad just then he had to look. The young boy has a hand out, reaching for him. No not him... past him to his younger self. It suddenly became so clear to him, what he had to do to be his self again. It scared him, he didn't want to, his whole body began to shake but... 

"Come on Samuel. We have to save Sin." 

"But I'm scared." 

"But he said he wouldn't hurt us." Rocky heard himself say it before he even knew what it meant. Confused for a moment by his words, he took a deep breath then spoke. "Sin... Sinclaire said he wouldn't hurt us. He loves us and he'll get us out of here. He promised." 

His young self shook his head. But a gentle touch from Rocky turned his head. "Please. I'll be right here with you and we'll face this together, all of it." 

Unsure, he nods. Following Rocky over to the bed, the two children stop moving to watch them. Samuel climbs on the bed on top of Sin, he lays down, hugging him until the two boys become one. Young Samuel's body jumped in fear but the older boy... Sinclaire he hushed his tears and whispered to him that first day 'I'll protect you and get you out of here'. The bed dipped beside Rocky and Sin took his hand. 

"That day when he... you shut off completely but he was gentle, you still bled- everyone does their first time, when you went home you'd created me and when you were questioned by your parents you honestly had no clue what happened and anytime that woman came to your house to retrieve you, you'd shut off." 

"My parents thought I was sleep walking- I, thought that I was sleep walking and seeing ghost but..." 

"Her face the kids she brought with her to coax you out again, they all became shadows. You were never seeing ghost you were seeing them but since I locked those doors you only saw what you were allowed to see." 

Crying Rocky wrapped his arms around Sin. "I'm so sorry that I did this to you. I killed your innocents because I was afraid to face the truth. You never got to grow up right and I'm sorry." 

"Its... ok." 

"No, its not. I've buried you when you came out after Maria was arrested because I thought I was losing my mind. A manifestation of my gift, that's what I thought you were." 

"I know." He squeezes him tighter. "And I'm sorry that I was such a pain to you, but, I wanted to grow up and live a life that I thought suited us. You were always so unhappy but you forgot about me so I never got to come out and hang out. It hurt to have protected you from your fears and just be forgotten about like I didn't matter... like he didn't matter." 

Rocky looked back at the two children. "This boy is... Sinclaire Maxim. My therapist' son. She took him too and he got us out like he promised. You named yourself Sin because he protected me and you protected me, I just put one and two together. He even laughed about how cute he thought that was when you told him your name." 

Nodding, Sin reached over and stroked the boys hair. "He would whisper to me that he was sorry every single time, that he would be gentle and protect me. That he was sorry that he couldn't help having fell in love with me but I fell in love with him too." 

"Like I fell in love with Robbie." Rocky whispered. 

"Here." He takes his hand and stands. "Let's get rid of this bitch for good." 

Looking at the shadow by the camera, Rocky's eyes widen in fear seeing Marissa standing there, wild gleam in her eyes as she watched the children, smile on her face. He shakes his head, cowering away from her piercing gaze. But a whimper from his younger self made him shake the fear off. 

"I can do this." 

"Good." 

The two of them put their minds together and the woman's face contorted in pain, as she and all her memories bent up into a ball and exploded her scream the last thing of her that existed until it faded away. Rocky broke down into tears from all the flashes that ran through his mind it was all so painful, all of it was Sin and all of his pain. He had been so selfish to push it all on him and for that he would forever remember the cocky male that is Sin but now... he just wants to go home and be with his family... for real this time.

"I admit it." He cries. "I'm afraid of you! I've been afraid of you and I always will be..." He wipes his tears. "I'm not perfect... I can't go on pretending to be fine when I'm broken."

Sin smiled at his counter part then slowly he fades away into his memories. Maybe Rocky isn't the weakling he once thought he was and maybe the guy will do the right thing for both of them. 

Eyes blinking open. Rocky stares around the room of his dorm. Heart full of pain, eyes wet with tears, he can't help but cry from the weight of it all hitting him at once. Stirring beside him, Robbie opens his eyes, concern marring his features when he sees that Rocky is crying. 

"Are you ok?" 

Rocky nods. 

"Did I hurt you? Was it too rough?" 

Rocky shakes his head.

Letting out a breath of relief, he hugs the boy closer. "Was it a bad dream then?"

Rocky nods. 

"Its ok. It was just a dream," he wraps his arms around him tighter, holding the weeping male close. "It can't hurt you." 

"No. It was my memories... every one of them." He looks into Robbie's eyes, pain reflecting in them. "It hurts so much that I can't even breathe right now." 

"I'm sorry Rocky." He strokes his hair, resting his chin on top of the other males head. 

Rocky cried his self to sleep and when he awoke he felt as though the crazy world that once just passed him by, since he was freed of Marissa captive, has finally slowed down. Looking at the darkness around him he could guess it was dark outside. 

_Ha. Look at that, I even know what time of day it is._ He smiles. Shaking Robbie awake, Rocky looked up at him and smiles. "What day is it?" 

"June 1, Wednesday." 

"June... I can't even remember January muchless last week." He let's out a sigh. 

Not sure if he should ask lest he open up a can of worms, he had to know. "Are you ok?" 

"I really am." Responds the lucid male. 

Grinning, he kissed him on top of his head. "Ok enough for me to ask iiif you and I are..." He let his words hang. 

"What?" 

"Well, we just had sex. I only assumed-..." 

Cutting him off he asks, stunned. "We had sex?" 

Frightened, Robbie waves his hands frantically. "I'm so sorry, I thought that it was you." 

Laughing, Rocky popped the boy on the cheek with his fist. "I was kidding. Yes, it means we're a-... a-..." He teases his boyfriends studdering. "I just... I don't know. When I think about someone I want to be with romantically I always see a person that gets me, no matter what. Someone whom respects my space when I need it and knows how to make me smile even when I don't want to. Someone that I can be friends with, that will love me."

"And that's me?"

"Yeah." He laughs. "I don't think gender ever mattered to me, they just have to be my type and that's how I find worth." 

Hardly able to contain his self, he laughs while climbing on top of the ninja, planting kisses anywhere his mouth would land. Rocky laughed trying to slip out from under him, not liking the skin on skin contact right now but not minding it so much. 

"Get up." He threatened playfully. 

"No." Robbie kisses him on the lips. "I wanna bask in it." 

Ceasing his movement, Rocky glares at the male in mock anger. "Okay. Ten minutes and then you're off." He wraps his arms around him, giving him a kiss on the neck. Turning his head to the side, he just notices something is off about their room. "What happened in here anyway? Earthquake?" 

"You don't remember?" 

Shaking his head, he continues to glance around. 

"I'm not sure if it was from fear or enjoyment because you kind of passed out afterwards but you hurtled everything from one side of the room to this side." Kissing his forehead, he chuckles. "You're the real deal, aren't you?" 

Assuming he meant his abilities, he nods. "I guess I am." He blushed when Robbie started to stare. "You're gonna shorten your running time if you keep staring like that." 

"I'm sorry. I'm just happy to see your eyes look like when we first met. A beautiful blue green." Breathing in the males intoxicating auroma, he sighs. "What happened between then and now. Did you find out about your past?" 

Nodding, Rocky frowns. "Every bit of it. Sin isn't the seven deadly anything. Its short for Sinclaire, a boy that helped me when Marissa brought me to her house to video tape me..." He glanced away from Robbie timidly. 

Wide eyed, he looked guilty. "That bitch. I'm so sorry." 

"It wasn't you who did it, so don't be." His frown deepens. "Tum tum knows because Sin told him, his real name anyway, but as for the rest of it... I don't know if I can tell my family about it, but if I don't... Sin might come back and Robbie I've never felt this clear or aware in months. He's gone. I know everything and there is no reason for him to stick around anymore but... I feel badly for him." 

"For Sin?" He questions. "Why?" 

"He never got to grow up, he remained that seven year old and constantly cried out to me but I ignored his pain just like I did when I told him to take mine away. He just wanted to be happy and grow up." 

"And now?" 

Smiling, he says. "I don't think I'd be with you if it weren't for his bravey to be his self. My bravery, that I ejected from myself so I could be safe inside a hole to cry over a past I couldn't remember. It didn't help that I was tormented by her as Maria when she came back into my life." 

"Mm." He intoned. 

"Your cousin Corin, she's been calling me. She wants to talk- about what I'm not sure." 

"She has?" 

Nodding, Rocky says. "All of Sin's events and memories are with me now. We're whole again... I have to tell Dr. Maxim what happened to his son." He closes his eyes thoughtfully. "I have so much I have to do, its almost over whelming but... I'm not gonna run this time." 

Smiling, he lowers his forehead to Rocky's giving him an eskimo kiss. "I'm glad to hear that. And if you need me, I'm here for you." 

"Thanks." Slapping the male on his sides, he says teasingly. "Times up." 

"Aaaawwww." 

"No 'aaaww' you swore." He pushes him over. "Now come on, we have to fix our room up." 

"Okay. Okay." He slides out of bed, cupping his manhood in his hand, he looks around for his shorts then retrieves them from his jeans. Snagging Rocky's he tosses them over to him. 

"Thanks." Sliding them on, he gets out of bed. 

The two of them worked the room this way and that, both agreeing that maybe the beds shouldn't be seperated by the dresser. It would be indicent to put them together should someone stop by but without the dresser there they have the option to push them together at night. Computer turned back on, broken picture frames cleaned up, the two of them were just about to pronounce the room done when there was a knock at the door. 

Mouthing, Robbie asks. "Who's that?" 

Rocky shrugged. "Come in." He says when he realized that he had locked the door when he came in. Crossing the room he turns the lock then pulls it open shocked to see his father standing there. "Dad! What are you doing here?"

His father stared at him hard causing Rocky's eyes to dart away. 

"Sorry. I know its late but we have to talk." 

"Uh... o-... kay. Come in." He moves aside then heads towards the closet to grab a shirt for him and his boyfriend. 

Seeing that the two of them were in nothing but boxers, Sam held up a hand to their fully dressing. "Sorry I woke you up, but this is important." 

"Its fine." Says his son taking a seat on his bed. 

Pulling up at the computer chair, Sam folds his hands together looking rather sullen. 

"Dad what is it?" 

Interrupting, Robbie says. "Maybe I should go." 

"No. I have to speak with you too." 

"Me?" Sure that he's in trouble he joins Rocky on his bed. 

"Robert, what is the name of your youngest cousin?" 

Taken aback by the odd question he replies. "Arc. Why? Did something happen to him?" 

"When is his birthday?" 

"February 7th. Where is this coming from?" He asks. 

"Yeah but what year?" 

"96." 

That made Sam sigh even harder. "That's what I thought." 

"Dad you're not making any sense." 

"Son. When you were 15, and I'm gonna need you to really think about this now." He looks his son right in the eye. "Did you sleep with that woman?" 

Blushing, and shocked Rocky shakes his head but then he stops. "I... I'm not sure, I think I was drugged. So maybe." 

Taking the hint, Robbie holds up his hand in protest. "Hold on. You're not saying what I think you're saying are you?" He looks at Rocky. "He can't be." 

A little dense, Rocky asks. "What is he saying?" 

"Son, we found a birthcertificate with Marissa's name on it and Arc's... and yours." 

"..." Rocky opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. Trying again, he asks. "What?" 

"We don't know exactly but there's a chance that... That you got Maria pregnant and didn't know. Her husband wasn't alive then and there is a good chance that she hasn't been with anyone else." 

Rocky was pale, almost sickly looking. He can remember blacking out and waking up with her on top of him but as far as sex went he was sure they didn't, but now that he thinks back to his locked away memories. It only made the color drain from his face more. 

"Robert, you're gonna have to call your parents and tell them we want to do a blood test on your cousin." 

"But Mr. Douglas this is insane. I know Arc and he... has blond hair. Ashy blond at that. But my uncle had blond hair, granted not the same color but... it just can't be true." 

"I know. That's why I want it confirmed." 

"And if he is?" Questions Rocky. 

"He won't be." 

"But what if he is?!" He looks at his father, jaw clentched. "How much more can this woman ruin my life before its enough." 

"It isn't going to be true. Marissa was a sick woman and might have just wrote your name down because she wanted it to be your child." Standing, Sam hugged his son getting nothing in return. "We're working as fast as we can." 

"Okay." 

"Good bye son." 

"Yeah, bye." He sits on the bed, eyes saddened. 

When the door closed, Robbie put his hand on Rocky's back. "You don't think that?" 

"Never mind that, he's seen the tapes Robbie. He knows."

"W- what? Are you sure?"

"He practically recalled my every thought when I looked into his eyes. I have to go home and tell them everything before I miss my chance." He crosses the room grabbing a pair of jeans. "I'll be back later."

"Wait!" He walks over to him. "Are you gonna tell them about us too?"

Rocky thinks that over. Bad enough he has to tell his family that he's a child porn star for some sick pedophiles that might have some copies and now his family is gonna be freaking out over the possibility that he might be a father. Sin sure left him with a lot to do. But he'll face it, no matter what.

Shaking his head, he says. "No. Not right now. I will tell them though once all this, madness blows over. Can you wait?"

Scoffing, Robbie pulled him into a kiss. "Hey I've got the better end of the deal."

Rolling his eyes, Rocky swats his friend over the head. "Were you always this corny." Smiling, he returned the smooch, then grabbed his sneakers and headed out. "See ya."

"Yeah bye." When Rocky was out of sight, Robbie grinned, arms up and he fell onto his bed a new man.


	21. This is my story

A/N: Thank you for the review and thank you all for reading. I can't wait to start another one doing fics is too much fun to stop. Hopefully this break won't be as long as the last one. Thanks again.

Epilogue. 

_I met Marrissa when I was seven years old. My mother asked Emily's mother Mrs. Hart to pick me up from school because she couldn't make it that day because Colt had an appointment. Mrs. Hart was working and would be late that day to get me, I didn't know. A car drove up and a darked haired woman stepped out calling to me by name. I was apprehensive at first, having never met the woman before. She told me that she works in my mothers office- that she is a contracter too. Marrissa then told me that my mother asked her to come get me because Mrs. Hart couldn't make it. She knew everything about the situation how could I not trust her. Getting into her car we sped off down the street to a neighborhood that I didn't recognize, telling me that we had to stay at her house until mom got home because no one was there and I shouldn't be left alone. It was quiet for a while, she gave me snacks and I quietly ate them, when she started asking me questions I loosened up a bit because they were nice questions. What my favorite food was, what grade was I in, favorite subject and tv show- stuff like that. After I mentioned my favorite show I accidently added the fact that I never got a Donatello ninja turtle but was too shy to ask my mother for one because she thought that I would like Leonardo best. Marrissa told me to come upstairs that she happened to have a turtle just like that._

_I followed her upstairs to this room full of toys and just was amazed at all of them. We played together and it was fun. She said the next time I came over she would give me the turtle- if I did something for her. I was young and naive, I promised I would come back because we had so much fun before. She brought me home and the day went on normally, that is, until night fell. Marrissa came to the house and asked me to come with her. I was freaked out but I couldn't not go with her because she was in my home which meant that mom and dad must have known about it. So I got dressed and went with her. We played just like before not as long as before, though, curiously I asked her about the thing I had to do to get the Donatello and she told me that it was silly and I might not want to. I asked again, what it was then she told me to lay on the bed. I did so. She said that all I had to do was open my pants and... play with myself a litte. I was shocked and embarrassed by that kind of thing, I knew little about sex much less masterbation but I've seen some of the soaps my mother watches when I'm sick and slept on the couch so I could be near her. It always made me feel better. So because of that I had a vague idea of sex._

_Marrissa told me it was easy and that it wouldn't hurt, it would all be over quickly if I just participated. I began to cry, I told her that I wanted to go home, she told me she wouldn't bring me home unless I did what she said. I swallowed back my tears after she roughly wiped my face. Doing as she said, I felt weird- really weird I couldn't wait until it was over and by the time it was I was dropped off at my house new toy in hand. I didn't see Marrissa for a while after that, I was beginning to think I never would but then she came to me again, she brought someone with her, Sinclaire Maxim. He asked me to just come with them, that I didn't really have much of a choice. His eyes looked so sad, I wondered if she'd made him do what I had done before. I felt bad, like he might have been forced to do it because I was such a cry baby. Agreeing, I went with them but this time was much different than before. Marrissa told Sinclaire to touch me! He said I was just a kid, but then he seemed really scared for some reason almost like he were gonna have an asthma attack and before I knew it he was pulling my pants down._

_I kicked him, I was embarrassed and didn't want anyone seeing me naked, muchless touching me; but he was older and held me down, not hard though and then he leaned over me and whispered "I'll protect you, I swear. I'll try not to make it hurt." I didn't know what he was talking about until he bent down there and put my... He put that in his mouth. It was weird, I wanted to flail again but didn't. I felt so hot all of a sudden and it wasn't scary, he was right that it didn't hurt... I think that, I think I actually enjoyed it. But my vision turned to the side and I saw Marrissa watching us from behind a camera, eyes darkened and scary. She looked so happy watching us I shoved Sinclaire away because it was freaking me out, that was when he shoved his finger into my body. I cried out, it hurt so much after that I just lost conscious. I was scared and confused. I wished I'd never gone home with the woman, that she never brought me back, that I'd never touched myself for her... It was over after maybe 15 minutes and she let me lay there for a bit then roughly pulled me up and held me saying that I was wonderful. My brain was buzzing whenever she spoke to me, I felt sick and dazed. That's when she whispered, it felt like her words were only in my ears in my mind and she told me.. "Our bodies are communicating." She then giggled and told me to pull up my pants and she brought me home._

_The next day I found blood in my underwear, I was terrified of my parents finding out so I threw them away and went to school. I felt like there were eyes on me the entire time and I wanted to hide where the eyes would stop looking at me. When school was over, I saw Marrissa again. I quickly dashed to my mom's car and ducked down as we waited for Colt to show up. Why wouldn't she leave me alone? I went home and had a normal day but when it got dark she came back again with Sinclaire she tore me from my house, I wondered why no one heard my cries as she dragged me away. Why didn't they hear me? This time was different, Sinclaire put his fingers in there as he had before but this time it didn't hurt as much as before, he told me he was sorry about that, that it hurt because I was tense and that I should relax, it would go quicker. How was I to know that he would roll me over onto my stomach and... I found myself at home the next day, a weekend, and just as I began to clean myself a red stream drifted through the bath water. I jumped out and ran to my mother and we went to the hospital. Eveyone questioned me about what happened but I had no clue what happened and after that I only saw shadows. Small ones, tall ones, but oe shadow always remained the same. Marrissa. I didn't know it was her because I didn't know that Sin had been created without my knowing it, that he had taken my memories and turned them into questionable dreams. The only thing I knew was that mom kept asking me why I was dressed in the morning, if I were sleepwalking or just wandering around. I didn't know what she was talking about._

_Sin was short for Sinclaire a boy he had fallen in love with because out of the seven children Marrissa paired them up the most. But when he helped me escape after I'd 'slept walked' to the extent of missing for two days, Sinclaire was killed and tossed to a place where no one knew of. Sin was never the same and went back into the darkest part of my mind to be away from it. I lived a normal eight year old life after that, but then one night when I went downstairs to get a drink she came back. I saw a shadow on the chair then at the kitchen doorway, frightened I hid in the closet, she pulled me out and took me with her. From Sin's memories she beat him then sent him home. I woke up with bruises and everyone thought I fell downstairs while sleepwalking. I told mom and dad that no, I didn't it was a ghost! Dad told me never to talk like that again. So I stopped. I let Sin take the brunt of my horrible past and I went on as if nothing were wrong. I never knew that Sin was playing mental games with Marrissa which is why when he showed his self to me again, he continued to ask about using my secret abilities._

_I kept them secret because after hanging out with this boy I used them and he screamed and ran home calling me a freak. It was then that I knew not everyone could do what I do. Sin always seemed mad at me for something but I ignored it because he never hurt me or was me, he was just using a hard tone. One year I went clothes shopping with my mother, she said we didn't have time to go and for some reason I threw a hissy fit and blacked out when I woke up a woman asked me if I wanted an ice cream and I went with her. Sin was raped that day, I never knew. He took a back burner when Tum was old enough and we got to spend time with Grandpa doing ninja training. It was fun. I had a good run without Sin or Marrissa infact it lasted up until I was 15 when a girl named Maria showed up at school._

_Something about her was so familiar and my brain buzzed whenever we were talking or alone together, and she made me feel uncomfortable and hot. She always talked to me like she was mad, and that she was pissed that I couldn't remember her. It made no sense to me really. The girl was clearly nuts. Before I knew it everything was falling apart around me. Emily accussed me of strangling her, a boy got hit by a car and nothing made sense but she was always trying to get me alone. One day I snuck over to her house and overheard her talking with someone- she actually knew that I was out there the entire time and staged the conversation it was then that I saw Marrissa again for the first time in years. I didn't recognize her, and because of her stolen journal I thought that she was Maria's aunt. She knocked me out in her car and I ended up back at home with no memory of what went on between. Maria drugged me and dragged me into the woods where she then raped me. I managed to give her a nervous break down by speaking to her and messing with her love for me I didn't know that I'd see her again._

_The image of a lanky blonde girl implanted in my mind is actually the looks of her only daughter Corin who stays with Robbie's family in connecticut after Marrissa killed her cheating husband and ended up in a mental home from which she was released and then came back into my life. Using her daughter as a doll was a ploy so that if she were identified Corin would be picked up and she would still be free to terrorize me. Corin would have been institutionalized as well, me recognizing her but her having no clue about me. Robbie is Marrissa's nephew, a somewhat physic which is why she loves him so much but he only gets preminissions and has no control over them. It makes me wonder if that's why I'm so drawn to him, are our bodies communicating?_

_Signing up for a teen help line Maria his nearby sending calls to me. Sin could sense her and came out now and then to watch my back. I had lost so much time during that year bewtween their game of tag and trying to stay out of trouble because the police thought I kidnapped some girl, Noelie. Having a headache I was forced to stop the car and that was when she took me. I was in Canada for months as her personal slave and it was grulling. I suffered mentally and physically trying to ward her off and please her. Sin returned to me, I had no memory of him because I had blocked him out unknowingly because of all the fun I was having with Grandpa and my life was going so well. I thought I had truly snapped but Sin knew so much about me..._

_In the end Robbie had ended up saving me by asking for help from the very person who had me. The pajamas, my picture in the diner window. He saved my life. I can't remember anything beyond coming home up until June 1st when I awoke in Andre's house. It leaves me wondering if a new threat has come into play, someone like me to the point of fooling everyone that I was myself. Or was I so out of it that I really was unaware of the time passing me by? I'm hoping for the latter. I don't want another alter impersonating me. Sin never once tried to take my life, just share it. So who... No, I'm getting ahead of myself. I'm now in my dorm room two weeks later after telling my parents pretty much what I've told you all. The tapes, Sin, where I've been- maybe not exact locations as being a homosexual now is still my secret to carry. But they know and it was hard for them to understand my abilities not to mention mom cried for a while because she blames herself for what happened to me as a child. I was mad at her because I blamed her too, but I don't blame her anymore- how can I? Besides, my nightmare was burned in that fire and she's never coming back. I can be happy again, I can be normal._

Rocky drew in a shaking breath as Robbie kissed his way from inner thigh all the way up to his neck, just below the ear, his lips lingering- tongue tasting down at his groin. The brunet groaned in defeat as their lips part. "Aaaa, you're killing me with that."

"What?" Asks Rocky, hand going to the back of Robbie's head pulling him back down for a kiss.

Snickering within the kiss, he breaks it to say. "If you keep doing those little moans of yours I'm gonna have to turn you into a quiet lover, its unfare what you're doing to me."

"Hn. You love being praised." He kisses him on the neck.

The two share another long heated kiss, tongue languidly dancing with one anothers. Robbie insisted on doing this because their first time was so fast he didn't feel that his new boyfriend was justly appreciated. Rocky agreed that their first time was rushed but regardless he didn't feel they needed to make up for that, he was happy with the way it went but the moment Robbie's hand slipped up his shirt he'd forgotten what he was going on about. The brunet was sly alright knowing just what to do to get Rocky to succumb to what he wanted, not that Robbie would force the ninja if he seriously said no but Rocky's only response to his advances were laughter. If its funny how much he loves him than may the laughter continue.

"Robbie," whispers the ninja.

The other male only lowered his lips to the ninjas stomach.

"Robbie?"

"Hmm?" Not realizing it was a questioning way his name was said, he blushed a bit.

"I have to tell you something."

"What?"

He's silenced when his lover straightens back up then grinds his hips down onto his. Eyes closing is ecstacy, his words now lost, Rocky fists a handful of the males brown almost curled hair while his other hand holds onto the males waist while he hooks them together.

"Rocky what?" He asks as though isn't the source of the males speech silence since he was hardly quiet.

"Umm, I forgot to tell you that I'm going on a trip tomorrow with my grandfather."

Ceasing his movent, he asks is a breath. "What?"

"He found me a master that can help me keep my abilities in check."

"Well, when will you be back- where are you going?"

Feeling like a jerk he admits. "Japan."

Sitting up, he says in utter disbelief. "That far?!"

"Its gonna be over the summer."

"So that's what... 2 and a half months without you." Climbing off the bed he goes to the dresser.

Watching, he asks. "What are you doing?"

"Condom."

"Cute." He says sarcastically.

"Seriously. If I can't see you for two months we're gonna have to really do something here." He climbs back onto the bed laying down beside Rocky. "Here. Put this on."

Rocky cocked a brow at the proposal. "Robbie... its not that I don't want to because I do, but... I think you should know this will only happen once a month." He looks at the ceiling. "I don't just wanna be about sex. You and I were friends before this and it was great, let's not change that. Okay."

"That would never change." He says quietly. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been so grabby, its just that this is kind of exciting, who can say they snagged the guy of their dreams."

"Hmm."

"If you don't want to, I won't push you."

Looking over at him, he smiles. "Good." Thinking silenlty for a moment, he takes the condom. "Alright. Sit on my lap and I'll give you a farewell."

Watching the blond put on the protection he's curious about something.

"Rocky?"

"Yeah?"

"When are you gonna tell your parents about us?"

"When I get back. Colt's gonna be here and he'll find out sooner or later so that's really the best time to do it." He shurgs. "Better me than him right?"

"Mm." He agrees. Sitting up, he climbs over the males him lowering his self down over him. "I'll miss you."

"You too."

Will they be accepted by his family, Rocky doesn't know. But he does know one thing. He's happy. Really happy.

THE END.


End file.
